They say, “Behind every angry woman stands a man, who has absolutely no idea what he did wrong.” Wives get angry with you for various reasons and more than half the time the husbands don’t know why. Well, we can’t blame poor husbands every time as wives are moody at times, which makes them turn pretty short-tempered. And an angry wife can mean the whole house goes upside down!
Wives will get angry it is a given. But how do you calm your angry wife? This is what we will talk about in this article. Often men get flabbergasted when their wives get angry, unable to fathom what they did to trigger the episode.
Keep this in mind that no wife stays angry forever. If you are a sensible husband you would know how you should calm your angry wife and make her happy.
If your wife is always angry and negative, you need to understand the different triggers that make her angry. Perhaps she has anger issues that has caused turbulence in your married life. Anger can also lead to a depressed and negative wife.
It is important to revive your wife’s happiness and bring back the lost happiness in your house. And you should know by heart how to make an angry wife happy.
Paul Friedman, the founder of Marriage Foundation says in one of his YouTube talks, “One good thing is anger is not sustaining. There are two different degrees of anger. One is a reactive outburst and the other level is emotional anger which is carried inside constantly. So the first thing a husband should learn to do is disengage the moment she gets angry or he can just duck. You can get a glass of water or ask her out for a walk and then talk about the issues.”
Why Is Your Wife Always Angry And Negative?
Anger and unhappiness comes with unmet expectations. Your wife may be having certain expectations from you which you haven’t been able to fulfill. Sometimes negativity is also a sign of a depressed wife.
Ever wondered why your wife brings up previous fights in your present ones? It is because those issues haven’t been totally resolved. And you must have been thinking that your wife hates you.
Many times unresolved issues crop up in your wife’s mind and makes her even more frustrated. This leads to anger and resentment in your wife. If your wife is always angry and negative, it means that there’s something on her mind that is troubling her and will continue to frustrate her until it’s resolved.
Negativity builds up in a marriage for a lot of reasons. Your wife could be exhausted balancing career and home, especially when you don’t help her with the chores at all. Following deadlines, buying groceries doing kids homework is not an easy job.
She flares up at the slightest pretext and you keep saying, “I don’t know how to make my angry wife happy.”
Have you checked if any financial issues are plaguing her? Is she unable to handle the pressure of her marriage? Had she expected you to be more caring and supportive but you have not been able to meet that expectation? If your wife gets angry often then it could have a deeper root that you need to get to.
10 Ways To Make An Angry Wife Happy
If your wife is mad at you, everything in the marriage seems to fall apart. You feel that your house doesn’t have the happiness and light that it used to have. What to do when wife is upset? Why is my wife mad at me? How do I deal with an angry wife? These are some questions you ask yourself when your wife is mad at you.
You want to calm her down and make her happy again but don’t know how to do so. Don’t worry, there’s nothing that can’t be fixed. Here are 10 ways on how to calm an angry wife.
Related Reading: 5 Typical Things A Wife Tells Her Man On Sundays
1. Apologize for your mistake
Wives are mad at their husbands for a longer period because their husbands don’t apologize for their mistake. It is important that when there is a fight, one person keeps his/her ego aside and tries to fix things.
If you are the one who has committed the mistake, you should apologize sincerely to your wife at the first chance you get. Sincere apology has its virtue.
2. Try to calm her down
It is important to calm your wife down when she is mad at you. If you don’t attempt to calm your wife down when she is mad, it will vex her even more. Do not get to saying hurtful things or attempt to blame-shifting. Instead, try talking to her or holding her tightly when she lashes out at you.
At this time make it a point not to retaliate or say something that aggravates her even more. This is the time to show her that you still care for her even if she is shouting at you. She will eventually give into your efforts and calm down.
If your wife is angry with you, be the bigger person and keep your ego aside. Stay calm and try to calm her down. Once she is calm, talk to her and work on resolving the issue.
3. Listen to her side
When your wife is angry at you, she turns into a nagging wife. A nagging wife may keep complaining a lot but this may not be without reason.
Listen to what complaints or issues she has with you. Perhaps you come home late everyday, or have been lying a lot. Perhaps there are some chores she wishes you take care of.
Make her pour her heart out and try to understand her perspective. Listening to her side of the story will also help you realize your mistake.
4. Don’t let your ego come in between
Many a times when married couples fight, the issue becomes even worse because both partners aren’t willing to let go of their ego.
Both partners in their mind feel that they are right and in doing so hamper their relationship. And gradually, fights become bigger than the relationship. You should not let your ego come in the way when you are trying to make your angry wife happy. Put it aside and then only approach her.
5. Surprise her
An angry wife won’t be angry for long when she starts seeing that you are making efforts to win back her love. You know all the things that will make her heart melt and now is the chance to use those things to win your wife back.
Give her surprises and thoughtful gifts like sending her flowers, cooking for her or sending her chocolates spelling ‘I’m sorry’. Her heart will melt in no time and her anger will disappear.
6. Flirt with her
Did you think about flirting with your spouse? Strangely flirting actually helps in calming your angry wife. Flirting with a touch of humour and apology does wonders in making your angry wife calm down. Imagine a scenario where your wife says that she doesn’t want to talk to you.
So you as a husband should not start ignoring her, instead, in response you can say, “But I can’t stay without my wife not talking to me. I may die. Oh no! I’m dying already, please come back to your crappy good for nothing husband.”
The cheesier it sounds, the more effective it is. Your wife will begin to smile and you’ll know that it’s working.
7. Show compassion
If your wife’s anger and frustration is coming out of nowhere, it might not be your fault. There must be something else on her mind that she is not ready to share. Do not get frustrated with her behaviour or pull away because you may be all that she has.
If she avoids intimacy or shows signs of drifting away, do not lash at her for being a bad wife. At this point, show compassion to her and let her know that you are there for her no matter what.
When your wife feels ready to talk, she will come forward and share her feelings with you.
8. Show her that you’re improving yourself
If you’ve made a mistake, don’t just apologize to your wife for the sake of it. If your wife sees you committing the same mistake again, it could hurt her even more and she could start pulling away from you.
Saying sorry is not enough unless you are making efforts to work on the problem. After promising her that you won’t commit the same mistake again, show her that you are working on improving yourself for her sake. When she sees your genuine efforts, she will feel happier.
9. Calm your angry wife by giving her a tight hug
This can work wonders. Trust us. When your wife is angry and is in a fit of rage so go ahead and give her a tight bear hug and see the effect.
She might resist initially but it will inevitably calm her down and she could start crying. But one thing is for sure she wouldn’t be able to resist the hug. She would hug you back as tightly and will calm down. Then you can have a chat and resolve your issues.
10. Order food online
It is said that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. But if you have to make your angry wife happy then food is also a way out.
Once you have managed to calm her down order some food online. Ensure it’s her favourite Thai, Chinese or Japanese fare. Serve the food and then have a talk at the dinner table. Ask her what’s throwing her off the edge and if those issues can be resolved.
Remember, anger mostly crops up from hurt and expectations. Your wife may be angry at you for valid reasons and this is an indication that you hurt her in some way. You being the husband, need to work towards calming her down and bringing her back to her normal self again.
If after many attempts, you aren’t able to pin point the reason for her negative behaviour, seek a third opinion. Having a fresh perspective might help you resolve your wife’s anger issues.