Izimpawu Eziyi-15 Zokuthi Umkakho Akakuhloniphi (Nendlela Okufanele Ubhekane Ngayo Nakho)

Cabanga ngalokhu: Umkakho akanandaba nezinto ozithandayo. Ukuphoqa ukuthi ubuke amafilimu, udle, noma uhambe ohambweni, konke ngokuthanda kwakhe nangokuthanda kwakhe. Akakuvumeli ukuthi uhlangane nabangane bakho futhi uvame ukuhlekisa ngawe esidlangalaleni. Siyaxolisa ukukuphula mngani wami, kodwa mhlampe ubhekene nonkosikazi ongahloniphi.

Ukulondoloza ubuhlobo obunempilo nobujabulisayo ngemva komshado akuyona ikhekhe. Ngokuvamile, imibhangqwana iqala ukuthathana kalula njengoba ixazulule futhi ikhululekile ebuhlotsheni. Kodwa uma, kuleyo nqubo, abalingani belahlekelwa inhlonipho ngomunye nomunye, kungase kube nzima ukugcina ubuhlobo ngokuhamba kwesikhathi.

Ngakho-ke, kufanele usukume uphikisane nomkakho, lapho uqala ukubona izimpawu zokungahloniphi. Wonke ama-jibe, wonke amazwi ahlabayo, nawo wonke ama-photshot akhuluma ngawe ngeke nje aqede ukuzethemba kwakho kodwa futhi abhekane namandla esibopho sakho somshado. Esimweni esinjalo, kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuthi ungabhekana kanjani nomfazi ongahloniphi futhi uzivikele (futhi mhlawumbe nomshado wakho, uma izinkinga zingadeli kakhulu). Ukuze wenze lokho, ake sibheke izimpawu zokuthi umkakho akakuhloniphi namacebiso ambalwa okuthi ungabhekana kanjani nesimo.

Ubani Umfazi Ongenanhlonipho?

Ngaphambi kokuthola indlela yokusebenzelana nenkosikazi edelelayo, kufanele wazi ukuthi ungayikhomba kanjani. Emshadweni, umngane womshado ngamunye angase alimaze omunye, nakuba engaqondile. Esikushoyo ukuthi ukuphawula kwakho ngokuthi ukhuluphele noma wenza ihlaya ngawe emcimbini akusho ukuthi ubefisa ukukudelela.

Ukuze kuthiwe awuhloniphi, kumele kube nomkhuba wokuziphatha okulimazayo. Lapho abafazi bengahloniphi amadoda, baba nobugovu ebudlelwaneni babo futhi bangazinaki izidingo, izifiso, kanye nemibono yabalingani babo. Ngamanye amazwi, ababonisi inhlonipho ngokuzethemba kwakho.

Umsebenzisi we-Reddit uxoxa ngesipiliyoni sakhe sokubhekana nomfazi ongahloniphi: “Namuhla ekuseni, njengoba besilungiselela ukuya emsebenzini, umkami wayefuna ukuboleka izinto zami ezimbalwa. Ngamvumela kodwa ngaqaphela ngemva kwemizuzu embalwa ukuthi enye yezinto yayiyinto engiyidingayo mina ngalolo suku. Ngamazisa futhi ngamnikeza into efanayo kakhulu eyayizosebenzela izidingo zakhe.

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Indlela Ukusho Izinto Ezilimazayo Ebudlelwaneni Okukuthinta Ngayo

“Wala, wenqaba, wacasuka, wanquma ukungayiboleki nhlobo into yami. Izwi lakhe laphakama kimina ezwakalisa ukucikeka kwakhe ngokuthi ngeke ngimvumele asebenzise enye yezinto zami ayezifuna. Wavele wathula wagodla uthando nokuqabula ngaphambi kokuba aphume ngomnyango.” Njengoba usuyazi ukuthi injani inkosikazi edelela umyeni wayo, ake sibheke izimpawu ezibonisa ukuthi akanandaba nawe.

15 Izimpawu Umkakho Akakuhloniphi

Abafazi bavame ukungabahloniphi abayeni babo uma bazi ukuthi bazosinda futhi abalingani babo ngeke bazivikele. Isimo singaba sibi kakhulu uma indoda inomfazi okhohlisayo , othanda ukudlala imidlalo yengqondo ukuze athole okufunwa yiyo njalo. Okudingeka ukwenze ezimweni ezinjalo ukuhoxisa ngesikhathi esifanele, ubeke imingcele, uqinisekise ukuthi akadluli, bese ekhuluma ngokuziphatha kwakhe kokungahloniphi.

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izimpawu Eziyi-13 Zokuthi Akakuhloniphi Futhi Akakufanelekeli

Kodwa-ke, ngaphandle kokuthi wazi izimpawu zokulahlekelwa yinhlonipho ebudlelwaneni, ngeke ukwazi ukusiza umkakho ukuthi athuthuke futhi ngeke ukwazi ukusindisa ubudlelwano benu. Nakhu okwashiwo umsebenzisi we-Reddit ngezimpawu aziqaphelayo lapho ebhekene nowesifazane ongahloniphi: “Uma engithukuthelele uzokhumula indandatho yakhe yomshado. Unamathela ezinganeni ngaphezu kwami. Uhlala phezulu esikhundleni sokuhlala phansi nami.”

Lezi ezinye zezimpawu ezicacile zokungahloniphi emshadweni. Ake sibheke ezinye izimpawu eziyi-15 ezifana nalezi ukuthi umkakho akakuhloniphi:

1. Uyakugcona noma uyakuthuka

Okunye okutshengisa ukuthi umkakho akakuhloniphi yikuthi uyakuchothoza phambi kwabantu njalo uzijabulisa ngemali yakho. Yiqiniso, i-jibe noma ihlaya ngezikhathi ezithile ngezindleko zakho zingabekezelelwa, ngisho noma ungakujabuleli. Nokho, qaphela lawa mafulegi abomvu:

• Uvame ukuhlekisa ngawe phambi kwabangane bakhe noma umndeni wakhe
• Usebenzisa izimpikiswano zakho zangasese ukuze akuhlaze esidlangalaleni

Ukuhlukumeza ngamazwi kungalimaza kakhulu impilo yengqondo yomuntu . Ngalokhu, isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo uNeha Anand sithi, ukuhlukumeza ngamazwi “kungahlanganiswa nehlaya elibi. Ngokungafani nokuhlukumeza ngokomzimba, akushiyi imivimbo ebonakalayo noma amathambo aphukile, kodwa kungahlupha kakhulu futhi kube buhlungu ngendlela efanayo.” Ukungahloniphi okunjalo komkakho nakho kuyakhathaza ngokomzwelo. Ungazizwa ucindezelekile futhi uzehlukanise ngenxa yalokhu.

2. Uhlale ekhononda

Ingabe uvame ukuzizwa, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi wenzani, umkakho akabonakali anelisekile noma ejabule? Umkakho uvame ukukukhathaza ukuze ube umuntu ongcono futhi akhononde ngezinto okungafanele ngisho nokuba semqoka kwasekuqaleni. Isibonelo,

• Akanelisekile ngephakethe lakho lokuhola
• Uyayigxeka indlela obukeka ngayo
• Akaneme ngabangane onabo

Kube sengathi akukho okwenzayo okumlungele. Lezi yizimpawu zomfazi ongahloniphi.

3. Akakulaleli

Uma umkakho engasakuhloniphi, kungenzeka angabe esakwazi ngisho nokukulalela. Ezimweni ezinjalo, inkosikazi edelela umyeni wayo:

• Angase anikeze izaba zokugwema ukukhuluma naye
• Angase ashaye umyeni wakhe ngamatshe noma amnike ukwelashwa buthule izinsuku, amasonto, noma ngisho izinyanga
• Angase abonakale ephazamisekile lapho umyeni wakhe ezama ukukhuluma naye futhi angase angabi nasithakazelo sokuzwa ngokunqoba kwakhe noma ukulwa kwakhe.

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Ingabe Ukuhlukunyezwa Kwezindonga Zamatshe? Ungabhekana Kanjani Nodonga Lwezindonga Lwemizwa?

4. Uyayigwema imithwalo yakhe yemfanelo

Olunye lwezimpawu zomfazi ongahloniphi ukuthi ngeke enze noma yimuphi umzamo wokuhlanganyela imithwalo yemfanelo yasekhaya. Khumbula, uma abantu ababili bengalingani ngokulinganayo emisebenzini yasekhaya nakweminye imithwalo yemfanelo, umshado ungaba nzima!

UStuart, engisebenza naye, wabhekana nesimo esifanayo futhi wake wangibuza ngokudabukisayo, “Umkami akangihloniphi, kufanele ngimhlukanise?” UmkaStuart akagcinanga nje ngokwehluleka ukuthatha unina ogulayo aye kudokotela ngesikhathi ehambile ohambweni kodwa futhi wadala idrama enkulu lapho ebuzwa ngezindlela zakhe zokunganaki. Ngakho-ke, uyabona, umfazi ongahloniphi umyeni wakhe akanakuba ngumlingani wokuphila kwakhe ngobuqotho beqiniso.

5. Ugcina izimfihlo kuwe

Esinye sezibonakaliso ezicacile zokuthi umkakho akakuhloniphi yilapho efihla izinto, ezinkulu nezincane, kuwe. Emshadweni, bobabili abashadile kufanele bazi ngempilo yomunye nomunye futhi kulindeleke ukuthi babelane ngamaphupho abo kanye nokwehluleka kwabo. Kodwa-ke, uma umkakho ekugcina izimfihlo ngempilo yakhe futhi wena wazi ngazo komunye umuntu, ungawushayi indiva lo mkhombandlela. Izindlela zakhe zokufihla zingenye yezimpawu eziyinhloko zokungahloniphi ebudlelwaneni benu.

6. Udlala ngothando kwabanye phambi kwakho

Esinye sezibonakaliso ezinkulu zokungahloniphi yilapho iqiniso lokuthi ushadile nawe lingamvimbeli ukuthi adlale nabanye. Ngezinye izikhathi, phambi kwakho. Lokhu kusho ukuthi imizwa yakho ayisabalulekile kuye. Lapho ukudlala okunjalo kungabi nempilo futhi umkakho eveza isithakazelo sakhe kwamanye amadoda ngokungenamahloni, kungaba yinto ehlambalazayo kakhulu kuwe. Ngakho-ke, angase adlale noweta ngesikhathi nisebusuku bokuqomisana noma nomunye wabasebenzi bakho ephathini lasehhovisi. Lokhu kungase kukushiye uzibuza, “Umkami akangihloniphi, kufanele ngimshiye?”

7. Akaselona uhlelo lwakho lokusekela

Umlingani wakho ungumuntu okufanele ame eceleni kwakho futhi abe yidwala lakho, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kwenzekani. Kodwa-ke, uma engakusekeli noma engakusizi ngezikhathi zobunzima, kungenye yezimpawu ezisobala kakhulu zokuthi umkakho akakuhloniphi. Ukuhlasela kwakhe okukugconayo, okugcona, nokukuhlambalaza kungaqhubeka ngaphandle kokuphazamiseka ezimweni ezinjalo, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ubhekene nani. Uma ufuna izimpawu ezicacile zokuthi umkakho akakuhloniphi futhi ekuthatha kalula , zibuze ukuthi ungaba sengozini yini phambi kwakhe. Khuluma ngokwehluleka kwamuva nje bese ubona ukuthi uyakududuza noma uyakugcona.

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izisekelo Eziyi-7 Zokusekela Ebudlelwaneni

8. Uba kude ngokomzimba

Lapho umkakho eqala ukungakunaki izidingo zakho zocansi, cishe useqalile ukungakuhloniphi njengomuntu. Ezimweni ezinjalo, ungase uzithole ubhajwe emshadweni ongenabo ucansi kodwa unamathele kuye ngokomzwelo. Umngane wami, uKevin, wazithola esesimweni esifanayo lapho umkakhe engamvumeli ngisho nokuthi amange noma amange. Futhi njalo lapho eqala ucansi, wayeba 'nekhanda elibuhlungu' noma 'azizwe elele'. Ekugcineni waqaphela ukuthi wayengasenaso inhlonipho ngezidingo zakhe zomzimba.

9. Akazimisele ukuyekethisa

Noma yibuphi ubudlelwano besikhathi eside budinga ukuyekethisa nokulungiswa okuvela kubo bobabili abalingani. Kodwa-ke, kumfazi ongahloniphi umyeni wakhe, ukuyeka ukuma kwakhe noma ukuthola indawo ephakathi yokuxazulula ukungezwani akuyona ngisho nenketho. Kuhlala 'kuyindlela yami noma umgwaqo omkhulu' kuye. Ezimweni ezinjalo, ukushiswa kobudlelwano kungase kube sekhoneni. Lokhu futhi kungenye yezimpawu ezisobala zokuntuleka kwenhlonipho emshadweni.

Ngokwesibonelo, umakhelwane wami, uHelen, wayengazimisele ukushintsha indlela asebenzisa ngayo imali lapho lo mbhangqwana ubhekene nenkinga yezimali. Wayesazodla ezindaweni zokudlela ezibizayo futhi athenge nezimpahla zophawu. Kodwa wayelindele ukuthi umyeni wakhe, uCalvin, ayeke ukuba yilungu lejimi futhi achithe imali encane ezimpahleni nasekuzilungiseni.

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: I-Empath Vs I-Narcissist - Ubudlelwano Obuyingozi Phakathi Kwe-Empath Ne-Narcissist

10. Awuseyona into ehamba phambili kuye

Umzala wami, uLogan, wazithola edabukile lapho umkakhe, u-Ashley, enquma ukuthatha uhambo neqembu lakhe lamantombazane ngalo kanye usuku abuya ngalo ekhaya evela ohambweni lomsebenzi olwathatha amasonto amathathu. Futhi lokho futhi, ngosuku lwabo lwesikhumbuzo. Lapho ezwakalisa ukungenami kwakhe ku-Ashley, u-Ashley waphendula ngokuthi wayekhohliwe ngosuku lwesikhumbuzo nokuthi uhambo lwase lukhokhelwe kakade.

Nokho, lesi yisibonelo lapho indoda yayingene kakhulu ohlwini lomfazi lwezinto eziza kuqala kangangokuthi injabulo yakhe yayingabalulekile kuye. Ngokusobala, izidingo zakhe ezingokomzwelo ebuhlotsheni zazihlala zinganakwa, zinganakwa, futhi zingahlangatshezwanga ngamabomu. Ngamanye amazwi, lokhu kwakuyindaba yokuhlukunyezwa ngokomzwelo. Uma lesi kuyisimo ongasiqonda, akukho kungabaza ngokuthi umkakho akahloniphi nokuthi intshisekelo yakho ayibalulekile kuye.

11. Uhlale ekubukela phansi

Enye yezimpawu zokuntula inhlonipho emshadweni yilapho ezimisele ngokukudicilela phansi kuzo zonke izinyathelo. Nazi ezinye zezibonelo ezinjalo:

• Umcela ukuthi angakhulumi ngezindaba zakho zangasese esidlangalaleni, ungaqiniseka ukuthi iyona kanye indlela azokwenza ngayo ngakusasa.
• Utshela izingane ukuthi ziqedele ukudla noma zilungiselele ukulala, futhi uzokudlula futhi azivumele zenze umathanda.

Ekugcineni, kuzofika lapho ungeke ube nazwi ekhaya lakho. Lesi ngesinye sezimpawu zomfazi ongahloniphi.

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Ingabe Ukunganaki Noma Ukungahloniphi Kufana Nokukhohlisa Oshade Naye?

12. Ukwehlisa isithunzi ezinkundleni zokuxhumana

Umkakho akahloniphi nhlobo uma engabonisi inhlonipho eyisisekelo kuwe ezinkundleni zokuxhumana. Kulezi zinsuku, lapho izinkundla zokuxhumana zithinta kakhulu ubudlelwano bethu, noma yiluphi uhlobo lokuwohloka ezinkundleni zokuxhumana lufana nokuhlukumeza noma ukungahloniphi. Ngakho-ke, angase:

• Dlala ngothando esidlangalaleni nabanye ku-Facebook noma ku-Instagram
• Thumela amazwibela angaqondile noma amazwi ahlabayo mayelana nezindaba zakho zomuntu siqu, okukwenza ubonakale njengesikhohlakali
• Joyina izandla nabangani ukuze bakuhlekise ku-inthanethi

13. Uyaqhathanisa njalo

Esinye sezibonakaliso ezisobala zokuntuleka kwenhlonipho emshadweni kungaba ukuqhathanisa njalo, okukubeka ngaphansi kwezindinganiso ezithile ezicatshangwayo futhi kukwenze uzizwe ungelutho. Ngakho-ke, angaba:

• Ukukuqhathanisa namasoka akhe angaphambili: Lokhu kungaba mayelana nokubukeka, imisebenzi, noma ukusebenza kocansi
• Ukuqhathanisa ubudlelwano bakho nobangane bakhe: Lokhu kungase kuhlanganise ukuqhathanisa mayelana nesimo noma izingane, isibonelo, ukuthi izingane zabo zifunda ezikoleni ezingcono kunezakho noma ziya eholidini elibiza kakhulu.

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Ugibe Lokuqhathanisa - Kuyini Futhi Ungaphuma Kanjani

14 Wenza imali ibe indaba enkulu ezingxabanweni

Ngokuvamile, ebudlelwaneni, ezezimali zingaba yimbangela yokuphazamiseka kwezezimali. Izinkinga zemali , njengokuba omunye umlingani ehola kakhulu kunomunye, zingaholela ezingxabanweni ezinkulu. Futhi imali ingaba yimbangela enkulu yokungahloniphi. Qaphela lezi zimpawu uma uzibuza ukuthi umkakho akakuhloniphi yini:

• Uyakugcona ngokuthi uhola kancane
• Uthenga okumba eqolo esebenzisa ikhadi lakho lesikweletu kodwa akakutsheli ngakho uze umbuze
• Akavezi izindleko ezinkulu zezimali, njengokubhaliselwe ejimini okumba eqolo noma ukuthenga okusezingeni eliphezulu.

15. Akanandaba nemingcele yakho

Esinye sezibonakaliso ezibaluleke kakhulu zokuthi akakuhloniphi yilapho uzizwa sengathi awunayo imingcele enempilo . Ngakho-ke, ezimweni ezinjalo, angase:

• Afonele abangani bakhe ngaphandle kokukubuza ukuthi ukahle yini ngakho
• Ngena egumbini lakho bese uvula i-TV uma ulele noma usebenza kukhompuyutha ephathekayo yakho
• Oda ukudla akukhethile ngaphandle kokubuza ukuthi yini ongathanda ukuba nayo

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izibonelo Eziyi-9 Zemingcele Yemizwa Ebudlelwaneni

Kungani Umkami Engangihloniphi?

Njengoba usubonile ukuthi umfazi ongahloniphi umyeni wakhe uziphatha kanjani, sekuyisikhathi sokucabanga ukuthi iyini imbangela yalokho kungahloniphi ngoba lokho kuzokuthatha isinyathelo esisodwa eduze nokuqonda ukuthi ungaya kanjani ebudlelwaneni obunempilo . Kuphela uma usuqonda ukuthi yonke intukuthelo yakhe ivelaphi, lapho uzokwazi ukugxila ekususeni inkinga emsukeni wayo. Uma imibuzo noma ukukhathazeka okufana nokuthi “Kungani umkami engiphatha kabi kangaka?” noma “Angiqondi ukuthi kungani nginomlingani ongahloniphi” bekulokhu kukukhathaza, ungase ufune ukucabangela lezi zizathu ezilandelayo:

1. Akaneme ngesimo sakho sezezimali

Ezimweni eziningi, amakhosikazi awahloniphi abayeni ngenxa yokucasuka okuhlobene nezindaba zezimali. Ezimweni ezinjalo:

• Angase anganeliseki ngesimo sakho sezimali
• Angase afune ukuthi ube nesifiso sokuvelela
• Angase afune ukuthi unciphise izindleko ezingadingekile
• Angase afune ukuthi ugxile ekuhleleni imali esikhathini esizayo ukuze uthenge imoto noma indlu

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izindlela Ezi-8 Zokulwa Ngenhlonipho Nomlingani Wakho

2. Akajabule ngempilo yakho yocansi

Isizathu esivamile sokuba umfazi angahloniphi ukuthi usephumile emshadweni ngenxa yempilo embi yocansi. Uma ungamjabulisi embhedeni ngendlela owawuyijabulela ngayo, ngokwemvelo uzoqala ukungahloniphi, njengoba esesemshadweni angazizwa anelisekile kuwo. Kungenzeka ukuthi uthandana nomuntu , ngokwazi kwakho konke.

3. Awumhloniphi

Indoda engamhloniphi umfazi ngokwemvelo iyozala inkosikazi engenanhlonipho. Uma ubulokhu uzibuza imibuzo enjengokuthi, “Kungani umkami engiphatha kabi kangaka?”, mhlawumbe, ungase udinge ukubuza kancane ngokuziphatha kwakho futhi. Zama futhi uphendule imibuzo efana nalena:

• Ingabe udelela umlingani wakho nganoma iyiphi indlela?
• Ingabe wayecabanga ukuthi udelele kuye noma ungazami ukudelela?

Ngezinye izikhathi, uyinkinga ebudlelwaneni bakho . Kodwa-ke, isinyathelo sokuqala sokwelapha ukuqaphela izinto ezinzima kangaka.

4. Unezinkinga ezingakaxazululwa

Uma elwa namademoni akhe futhi impilo yakhe yengqondo iphazamisekile ngenxa yezinkinga ezingaxazululwanga kanye nobuhlungu bomshado obudlule , angase akukhiphele kuwe ngokungahloniphi. Isibonelo, umuntu ongazethembi uvame ukubukisa ukungazethembi kwakhe kumlingani wakhe, okumenza azizwe ecindezekile. Ngakho-ke, kungenzeka ukuthi:

• Abazali bakhe bamenza wazizwa engalondekile esemncane
• Wayethukwa noma ehlukunyezwa umlingani wangaphambili
• Kungenzeka ukuthi usenezinkinga zempilo yengqondo ngenxa yokuhlukunyezwa omunye umuntu ngaphandle kwabazali bakhe noma owayengumlingani wakhe

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izimpawu Eziyi-11 Zokuthi Usemshadweni Oxhomeke Kumuntu Oyedwa

5. Izidingo zakhe ezingokomzwelo azinakekelwa

Esinye sezizathu okungenzeka ukuthi kungani angakuhloniphi kungaba ukuthi izidingo zakhe ezingokomzwelo azigcwaliseki. Ngakho-ke, kungenzeka ukuthi uzithole ubanda futhi awumphenduli ngesikhathi ekudinga kakhulu. Ezikhathini ezinzima kakhulu empilweni, ihlombe umuntu alifuna kakhulu. Futhi indoda engamhloniphi umkayo ayisoze yalindela ukuboniswa uthando ngaphandle kokuba ilungise izindlela zayo.

Izindlela Eziyisi-7 Zokubhekana Nomfazi Ongenanhlonipho

Uzibuza ukuthi ungenza kanjani umkakho akuhloniphe? Ungawusindisa ngempela umshado ophukile lapho umfazi engamhloniphi umyeni wakhe? Ukuphatha umfazi ongahloniphi kungase kungabi lula ukubhekana nesimo. Phela, ukukhetha phakathi komshado wakho nokuzihlonipha akuyona isinqumo esilula okufanele usithathe. Kodwa-ke, akudingeki kube yisimo sokukhetha noma yikuphi. Mhlawumbe ningathatha isinyathelo sokwelapha njengombhangqwana. Sithemba ukuthi nizothuthuka ngalezi zindlela eziyisikhombisa:

1. Ungathukutheli

Uma uhlala uzitshela ukuthi, “Umkami akahloniphi futhi kuyangithukuthelisa kakhulu,” siyakuzwa. Uyabona, noma ngabe umkakho uvame ukukuhlukumeza ngamazwi noma eziphatha kabi, udinga ukukhumbula ukuthi yimizwa yakho kuphela ongayilawula, hhayi eyakhe.

Ngakho-ke, zama konke okusemandleni akho ukuthi ungacasuki noma uphindisele ngokuqhulula. Ukusabela kabi kuzokwenza kuphela ubudlelwano bakho bube mahle futhi kudale izinkinga ezengeziwe. Ngakho-ke, esikhundleni salokho, zijwayeze ukuzibamba futhi ugcine isibambo semizwa yakho lapho eyakhe igijima. Lesi yisinyathelo sokuqala sokubhekana nonkosikazi ongahloniphi.

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Ukubaluleka Kwenhlonipho Ebudlelwaneni

2. Khulumisanani

Ukuphela kwendlela yokuthola imbangela yalolu hlobo lokuziphatha iwukuxhumana okusebenzayo nokuvulekile . Nakhu ongakwenza:

• Khuluma naye ngesimo sengqondo esifanele, ngendlela ezolile
• Khetha isikhathi nendawo efanele yokukhuluma nomkakho ngokuziphatha kwakhe. Qiniseka ukuthi isilungiselelo asiphazamiseki
• Iba nengxoxo evulekile, ngaphandle komdlalo wokusola
• Sebenzisa amakhono athile okuxazulula izingxabano. Mbuze ukuthi yini engalungile futhi umnikeze isandla ukuze umsize athuthukise ukuziphatha kwakhe okudelelayo

Thola ukuthi yiziphi izinkinga zobudlelwane ezingaxazululiwe noma imizwa yokucasuka emenza aziphathe ngale ndlela. Qiniseka ukuthi akuwena obangela ukuthi aziphathe ngale ndlela.

3. Mnikeze indawo yomuntu siqu kanye nesikhathi esidingekayo

Mnike isikhathi esanele, ukuze akwazi ukucabanga ngombono wakho endaweni yengqondo engenazo iziphazamiso. Lokhu mhlawumbe kuzombonisa ukuthi uzihlonipha kangakanani izidingo nezifiso zakhe. Noma ukuthi ungazizwa isimo sakhe sengqondo futhi uphendule ngendlela eyakhayo. Isikhala ebudlelwaneni singakusiza ngempela ukuguqula lokhu kube yisimo esiphumelelayo.

4. Thululela isifuba kumngane/isihlobo esikhulu noma ufune ukwelulekwa ngokochwepheshe

Ungafinyelela eqophelweni elithile ebudlelwaneni bakho lapho ukungahloniphi komkakho kungase kuqale ukulimaza impilo yakho engokwengqondo kanye nempilo yomshado wakho. Ungase ukhononde, “Umkami akahloniphi futhi angazi ukuthi ngingawusindisa kanjani umshado wami.”

Nokho, ezimweni ezinjalo, kungase kube isikhathi sokufuna usizo lwangaphandle. Thulula isifuba sakho kumngane/isihlobo omethembayo ukuthi sizokunikeza iseluleko esiphephile nesiphusile sokuthi kufanele yini uqale isahluko esisha ekuphileni noma uzame ukulungisa umshado wakho. Umbono womuntu omethembayo ungakunikeza umbono omusha wokuthi ungabhekana kanjani nomngane wakho womshado ongenanhlonipho.

Ukwelulekwa kwemibhangqwana noma ukwelashwa kwemibhangqwana kungenye indlela yokusindisa umshado wakho nokuxazulula umehluko. Umeluleki womshado onolwazi angakusiza ngeseluleko esithile sochwepheshe futhi akusize ubhekane nemizwa ekhathazayo ebangelwa yilesi simo. Uma ufuna usizo, izinsizakalo zokwelulekwa zeBonobology zitholakala ngokuchofoza nje.

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Ingabe Ukwelulekwa Ngomshado Kuyasebenza Ekuxazululeni Izinkinga Zobudlelwano?

5. Lungela ukuqhubeka

Uma usadidekile ngokuthi ungabhekana kanjani nomfazi ongahloniphi, khumbula, ngenkathi uzama ukulungisa izindlela nowesifazane ongakuhloniphi, kufanele wazi ukuthi angabuya yini ekukuhlonipheni noma ukuthi ubuhlobo bufanele yini ukulondolozwa. Kodwa uma kwenzeka kungasebenzi lutho, qiniseka ukuthi akuwena onephutha, futhi ulungele ukuqhubeka nokuqala isahluko esisha. Khumbula, umlingani ongahloniphi ngeke akujabulise.

6. Beka imingcele ecacile

Ukuze ubhekane nomfazi ongakuhloniphi, udinga ukuqina maqondana nemingcele yakho. Ngakho-ke, yeka ukuvumela amazwi ahlekisayo noma ukuziphatha okungekuhle kushelele bese uqala ukuqiniseka nokuthatha izintambo. UNeha uthi, “Ukuqiniseka kumayelana nokwenqaba ukuhlanganyela empikiswaneni yobudlelwano engakhiqizi , okuyinto abantu abaningi abahlukumeza ngamazwi abangena kuyo.” Nakhu ongakwenza:

• Bazise ukuthi ukuphawula okuthile noma amahlaya akumele enziwe uma kusesidlangalaleni
• Qiniseka ukuthi uyabatshela ukuthi bangakhulumi nabanye ocingweni noma bavule i-TV lapho usebenza ekamelweni lakho
• Kwazise ukuthi izinkinga zolaka nokuzicabangela zidinga ukuxazululwa hhayi ukuthi ziyiswe phambili ngosuku olulandelayo

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Imingcele Eyishumi Nanhlanu Ebalulekile Emshadweni Ochwepheshe Bafunga Ngayo

7. Ungakufaki ngaphakathi ukungahloniphi

Khumbula, kungumthwalo wakho wemfanelo ukugcina ingqondo yakho iphilile. Uma uhlala uphathwa kabi futhi ungahlonishwa ngumkakho, kungokwemvelo ukuwela ogibeni lokuzisola bese uqala ukuhlushwa ukuzenyeza . Ngakho-ke, ungakufaki ngaphakathi ukungahloniphi noma uhlanganyele ezintweni ezimbi. Nakhu ongakwenza esikhundleni salokho:

• Gxila ekuphambukiseni ingqondo yakho
• Chitha isikhathi uthuthukisa umsebenzi wokuzilibazisa othuthukisa umuzwa wakho wokuzethemba
• Zindla noma gcina ijenali ekusiza ukuthi uhlanganise imicabango yakho eyakhayo

Inhlonipho nothando kufana nezinhlangothi ezimbili zohlamvu lwemali olulodwa. Uma okunye kwalokhu kulahleka, ubuhlobo bakho ngeke bukwazi ukusinda ekuvivinyweni kwesikhathi. Ngakho-ke, cabanga ngalokhu ngokucophelela futhi wenze isinqumo ngokuhlakanipha. Khumbula, akuwena onephutha ngaso sonke isikhathi. Ngakho-ke, ungakufaki ngaphakathi ukuhlukumeza.

Asikho nesisodwa isisombululo sendlela yokusebenzelana nomkakho uma ekudelela. Kulesi sihloko, sinikeze izimpendulo ezimbalwa, kodwa akulona uhlu oluphelele futhi kukuwe ukuthi wenze ukukhetha. Ngakho-ke, uma umkakho engakuhloniphi, unelungelo lokuthatha ukungahloniphi njengento enkulu futhi ukulungise noma uphume ebuhlotsheni obuhlukumezayo uqale isahluko esisha. Kufanele wenze lokho okuthakasela wena. Futhi khumbula ukuthi uma abantu ababili emshadweni befuna ukulungisa izinto, bangaphuma kunoma yisiphi isimo, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi sisibi kangakanani.

Imibuzo Evame Ukubuzwa

Izindlela Eziyisi-8 Zokusola Ebudlelwaneni Kuyayilimaza

Ngaphandle Kobufakazi Besihluku Somkami, Ungafakaza Kanjani Enkantolo?

Izizathu Eziyi-15 Zangempela Zokuthi Umkakho Agweme Ukusondelana

Umnikelo wakho awuyona iminikelo yokusiza . Kuzovumela i-Bonobology ukuthi iqhubeke nokukulethela ulwazi olusha nolusesikhathini njengoba sifuna ukusiza noma ubani emhlabeni ukuthi afunde ukwenza noma yini.