Counselling

I’m not enjoying sex with my husband and feel like avoiding it. How important is sex in the relationship?

No one owes sex to anyone but you may owe your partner the effort to find a solution.
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Q: I am a married 43-year-old woman with two kids. My life is really perfect. I love my job, my children are healthy and my husband is great. The only problem is; I dont like having sex with him. When we were first together, our sex life was fine  nothing amazing, but it didnt bother me. But as more time passed, the more I realize he doesnt touch me the way I want to be touched and Id rather he just didnt touch me at all. Though it makes me sad to think at 43, my sex life is basically over, I have no desire to cheat on him. It wouldnt be worth it and I couldnt stand the thought of hurting him. I have tried so many times and in so many ways to communicate what I want him to do, but he just doesnt get it. He is very mechanical when it comes to sexnever looks me in the eye or spends any time connecting emotionally. It leaves me feeling angry and lonely and wanting to avoid the whole situation altogether. When I do that, though, he starts getting really mad at me, so I have sex with him just to keep the peace. Then I feel even madder. Its all starting to build up into a terrible resentment. I wish we could just take sex off the table altogether. How important do you think sex is to a relationship anyway?

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