These days kids are more self-centered than the generation of their grandparents. The main cry among the millennial is WIIFM – or ‘What’s in it for me’. Whether it’s in a product, or an employment or a marriage they need to know what they will get out of it. No wonder then that a great number of youngsters prefer to have live-in, open marriages, rather than one committed marriage. Nevertheless some do fall genuinely in love and want to cement their bonds and have children. They do face roadblocks when they have to make decisions regarding important milestones of their lives together. Though both are equal in their contribution to making a happy family, it is a fact that a woman does have a higher Emotional Quotient and can skillfully keep the peace and love within the relationship and thus maintain a happy family. Here are some pointers to women to remind them what they can do, to be graceful and serene.
1. You don’t always have to be right
If it is a petty argument and it escalates to a full-fledged fight, take a couple of deep breaths. Do you really need to win? It is better to maintain peace than to be right. And it’s okay to say, “All right I give in”. Also, when you have acquiesced a couple times he will get the drift and stop wanting to be right all the time. Watch out for abusive husbands though. If your being submissive makes him enraged – run for your life and don’t look back.
2. Argue one at a time
If for some reason the hubby is in a bad mood or has had a difficult day at work but you need to vent as well, hold on. With a little patience you will discover its best for one person to vent at a time. When he is done and you want to express your feeling choose an opportune moment when he is not erupting like a volcano and put your thoughts up for discussion. He will appreciate this discretion on your part and will be more than willing to see your point of view, when he is in a calmer state of mind.
3. Do things especially for him consistently
Even if you are a busy mom or a working wife, a husband always like to get a bit of special loving. That can be in the form of picking out his clothes for office, making a special breakfast. Teaching the children how to express their love for him in a respectful manner. He may also feel that he is needed, most men do. So tell him of your deepest wish – like you want to go on a cruise for a holiday. Or that he should pick up a puppy for the children’s birthday. It makes him feel useful and think of himself as a good husband and provider. Of course none of this is possible without constant communication. No better way to make him happier than to cook for him and make his favorite cocktails.
4. Learn all his erogenous zones
For all but a few, sex is the golden key to be happy. The fact that you are a willing partner is in itself a great turn-on for your husband. If you are the first mover to initiate sex, you will double his happiness. It is like a sign of love to take the trouble, to talk to him, discover his fantasies and his favorite spots and positions during sex. This enhances intimacy and your bond with him grows deeper. For most husbands having sex is the ultimate expression of love. And what is a marriage when the wife is cold or disinterested. Don’t let the burden of sex be entirely on your husband. You can do more than your share and ensure a satisfied and content hubby purring like a cat and eating out of your hand.
5. Make his mother happy
This may be a tall order for many wives. If you already enjoy a lovely relationship with your husband, no intelligent woman will ruin it by being nasty to his mother. Even the most difficult MIL will see that you care for her son. And if you do love him is it so difficult to be nice to the woman who cared for him many more years than you? I have a simple point of view; if she were your boss at your place of work, you would be bending backwards to keep her happy. So take a little more effort – talk to her, listen to her and learn all your husband’s favourite things straight from the horse’s mouth!
It is not a difficult task to keep your husband happy, and it’s a cakewalk if he is a chilled out laid-back guy. A happy husband goes a long way in creating a happy fun-filled family.