The Long-distance Marriage Of Bheem And Hidimba

Spirituality and Mythology | |
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When Hidimba saw Bheem, it was love at first sight. But how and when did Bheem marry Hidimba? The fabled love story between a warrior and a demoness features in the Mahabharat right after the Lakshagriha incident. The Pandavas, along with their mother Kunti, were spending their days in a forest where the demon Hidimb attacked them one night. Bheem put up a brave fight, and with a little help from Hidimba managed to kill the demon. His courage and strength instantly attracted the demoness to Bheem.

An Unconventional Bond Between Bheem And Hidimba

Bheem and Hidimba were married soon after this incident and the alliance had the approval of the Pandavas. Thus, Hidimba became the first daughter-in-law of Kunti and Pandu vansh. Comparatively, Dwapar Yug was more liberal and less stereotyped. Hidimba unhesitant, expressed her desire to marry Bheem.

To win his trust, and to assure him of her love and intentions, she even helped Bheem protect his family from her demon brother Hidimb.

With her guidance, he was able to kill him. Convinced about her feelings, Kunti and the Pandavas blessed their marriage. The unconventional wedlock was approved with a few conditions – that the demoness will not join the clan back in Indraprast but stay back at the Kamyaka forest. She would neither stake her claim as the queen nor would her offspring be liable as an heir to the throne.

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A long-distance marriage

Hidimba knew she would never enjoy a conventional married life, living under the same roof with her husband. But all she wanted was Bheem’s love, and so she agreed to the conditions. Like the contemporary times, though inconvenient, long-distance marriages existed and thrived centuries back too.

Why Bheem left Hidimba?

The romantic honeymoon period of their marriage lasted only for a year. Having seen the face of his son Ghatotkach, Bheem announced it was time for them to part. The time had come for the Pandavas to carry on with their journey and that’s why Bheem left Hidimba.

With a heavy heart, Hidimba and Bheem promised to love each other until the end. Hidimba stayed back to raise a worthy son and take care of the forest and people of Kamyaka whereas Bheem, along with his brothers, embarked on the journey to win back their honor and empire.

Making a long-distance marriage stand the test of time

So how did this long-distance marriage manage to survive the test of time and circumstances? Hidimba was a demoness blessed with supernatural powers. Every once in a while, when Bheem was reachable, she would fly to him. And together they would go off to far lands. She would carry him to celestial places.

They would fill their hearts with memories.

During their time together, Bheem would assure her of his love. In the truest words, he meant when he said, “You are my first wedded wife. Your place shall always be special. It can never be replaced.” And Hidimba would believe every word he spoke.

Bheem and Hidimba’s son strengthened their bond

During their exile years, Bheem visited the Kamyaka forest and stayed for days. This was the only opportunity for Bheem and Hidimba’s son, Ghatotkach, had to bond with his father, uncles and grandmother. “Will you teach how to master the mace, father?” he’d ask and Bheem would proudly comply.

Ghatotkach was a combined dream that Bheem and Hidimba lived and shared. He was a symbol of their love.

Bheem often praised her, “You are a very diligent and loving mother. I can see our son is strong and responsible. Now, begin his training in warfare skills. When I return to Indraprast, I will train him in mace fight. It shall be a proud moment when he defeats me.”

Hidimba would lovingly, follow his guidelines and raise their son in the manner befitting a prince.

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A hint of jealousy

When Bheem married Draupadi, and visited Hidimba along with her, the emotions of jealousy and insecurity were natural. She lamented and spewed anger.

“Is your love for me over now? She is very beautiful. Your rightful queen!”

And empathetic Bheem reassured her, “There can’t be any comparisons my dear. She has her place, and you yours. Love doesn’t end like this. And you were aware of the unconventional nature of our marriage right from the beginning. Besides, you already are the queen of Kamyaka. You do not need me to make you a queen. You are far more superior. Isn’t it?”

Eased by his words, Hidimba settled down. She reminded herself to focus on their love and son, and not get affected by her husband’s relationships outside of their nuptial bond. Bheem and Hidimba made their long-distance marriage work, thanks to their strong faith in each other.

Whenever they were haunted by doubts, they reassured and reminded themselves of the conditions they had discussed before getting into the wedlock. Like a mature couple, they gave each other liberty to practice and seek their individual goals yet come together when life allowed them to, particularly in raising their son, Ghatotkach. With faith and trust as the cornerstones, their long-distance marriage stood the test of time.

Related Reading: Draupadi and Krishna – Was It Platonic Love?

The Concept of Long Distance Marriages Endures

This wedded setup is quite common in contemporary society as well. Couples live in separate homes and different cities. Married, yet living separately to fulfil their individual goals and purposes. They are united, merged with love yet they balance their individual goals and support each other’s as well.

Unlike the couples living under the same roof, those in a long-distance marriage meet at intervals and still pick up from where they had left. Distance doesn’t mar their feelings or affect the bonding. Together they find ways to keep in touch, keep the spark alive and above all learn to ward off temptations of straying.

Even though they don’t have their partner by their side all the time, they don’t let distance weaken their relationship.

They learn to manage their insecurity, and at times suspicions. In those times, a demoness relied on her supernatural powers to reach her beloved, today couples use technology to stay connected. The virtual world keeps them close, if not tangibly at least emotionally.

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