In the world of romance and dating, the most magical leap of faith is the one where we confess to a girl that we like her. You must be sweating your water content off thinking about how to tell a girl you want a relationship with her, and here we are calling it magical. It is magical because if the feelings are reciprocated, you find a sense of joy that nothing else can offer. If the results are negative on the other hand, you develop character by defeating the fear of rejection.
So if you have a girl in sight, who has been steering the butterflies in your stomach, we’ve got a few ideas on how you can tell a girl you want a relationship with her. Before you take the big jump, we’d like to urge you to think about why you want to get serious. We often fall prey to wishful thinking without setting up a rational base for those lovey-dovey emotions. The why needs to be clear before the how.
17 Ways To Tell A Girl You Want A Relationship With Her
So, you are crushing on this girl and wondering if there is a fool-proof plan to confess? Well, the answer is no. You can never be sure with girls. The minds of women are wired to feel, interpret and communicate differently. And each woman is unique, so yes we understand you’re stressing out about finding the best way to tell a girl you like her without ruining the friendship and relationship.
To ease up your mental muscles, we have come up with a few ways that can give you a better chance at spilling the beans without having them go bad. Women can be unique and diverse, so to give you a high chance of success, we’ve listed down the 17 most effective options to address the question of how to tell a girl you want a relationship with her.
1. You can indirectly tell a girl you like her
The worst thing you can do is come in too hot and tell her what you like and love about them. You need to test the waters first. The best way to do it is by going the indirect route. You can let them know you’re interested by telling them how much you enjoy their company or by complimenting things you like about them. If they catch your drift, you know the water is perfect to dive in.
You can set up the whole conversation by asking her what she looks for in a man, about her current dating life, and her dating plans. This would give you an insight into how and when to make the move. Also, being an active listener is the best indirect way to show genuine interest. But should you tell a girl that you like her over a text? Absolutely no!
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2. Go old-school with notes, letters, or presents
Before you get all Shakespearean with your confession, you need to first find out if the girl is into old-school love and romance. If not, there couldn’t be a more creepy way to tell a girl how you feel about her. If yes, you can write her letters telling her about your feelings. Small notes too can do the job for you. You can have presents delivered to her midday with these cute little notes.
The message should be heartfelt and honest instead of poetic and romantic. Being an artistic writer is not for everyone. If not done right, it would be a complete disaster because no one likes a wannabe. You can write about the little things you like about her the most. You can even mention that the reason you’re writing these pieces of affection is that you’re shy. This way you get to tell a girl you like her indirectly and be cute doing it too.
3. Indulge in activities she likes
Having common interests is the best ice-breaker there can be. Join the book club she goes to, or the gym she works out in. The trick here is to find the things she enjoys that you enjoy too. At the beginning of a relationship, if you guys indulge in activities you both enjoy, it is bound to be fun. And she will associate that fun with you, so you become fun too.
Now, you are in a position to find things where you can spend more time with her and really get to know her. When things are comfortable enough, and you still think you’re not able to fathom the courage to put your heart out, try asking her the revered question, “how to tell a girl you want a relationship with her?” If she gets the hint, jackpot! If not, at least you’ll know her thoughts on it.
Related Reading: Are Common Interests In Relationships The Most Important Factor?
4. Be there for her
Being there doesn’t mean that you always stay on your feet. There are high chances that she might eventually take you for granted. Being there means your help is there when it is needed. Rebecca had been looking for the first edition of “How to win friends and influence people”. Miguel was a part of the same group as her in college and had a thing for her but couldn’t just say it out loud. She was out of his league.
His uncle was a collector of books and luckily he had the one Rebecca was looking for. He placed the book in her bag without her noticing. When she opened her bag later, there it was, with a note saying, “I hope this makes us better friends and helps me win you over.” They went out on a date that weekend and are still in a very happy relationship. Supporting your partner in her passions and endeavors says a lot about your intentions toward her. A smart way to tell a girl you like her without ruining the friendship, isn’t it?
5. Spend each waking moment with her
No, don’t take it quite literally. What we mean is, spend more time with her. No gift is as valuable as your time. When you spend time together, it shows that you’re ready to invest in the relationship. It also gives you some valuable insights into considering it as a long-term option or not.
Quality time love language is the secret agent. It will tell you her likes, dislikes, favorite cafes, etc. You’ll also be able to notice things she doesn’t say out loud, like her trigger points. Both of you will get to know each other better and help you make better choices moving forward. While you pour your heart out, you need to be careful to watch for her involvement too. This should be one of the subtlest ways how to tell a girl you want a relationship with her.
6. Go with the third-party approach
Having a mutual friend can be a blessing if you are losing sleep over how to tell a girl that you want a relationship with her. The friend can assess how the terrains are before you go for a walk down the romantic lane. He could give you valuable insight on what would work with the girl.
Imagine you tell a girl you want to date her on a hike because you know she loves them. Wouldn’t that increase your chances of making a successful move? Even if it doesn’t go as planned, the friend can neutralize the situation as facing her could be awkward for both of you. The third wheel can come in handy sometimes.
Related Reading: How To Cope With Being Single Or A Third Wheel On New Year’s Eve
7. Can I take you out on a date?
The most rapid and modern way to do it is just to ask a girl out. Yes, it’ll take guts but it is actually a very simple hack to the whole situation. In the modern world, dating simply means you are on a shopping spree. You try a few options until you find the one that fits perfectly.
So when you ask someone out, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re in love with them. It just means you like them and you’d like to explore the possibility of having a relationship. The problems start when you start making a big deal out of it. Tell a girl that you want to date her and the worst that can happen is that she refuses to go out. At least, it tells you that it was not for you and saves you a lot of time. You can move on.
8. Go for the kill
Again, not literally! We mean to suggest: going for the direct approach. There is no way around doing this. Especially in the world we live in today, it is best to save everyone’s time and just get it over with. Who says you can’t go prepared for this one too. Make sure you have her in a zone where she listens to you. Somewhere she is relaxed and comfortable but it is just the two of you.
If you’re still unsure about what to say, rehearse what you have in mind. It is a human tendency to receive everything heartfelt with openness. You start by asking if you can share something with her, and then gradually arrive at the things you like about her. Once she is in the conversation, tell her that you have been swooning over her for the past year. This is how you tell a girl you want a relationship with her. No no, just kidding. Telling her you like her and would like to take her out should suffice.
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9. Look out for the perfect time
Girls are generally attracted to guys with a plan. A lot of their hesitation comes from the infinite amount of questions they have in mind. If you are prepared and have the answers, you’ve won half the battle. It is important to know what would be a good time to show affection to your partner. Girls are great at multitasking and their minds are usually quite occupied.
Finding a time where they are relaxed and in the present could be the defining difference between you jumping with joy or sulking in sorrow. If you know her well, a nice moment can also be created. This is one of the hidden secrets of how to tell a girl you want a relationship with her.
10. Find the perfect spot
Success is about the placement as much as it is about the timing. Sam had a thing for Mei and had finally found the courage to tell her about it. “Today is the day!” he declared to himself. They were going to a party that night and he chose it to be the place he usually parties at. Mei mingled with the rest of the party while Sam anxiously sat in one corner waiting for the right moment.
Eventually, he found himself sitting beside her during a drinking game. He did gather courage and mumbled, “I really like you” in her ear. How do you think that went? This is one of the worst ways to tell a girl you want to date her. Find a spot where she is present in the conversation and then slowly slide into the mushy stuff.
11. Be blunt and bold
Some girls find confidence and clarity of thought super-attractive. The tricky part here is to find out if your girl is into the blunt and bold. If you see signs that she appreciates straightforward conversations and doesn’t like beating around the bush, and you’re busy busting your head about how to tell a girl you want a relationship with her, here is the answer.
Find a moment alone with her and just blurt it out. Such girls will dig your confidence and courage and at the very least, will appreciate your attempt at not wasting their time. Approaching girls is often intimidating for guys. The guys who overcome their insecurities and display confidence are the ones who find success in the dating avenue.
Related Reading: How To Ask A Girl Out On A Date – 18 Tips To Make Her Say Yes
12. Detachment can work too in some cases
The nice guy is often walked over and taken for granted. Let us say, you’ve tried to be there for her and have gone out of your way to show that you care. And yet, you see no reciprocation from her end, there are chances that you’ve been taken for granted or worse, been friend-zoned. And you keep wondering how to get out of the friendzone.
The best way to tell a girl how you feel about her, especially in a case like this is to tell and detach. Tell her that you have feelings but you realize that your feelings are invalidated. So, you need time and space to get over it. Should you tell a girl you like her over text? Hell no! Meet with her and speak your heart out. If she does care, she’ll stop you and will try to find a way to talk it out. If not, you’ll know, she’s not worth it.
13. Can we be friends?
Some girls have the fear of labeling relationships. To such girls, head-on confrontation about your feelings could be like cutting the branch you’re on. Instead, you could ask them to be your friend. Sure, you should try and drop hints, and tell a girl you like her indirectly. This is a painstakingly longer route toward expressing your feelings, but like Jamie Lannister says in Game of Thrones, “Things we do for love!”
You need to keep an eye on the gradual slide into the friend zone. You need to look out for their hints too. If you can see a rally being played from both courts, you can eventually confess. Mark our words, there is no way around it, so you better be prepared. Asking to become friends can be a subtle way of how to tell a girl you want a relationship with her.
Related Reading: 10 Signs You Are Moving From Friends To Lovers
14. Be the guy with a plan
Let’s say that she agrees to meet with you one-on-one and you plan on telling her that you like her. This is only half the job done. Girls are wired to be attracted to security. And there will be questions when you drop the romantic bomb. Loads of questions. If you show that you’re not solid about the prospect of a relationship, it could be a huge turn-off.
Hope for the best and prepare for the worst. Be prepared for the questions. Answer them calmly. Accept the ones you don’t have an answer to, with dignity. We’d suggest you even be prepared to be rejected. This one is more for you than it is for her. Have a plan to deal with that situation too. Your composure will calm her nerves and tilt the game in your favor.
15. How to tell a girl you want a relationship with her over text?
You should basically avoid discussing matters of heart over text. If the person is away and you want to pitch the prospect of a long-distance relationship, only then text could work. Firstly, you need to establish a level of comfort while texting. You have been texting for a while and you both enjoy it almost as much as you’d enjoy each other’s physical company.
The dynamics stay the same. Find a perfect time of the day, start with what you like about her, and keep the message crisp and clear. You can even send her a nice present or note to make the moment even more special. This could either turn out to be a cute-romantic conversation or be a complete disaster of miscommunication. So, choose wisely.
16. How to tell a girl you want a relationship with her on a hike?
If you have lost sleep over a girl who is an adrenaline junkie, it is time to take some action. If you like her and you know what she is passionate about, you can use the experience to set you up. Take her on a hike, one that she’s not been on. On the way, you can gently start dropping hints by telling her how much you enjoy her company.
Then eventually, pick the right spot, ideally the top, for the big revelation. The view will provide an amazing backdrop, and while she is mesmerized by the view, you can tell her. The beauty of the hike and the view will add their persuasive charm to the situation and there are high chances that you’ll come back a happy man.
Related Reading: The 15 Most Creative Outdoor Proposal Ideas
17. Should you tell a girl you like her over text? Some don’ts
Do not tell a girl you want a relationship over text if meeting in person is a possibility. There are a lot of emotions riding on such a declaration which are hard to negate over texts. There is a huge possibility that the conversation is interrupted which leaves scope for miscommunication. Doing it in person is highly advisable.
Another thing to avoid is coming across as too strong. Everybody processes information differently. So, when you’ve done the hard part, give her some space to process it and come back to you when she is ready. Space is crucial in any relationship. This doesn’t just give her the indication that you’re considerate, but it also gives you time to digest that you’ve taken the leap and the ball is in her court now.
There is no guarantee when it comes to expressing your feelings and receiving the same in return. But then, that is the beauty of it, right? You try your best and leave it up to the universe to find the one for you. We hope the above mentioned points help you answer the question of how to tell a girl you want a relationship with her.