Are you in love with a person who doesn’t think of you as anything more than a friend? Are you tired of it? Well, obviously you are. Nobody likes being called a friend when you want more. But how do you get out of a zone like that? Don’t get disheartened there are ways to move out of the friendzone and we are there to help you out.
A study on the friend zone phenomena suggested that friend zone is a situation where an individual covets a romantic relationship with a close friend that never evolves; typically, the situation includes a male seeking a potential sexual partner with a female. Now, if you are in such a position, here’s our advice on how to get out of friend zone.
18 Ways To Get Out Of The Friendzone
We all have heard many stories where people fall in love with their friends and they made great couples. At times, loving a friend is a one-sided affair, and what most such people regret is the fact they they were not able to identify being in a friendzone earlier. Had they known earlier, they would have not gotten caught in such a situation. Being in a friendzone is indeed a tight spot to be in!
So far you may have read articles on signs that you are in the friendzone or how not to get caught up in the friendzone. But this is where we stand apart now. We tell you how you can get out of the friendzone if you find yourself caught up in it.
1. Don’t appear too needy
To get out of the friendzone quickly, stop acting all needy. When you are in a position wherein you constantly call or text them, there are chances that you might be taken for granted. Stop acting all desperate. Stop initiating things and make sure you don’t appear too needy. Create an impression that can baffle people, not one that doesn’t get attention.
2. Distance yourself
If you have already told them multiple times how you feel about them, maybe now it’s time that you stop doing that. It is important that they know how you feel if after that, they do not want to take the relationship further, it’s their choice. It is going to affect you badly, so it’s better that you distance yourself from them, for your own well-being. Remember, distancing does not mean you stalk them.
3. Make him/her believe that you like someone else
Now that you have distanced yourself, make sure you let them know that you are not interested in them anymore. Make them believe that you are into someone else now. Two things can happen – either they have feelings for you and come running back or they don’t care and you know where you stand. No matter what happens, you don’t lose your self-respect.
4. Make them feel jealous
If he/she actually likes you and has started thinking of you as a friend because of some of your actions, this might work. Jealousy is a tool which, when used right, can work wonders. Let them know you are seeing someone who is clearly better than your previous choice. Drop-in indirect hints and see the fire coming up. If they are into you, this will work. If not, look out for more solutions below.
Related Reading: Less than lovers, more than friends
5. Behave as if you’re really busy
The major problem with people who are friendzoned is that they do not value themselves. Don’t reach there on time, don’t receive their calls in the first ring, don’t be available all the time. Set your priorities. Work for more important things in life and even if you don’t have anything, behave as if you’re really busy.
Reduce the amount of attention you are showering on them. Treat them just like any other friend.
6. If you are friendzoned, be the friend
Sometimes, we don’t understand the value of friendship itself. It is where everything begins. Pyaar Dosti hai. Realize that it is important that you be there for them in their tough times, if they want you as a friend, then so be it. You cannot force your emotions on someone else. If they are really into you, they would want to move things ahead gradually. If not, acceptance is the key. Bring back the best of your friendship in the relationship.
7. Respect their choices
It is important that you respect their choices, no matter what. If they are seeing someone else, it is no use bitching about that person. Don’t badmouth them or their partner in front of your social groups, it only shows you as a negative person. Learn to respect them and their choices. True love lies in respect.
Being friendzoned can be a good sign sometimes, maybe this person is not the one for you.
8. Understand that they don’t owe you anything
Remember, what you do as a friend for them is supposed to be selfless. You should not be expecting favours in return. Friendship is when you can rely on one another without worrying about anything else. If you are expecting favours in return to what you do for them, tell them that beforehand.
Related Reading: 12 Signs It’s Time To Stop Pursuing The Girl You Like And Back Off
9. Stop overthinking
You need to, right away, stop victimizing yourself. Stop making yourself the object of pity. No crime has been done. Getting friendzoned is no big deal. Please stop obsessing over it, it will drain out your energy. Do not be that hopeless romantic who just can’t stop singing sad songs and hogging on tubs of ice-cream.
There are umpteen number of people out there, you can find anyone if this doesn’t work for you. Don’t lose your hopes and don’t forego your standards for one person.
You have to tell yourself every day that you are a gem and not everyone can find one or recognize one.
10. Stop expecting
Expectations hurt the most. If you constantly expect them to call you or text you or shower you with the attention that you keep on giving them, you are going to get disappointed. Chances are they don’t even spare a minute to think of you. Why waste your time on them? It is best that you stop expecting, if you feel like giving out love and positivity, do that. But don’t expect to receive the same.
11. Don’t make your decisions based on their likes/dislikes
What most people, especially teenagers do is deciding rashly when it comes to the major life decisions. Their decisions are based on what their crush is doing.
Remember, love and career and life are not the same things. What stream to choose for higher secondary education or what job to take should be based on what prospects can you get not on what your crush has decided to do in his/her life. Such decisions can make you regret later on. Not just the big ones, smaller decisions like where to go and what to wear should also be your own choice rather than your crush’s.
12. Stop being possessive about them
It is okay to be someone’s well-wisher and be protective of them at times, but it is not okay to be possessive about them. It can make them feel uncomfortable and it can also lead to them pushing you away further. No matter what your intentions are, good or bad, you have to give them the space to make their own mistakes and learn from them.
Related Reading: 10 Ways a Guy Reacts When He Thinks a Girl Is Out of His League
13. Don’t flirt creepily
Flirting can either be a turn on or a complete turn off depending on how you do it. Chances are you messed up when you started flirting making yourself seem unattractive. Tip is, don’t flirt if you are not good at it. Take tips from friends who are actually good at it. While flirting, the person you are flirting with should be blushing looking at the phone screen or in person. Then, you are successful. It is all about words. If you are not good at it, it is better to not do it, rather than doing it creepily.
14. Make sure you are not being taken advantage of
With all of this in mind, also take care of the fact that your vulnerabilities are not taken advantage of. Make sure they are not using you for their own benefits. Do not be a back up plan.
Sometimes, we hope for things to move forward, and get ready for anything and everything only to drown in a pool of tears later. Don’t let that happen. Make conscious decisions and don’t flow in the river of love without a swimsuit.
15. Stay away if it gets too painful
It can be difficult to stay in a zone where you are not too special and you see someone else taking the place you wanted to be in. If you have already expressed your feelings and you see them with someone else, it is a clear sign that they are not into you. That can be very hurtful for you and you might lose hold over emotions. So, it is better to stay away until you heal. If you cannot tolerate it, if it makes you feel jealous, it is okay. Embrace your emotions and take a break. Divert yourself, give time to your hobbies.
Related Reading: Why Is It So Hard To Let Go, Even If The Person Doesn’t Love You?
16. Accept it- maybe it’s best to be friendzoned
If nothing works out, the last thing you can do is accept your fate. Trust me, sometimes being friendzoned works. If they are not into you, there is absolutely nothing you can do to make them fall for you. Rather than, badmouthing them or crying like a baby, you should accept it and hope for something better in life. Understand that some relationships happen, some don’t. If you really are in love with them, be happy with what makes them happy.
17. Don’t lose hope
We know how hard it is to get out of the friendzone, but remember this is not the end of the world. It is okay to be considered a friend. It is normal to not have feelings reciprocated. The trick is to never lose hope. Perhaps, someday you’ll find someone who’ll value you for who you are. Someone way better than your current love. True love will find its way in your life, sooner or later.
18. Work on yourself and your goals
While you are trying to escape the friendzone, start working on things that matter the most. Work on your body and practice self-love. Start making goals and work towards them. Don’t let one rejection lower your morale. Make sure you start improving on your mental and physical health.
We know that it is easier said than done. But friendzone is not something that can stop you from being the best version of you. It is important that you know your self-worth and look out for more things in life than just focusing your entire energy trying to make one person fall for you. If it is going to happen, it will happen. If it doesn’t happen, something better awaits you.