It’s sad but it’s true that we are living in a world of fake relationships. This is best exhibited on social media. The need to show the hunky-dory image of a relationship is so strong that people tend to work on building the façade more than making an effort to make it genuinely caring and loving. One of the characteristics of a fake relationship is that it is always rife with signs she is pretending to love you or his love purely a pretense put on for the world.
Let me explain with an example then you will understand better. Liah and Roy (name changed) constantly tagged each other on social media posts. If Liah achieved something, Roy was the first one to congratulate his girl and talk about her qualities in great detail. But Liah over WhatsApp always complained to her bestie Annie.
Liah told Annie that Roy wasn’t supportive or caring and usually acted like a very selfish boyfriend. Annie asked her, “Then how come you are always so love-struck on SM?” Liah responded, “You can’t expect us to fight on SM. We are supposed to be lovey-dovey there isn’t it?” Fake relationships are a baffling concept really. They have the appearance of a normal, functional relationship.
From the affection to the drama, everything about that relationship resembles that of a normal one but from the inside it is hollow. Outsiders usually don’t have an inkling of that till the breakup happens. Then everything collapses in a jiffy, the can of worms are opened and some even indulge in blackmailing, SM shaming and what not.
What Really Is A Fake Relationship?
If you are looking for fake relationship meaning, let us tell you that it essentially means that a man or woman is pretending to love you. A fake relationship is one with the glowing appearance of a happy, loving one. It has the illusion of two devout partners who seem to genuinely try to make the relationship work. Yet, their feelings are not completely in alignment with their words and actions.
That’s why the signs she is pretending to love you or his feelings are phony begin to emerge early on in the relationship. While both partners may choose to ignore these red flags in the beginning, these signs only become stronger with time, and ultimately, take a toll on a couple’s bond.
One might often question, why would someone fake a relationship? The reasons for that are plenty. Sometimes, people only do it to distract themselves from their distressing loneliness. Other times, their motives could be far worse. They might be in it for the money and are basically gold diggers to elevate their status or want to do it for the sake of just bragging.
The emotional intimacy in such a relationship takes a dramatic backseat. Such a relationship lacks the genuine affection and concern of a real one. It only possesses the nature of a relationship in external circumstances. Since we have moved into a world of fake relationships, terms like cuffing, fishing dating, and benching dating have become so popular.
For example, a fake partner just wants to take you to parties with them in order to seem like they are settled and happy in front of their successful friends. They would want to have a fake relationship status on SM, but you could just be the trophy girlfriend or a standby boyfriend.
To indulge in bragging rights, they might only parade you around to show you off but turn the lights off on you and your love as soon as you get home. These are signs his love is not real or she pretends to love you. So now you get the drift of what a fake relationship is all about. There is no genuine love, everything is put on and the effort is to show to the world that they are the IT couple having a lot of fun together.
If you want to check out a fake relationship movie then our suggestion would be My Fake Fiancé, a story of how two people fake an engagement just to get gifts and presents. It’s a hilarious take on what happens when you pretend to be in love.
Related Reading: Here is why you can’t fix bad relationships with fake smiles
15 Signs You Are In A Fake Relationship
Being in a one-sided fake relationship can end up being a heartbreaking revelation for you. Because you might be giving your 100% to the relationship but your partner could just want that make-believe fake relationship. One must love freely but also be wary of the fact that the relationship that they are into is a phony one that could crumple any day.
To not be easily fooled, you should look out for the signs of fake love from a man or the signs she is pretending to love you. These fake relationship signs can easily help you figure out whether you’re just being taken for granted or not.
1. Your partner is very selectively romantic
How to tell if someone is pretending to love you? Pay attention to how much effort you see from their side in making the relationship stronger. When someone is leading you down the garden path and has only deception in mind they will make little or no efforts at romance. They might only be romantic with you when it serves their selfish desires and makes them feel loved. However, they will care very sparsely about what your romantic needs might be.
2. Paying minimal attention to what you say
“Remember that story I told you about that time I went to Amsterdam?” When you say such things, chances are that they will have no idea what you’re referring to. When someone lacks interest in you, they will also fail to be interested in the things you tell them. This is especially one of the warning signs she is pretending to love you because women tend to be instinctively attentive.
When a woman is truly emotionally invested in someone, she will remember the smallest details about that person. So, if you’re in a relationship where anything you share with your girlfriend doesn’t register with her, you can count it among the signs she no longer loves you or perhaps never did.
In that case, if you tell them a fake relationship quote like, “Don’t use someone just for your own benefit because you don’t know how much it hurts when they will know the truth,” it will not even register with them.
Related Reading: 12 Signs You Have A Selfish Girlfriend
3. The conversations are dry
Not only do they not listen to you, but they also put zero effort into having fruitful talks with you. Relationships are built on riveting conversations that keep you hooked to the other person’s personality. Yet, in fake relationships, the conversations are monotonous and awfully dull. There is no natural progression in the conversation and it comes off as more of a deliberate and formal attempt.
If you have been feeling that your conversations are forced and you have to go the extra mile to draw your partner out, that too with little or no success, the writing is on the wall: a girl is faking her love for you or a guy has no real feelings for you.
4. They are kinder to you only around their friends
One of the signs his love is not real is if his charm suddenly exceeds your expectations when you are around other people. Such a person only wants to put on a show for society. If he becomes bored and stops the cute forehead kisses that he enjoyed giving you in public, as soon as you get home, you know he was not being real in the first place. It is one of the obvious signs he pretends to love you.
Likewise, one of the biggest signs that she is not in love with you is that she will shy away from displays of affection in your personal space. While she may not mind you slipping your hand around her waist on the street, even the slightest touch will seem to repulse her when you two are alone. This is highly unusual for women who’re genuinely in love and happens only when they no longer care.
Related Reading: 12 Signs You Have A Selfish Girlfriend
5. No introduction to the parents
When a relationship is serious or is on its way to something more worthwhile, people normally enjoy introducing their partners to their families. Incorporating someone important into your life translates to adding and introducing them to the rest of the crazy bunch. Yet, one of the signs that his love is not real is if he does not bother to make you meet the family.
On the other hand, if you’re truly invested in the relationship and want to take the next step of introducing your girlfriend to the people closest to you but she keeps putting it off, you can count it among the signs she is pretending to love you.
6. No romance after the sex
It is hard to say whether, in fake relationships, the sex suffers or not. It might still be mind-blowing even if there isn’t an emotional connect. Yet, the intimacy you share right when the sex is over will definitely be lacking.
He might love the sex, but not love you even half as much. Or if a woman is pretending to love you, she might seem distant and aloof even during the act. Cuddling in the sheets, bringing coffee to you in bed, or laughing hysterically and cracking up at old jokes, are things they might not be willing to do once the deed is done. They may strictly just zip up and walk out. He is just pretending to love you.
7. Do you really feel like you know them?
One of the important signs his love is not real is if you occasionally realize that you actually do not know enough about your partner at all. When they do not seriously feel for you, they will not open up to you. They might have interests and hobbies that you might be completely unaware of.
Moreover, they might have some quirks and interesting mannerisms that they may not reveal to you. Perhaps they enjoy old Japanese films or like to collect shells from beaches- yet these are things you might never be able to notice or enjoy about them.
8. Forget about any grand gestures in fake relationships
Or perhaps, any adorable gestures at all. In a fake relationship, you’d be lucky to receive a bouquet of flowers on your birthday (that is if they actually remember it). One of the fake relationship signs is that they choose not to invest any energy in making you feel special. Cooking you a hearty meal or taking you out for a spin when you’re feeling low, are things they do not want to do.
So, if you’re wondering how to tell if someone is pretending to love you, just sit back and think when was the last time your partner did something that made your heart skip a beat? Can’t seem to recall? There is a good chance you’re in a relationship where a woman is pretending to love you or a man is with you only because you are serving an ulterior motive for him.
9. No talk of future prospects
One of the signs of fake love from a man is if he sees no future with you. When you are truly smitten by someone, you want their presence to perpetuate your life. Yet in fake relationships, the other person knows that this is going to end soon. Thus, they put no thought into it because you were never in their future visions at all.
He likes to flaunt his fake relationship status on SM but doesn’t talk about a future together ever. Similarly, if she clams up the moment you talk about even the near future, forget long-term plans, it’s among the classic signs she is pretending to love you.
10. Fights and grievances go ignored
One aspect of the whole fake relationship drama is that there are frequent fights. Yet a fake partner sees no reasoning in consoling you or even trying to resolve a problem. If you are holding a grudge against them, it does not move a single hair on their body. These issues may become gut-wrenching but will leave you helpless. This can be troublesome because, in a fake relationship, a lot of problems are simply brushed under the carpet.
How to tell if someone is pretending to love you? Pay attention to how much your emotional state matters to them. If there have been instances where you’re bawling your eyes out because you’re hurt by something your partner said and they refuse to even acknowledge that you’re hurting, you’re relationship is about as real as a sandcastle.
Related Reading: Why Do Fights Become More Important Than Relationships?
11. Being ignored
One of the signs of fake love from a man is when he chooses to ignore you during times of crisis. And if a girl is faking her love for you, she will be completely unmoved by your troubles and woes. During your low days or difficult phases, a fake relationship will never give you the comfort you need.
There will be a complete lack of concern on the part of your significant other. You might be left feeling alone and at the disposal of your own strength during trying times.
12. Being very flippant when it comes to making plans
In fake relationships, your partner may not take your plans or schedules seriously. They will take your decisions very lightly and instead choose to do as they please, depending on their own whims. Their moods will drive their actions instead of respect for you. For example, you may be planning a trip for months but they might change their mind about it depending on their own circumstances.
In a fake relationship, the other person will never respect the effort you put into spending time with them. When she no longer cares or he couldn’t be bothered about your feelings and expectations and this lack of concern becomes apparent, there is no denying that you’re in a fake relationship.
13. Forgetting things happens more often in fake relationships
“Sorry, I forgot to call you back,” or “Hey, I forgot to bring the wine,” are words you might often hear. When one is emotionally less invested, it is natural that you will be on their mind less often. They might keep forgetting things you tell them about yourself, ask them to do or discuss with them.
“Oops, it just slipped my mind,” is actually a euphemism for “I don’t think about you that much at all.” You become an after-thought when a woman is pretending to love you or a man is faking his feelings. Recognize not feeling important in a relationship for what it is: one of the biggest signs that she is not in love with you or he never loved you to begin with.
14. There is a lot of mention of their ex
The scariest feature of the fake relationship drama is the fact that perhaps you might just be an easy rebound. In such a case, your partner might talk about their ex often. Worse, if they compare you to them. That is your cue to run. Their feelings are clearly dominated by someone else.
Do not fall into this trap of being used by someone while they are still clearly in love with someone else. This fake relationship is only helping them stay distracted because they are still not over their ex.
15. Sneaky little white lies
In fake relationships, your partner will lie to you more often. It could be about themselves to make them appear more winsome than they actually are. They might want to boast and seem rich and successful instead of sharing their realities. They may also lie about not being able to make it to a party or being too busy to spend time with you.
From white lies to sneaky deceit, a lack of honesty and transparency is among the tell-tale signs she is pretending to love you or he has no real feeling for you.
How To End A Fake Relationship?
It is clear from the above points that fake relationships are nothing short of toxic. If you have noticed that you might be in one, there is simply no reason for you to continue being in one. It is time to acknowledge the signs she is pretending to love you or he is with you just because you serve a need he may have. Once you do, follow these steps to get rid of a fake boyfriend or girlfriend and hop off the misleading train of love.
1. Sit down and have a chat
When you see that a woman is pretending to love you or a man is faking his feelings, it is important to lay all your cards on the table and encourage your partner to do the same. Openly communicate with them all the ways you think the relationship has been fake and what you would rather expect from them. If they refuse to change, you have your answer and there is no reason to give further chances. Such relationships are just not worth saving.
2. Do not let their rationale soften you
To avoid losing the comfort you provide them, he will continue to show signs he loves you or she will do her best to hide the signs she is pretending to love you. They will constantly bring up old incidents and things they said to remind you that they love you. Yet, you have come to a conclusion about the relationship for a reason. Do not allow them to disrespect you further and just do not fall for it.
Related Reading: 15 Clever Ways to Turn Down An Ex Who Wants To Be Friends
3. Do not try to be friends
Take some time off to deal with the heartbreak and spend time with yourself. If you continue being part of their lives, they will further take you for granted. Just let it go and stay firm in your decision. You are so much better than that. They might still leech onto you and use you for their own comforts. It is your job to turn them down and put your emotions first.
4. Use this opportunity to further build your self-esteem
Realizing that you do not deserve to be treated as a side dish is only the first step of this journey. Further on, comes a time of deep introspection and reorganization of who you want to be and what you truly deserve. Surviving heartbreak should be your sole concern and is the most important step of the journey. It can be one hell of a process, in a good way! When you are in a better space, there are chances you won’t be lured into fake relationships again.
5. Enjoy the freedom
When you lose something you never had, it was never that big of a loss in the first place. It is actually more of a win since you will not be wasting any more time or energy on someone that did not deserve you. Enjoy this taste of freedom, get out there, and find somebody real to invest your efforts into. The world is your oyster!
Now that you know exactly how to tell if someone is pretending to love you and deal with the situation, do not allow your fake partner from the fake relationship to string you along. Severe the ties, reclaim control of your life, take this unpleasant experience as a lesson and move on. If you’re struggling with feelings of betrayal and finding it hard to trust people after having been in a fake relationship, know that you’re not alone.
Trust issues are common and can be handled with the help of a skilled expert. Bonobology counselors have helped many people lead better lives through online counseling and you could avail it too.
A fake relationship is one with the glowing appearance of a happy, loving one. It has the illusion of two devout partners who seem to genuinely try to make the relationship work. Yet, their feelings are not completely in alignment with their words and actions.
In fake love, there is very little romance. You can forget the grand gestures, the plans about the future, the care and concern and the introduction to parents. What you get is sex with no pillow talk or cuddling, dry conversations and frequent fights.
You can tell when someone is faking love when all the showing is done on Social Media or in front of friends. When you two are alone they are usually engrossed in their own world and have no time for you.
Just have a talk and let them know that you cannot deal with this fake relationship anymore and would want to go for a genuine one in the future. There is no need to be heartbroken, instead, you should enjoy your newfound freedom.