You can help a partner fighting addiction
We can’t decide what’s more unfortunate – the fact that a staggering portion of the country falls prey to substance abuse and addiction or that this is a problem that’s brushed under the carpet. We’re all familiar with how horrible an addiction to drugs can be to the individual; but what happens when the addict is in a relationship? If you thought that your addictions and their effects were contained within yourself, you were wrong! Thanks to drugs, countless relationships are ruined every day. But what do you do when your partner is an addict? Well, it’s time we addressed that.
First things first: addicts are not beyond our help. And yes, there are things that you, as a partner, can do to make life easier for them! That said, this isn’t a walk in the park. It involves coming up with a plan, being disciplined, and – most importantly – patient. We don’t want you to go through your partner hotboxing the room every day, selling furniture to buy drugs, and making you feel guilty for their state. So, without further ado, here are 7 ways in which you can help you addicted lover fight the war against drugs!
Acknowledge the issue
Believe it or not, the first step in trying to help your partner get over those dreadful pills and bottles is to acknowledge that there is indeed an issue. This might seem like an obvious step, but in a country like ours where drug abuse is associated with so much social stigma, this becomes a herculean task! Turn your back on those curious relatives and nosy neighbours – this is between you and your loved one. Once you admit that there’s a problem, it’s much easier to find a solution.
Once you admit that there’s a problem, it’s much easier to find a solution.
Do your research
We’re sure you know someone who gasps every time you talk to them about smoking or drinking. To them, the definition of a drug is simple – it’s the tool that wipes all sanskar off you! Don’t be part of that group. Instead, learn more about your partner’s drug to learn know the specific ways in which you can help them! And if you know that something’s up, but they won’t confide in you, try looking up their signs to have an idea of what you’re dealing with.
Addicts tend to be secretive about these guilty pleasures and often regard questions thrown at them as interrogation. Thankfully, you – the partner he loves – have an edge here! So, we suggest you use it to help them understand what they want. How bad is it? Do they want to quit? And if they do, are they prepared to do what’s necessary? Since stressful situations can make them want to resort to drugs, we suggest you comfort them physically throughout the discussion.
Related reading: My husband is addicted to gaming and it’s killing our relationship
While we want you to be gentle and kind, something you shouldn’t do is enable. It might be an uncomfortable question, but ask yourself if you can trust your partner! Addicts tend to master the art of manipulation to get what they crave. So, if they’ve been asking for money or selling your stuff, you need to stop! And while, in their worst moments of withdrawal, it might be tempting to let them have a hit just to see them relaxed again, trust us: you do not want to do that!
Do not be violent
We get it. Of course, you have a breaking point, too. But in dealing with your partner’s battle with addiction, you need to keep calm. Addicts lie, break promises, and do anything they can to get another hit. But patience is your weapon, comrade! Violence will probably incite more violence, and that isn’t the best idea when you’re dealing with a person under the influence. And if you have children, that’s the last thing they need to see!
Get medical help
Does being unable to help them makes you feel inadequate? We want you to know that you are not at fault, and that you should seek medical help. This may seem an obvious option, but it’s one of the more reliable ones. Although the fear of being judged makes many try to skirt around this, isn’t it better to be judged than watch your partner suffer?
Related reading: 7 people share the worst things their marriages have ever survived
Take care of yourself
Love makes people do strange things, but you need to know where to draw the line. If your partner isn’t willing to quit, don’t be afraid to consider leaving them. Also, know that you can’t possibly help them by being a punchbag for their abusive behaviour! This’ll help them prevent unintentionally causing their loved ones harm.
While these ways are by no means easy, know that the war against drugs can be won. And you’re not as helpless or incapable as you think you are!