11 Mavuto Paubwenzi Pafupifupi Aliyense Ayenera Kukumana Nawo - Ndi Mayankho

Panthawi ina, tonse takhala tikungoganizira za momwe ubale wathu wabwino ungakhalire. Kupeza mnyamata kapena mtsikana wangwiro amene angapange moyo kukhala wowala komanso wodzaza ndi chisangalalo, ndikuyamba ulendo wosangalala mpaka kalekale. Komabe, pojambula chithunzi cholota ichi, anthu ambiri amaiwala kuyikapo zovuta paubwenzi zomwe zimadza ndi gawolo.

Ngakhale mutapeza wokondedwa wanu wamaloto, yemwe ali zonse zomwe mumayembekezera ndi zina zambiri, ndi nthawi yochepa kuti muyambe kuzindikira zinthu zomwe zimakuvutitsani. Mwinamwake samataya mbale mukamaliza kudya, kapena mwina amavutika kuti asamachite mantha ndi kusonyeza kufooka kwawo. Mikhalidwe yotereyi ili ndi njira yosinthira kukhala zovuta mbanja kwa maanja.

M'malo modikirira kuti nsapato ina igwe, ndi bwino kukhala okonzeka kuthana ndi zovuta zaubwenzi. Chifukwa adzabwera, ndipo ngati mupitirizabe kukana za chipwirikiti m’paradaiso wanu wachikondi, zinthu zikhoza kusokonekera. Chifukwa chake, ndi zidziwitso kuchokera kwa mphunzitsi asanakwatirane komanso pachibwenzi Geetarsh Kaur, woyambitsa The Skill School yomwe imagwira ntchito yomanga maubwenzi olimba, tiyeni tiwone zovuta zina zomwe anthu amakumana nazo komanso momwe angathanirane nazo.

Ndi Mavuto Otani Mu Ubwenzi?

Musanaphunzire momwe mungayendetsere zovuta zaubwenzi popanda kuwalola kuti awononge ubale wanu, ndikofunikira kuti mufotokoze zomwe zimayambitsa zovuta muubwenzi. Izi ndizofunikira monga kufotokozera ubale womwewo, ngati sichoncho. Popeza banja lililonse ndi lapadera, mavuto omwe amakumana nawo panjira amathanso kukhala osiyanasiyana komanso mosiyanasiyana.

Ngakhale kuti palibe kutsutsa kuti maubwenzi onse amafunikira ntchito yambiri ndipo amabwera ndi zovuta zawo ndi zotchinga pamsewu, chikhalidwe cha zovuta zakale ndi zatsopano zaubwenzi zingakhale zosiyana kwambiri, malingana ndi zomwe anthu awiri omwe ali paubwenziwo amawona kuti ndizovuta. Kwa ena, kulephera kufotokoza bwino maganizo awo kapena kulankhulana mogwira mtima kungakhale chimodzi mwazovuta zazikulu zaubwenzi. Kwa ena, kujambula quality 'ife' nthawi ikhoza kukhala nkhani yovuta pakapita nthawi.

Zovuta muubwenzi zingadziwikenso ndi mikhalidwe yanu, chikhalidwe, kakulidwe, zikhalidwe, ndi zolinga zanu. Mwachitsanzo, mavuto omwe amakumana nawo paubwenzi wautali akhoza kukhala osiyana kwambiri ndi a anthu okhalira limodzi. Zovuta zaubwenzi panthawi ya COVID - zomwe zidayambira pakusapeza malo okwanira mpaka kutopa komwe kumatsogolera ku ndewu pafupipafupi komanso kukangana, ndipo nthawi zambiri, ngakhale nkhanza - ndi umboni wakuti mikhalidwe yathu imathandizira kuwongolera thanzi laubwenzi.

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Momwemonso, mavuto a unansi pambuyo pa mwana angakhale osiyana kwambiri ndi amene akumana nawo okwatirana amene angosankha kukhala okha. Mfundo yaikulu ndi yakuti tanthauzo la zovuta muubwenzi limasintha ndikusintha, malingana ndi gawo la moyo lomwe muli, kuti ndinu ndani monga munthu komanso kuti mumakhala bwanji panthawi ya chiyanjano, ndi zomwe mumafunafuna.

Pakati pa mitundu yonseyi, chokhazikika chokha ndikuti zovuta zaubwenzi zimakhalapo panjira iliyonse. Simungathe kuwakhumbira kapena kuwanyalanyaza, ndikuyembekeza kuti atha. Njira yokhayo yothana nawo ndikusintha njira yothana ndi zovuta zaubwenzi popanda kuwalola kuwononga ubale wanu.

Zomwe Zimayambitsa Mavuto a Maubwenzi

Nkhani kapena kusiyana kulikonse pakati pa banja komwe kumayambitsa mikangano, ndewu, mikangano, ndi udani zitha kukhala zoyambitsa mavuto paubwenzi. Monga tanenera kale, nkhani zenizeni zimatha kusiyanasiyana kutengera zinthu zambiri, komabe, zovuta zambiri zaubwenzi ndi chizindikiro cha mfundo zina zaubwenzi wabwino zomwe sizikuyenda bwino kapena kusayenda bwino.

Mpaka zofooka zoyambira izi zitakhazikitsidwa, palibe upangiri wothetsera mavuto paubwenzi womwe ungakuthandizeni kuthetsa kusasangalatsako ndikumanga ubale wokhazikika ndi wogwirizana ndi anzanu. Ichi ndichifukwa chake ndikofunikira kuyang'ana pamwamba ndikuzindikira chomwe chimayambitsa mavuto anu kuti mgwirizano wanu zisawonongeke. maubale oopsa. Tiyeni tiwone zomwe zimayambitsa zovuta zaubwenzi zomwe muyenera kuziyang'anira:

1. Kusalankhulana bwino kumayambitsa mavuto ambiri paubwenzi

Mavuto ambiri olankhulirana amayamba chifukwa cha kusamvana kapena kusalankhulana bwino pakati pa okwatirana. Ngati kuyankhulana kwanu ndi ntchito chabe - mumakambilana za mmene zinthu zilili, mabilu, ndi zinthu zina zofunika tsiku ndi tsiku koma osakhudzana ndi mtima wonse - kapena mumapewa mikangano mpaka mutachita chilichonse kuti musayambitse mkangano ndi mnzanu kapena mosemphanitsa, mukuchita naye. zizindikiro za kuyankhulana koyipa mu ubale.

Zimenezi zingayambitse kusamvana kwakukulu. Ngati okwatirana satha kulankhulana bwino, ngakhale zinthu zing’onozing’ono zingayambitse mavuto m’banja. Chifukwa simumva ndikumvetsetsa kwa okondedwa anu, chilichonse chomwe anganene chikhoza kukupangitsani kuti musinthe. Popeza kuti njira yolankhulirana zakukhosi kwanu popanda kuyambitsa mkangano ilibe kale, kusamvetsetsana kulikonse kungayambitse kuipidwa, motero kungawononge tsogolo la unansiwo.

2. Kusakhulupirirana kungakhale chifukwa chofala cha mikangano muubwenzi

Nkhani zokhulupirirana zimathanso kuyambitsa mavuto pakati pa okwatirana ndipo ndi chimodzi mwa zifukwa zomwe maubwenzi amalephera. Zomwe zimayambitsa nkhani zokhulupirirana zimatha kuyambira kunama ndi kusakhulupirika mpaka nsanje, kukhala ndi chuma, komanso kukhala wotetezedwa kwambiri pachibwenzi. Ziribe kanthu komwe akuchokera, nkhani zodalirika zikayamba, mumayamba kukayikira chilichonse chomwe mnzanuyo akunena kapena kuchita kapena mosemphanitsa.

Mukakayikira ndi kufunsa mnzanuyo, m'pamenenso angamve ngati ali pachibwenzi. Kapena ngati chomwe chimayambitsa kudalirana sichinasinthidwe, zochita za mnzanu zimatha kuyambitsa mantha ndi kusatetezeka kwa yemwe akulimbana ndi kusowa chikhulupiriro mu ubale. Izi zitha kukupangitsani kuti mukule motalikirana, ndikusiyirani mwayi wokumana ndi zovuta zina zambiri zokhudzana ndi bowa.

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3. Mitundu yosiyanasiyana yolumikizira

Ziribe kanthu momwe mumamukondera wokondedwa wanu komanso iwo inu, ubale ukhoza kukhala poyambira mikangano ndi mikangano ngati mawonekedwe anu ogwirizana sakugwirizana. Mwachitsanzo, ngati nonse muli ndi vuto mosatetezeka cholumikizira koma bwenzi limodzi ndi wopewa ndipo wina ambivalent, wina kufunikira kwa malo ndi mtunda ndi kukakamira wina ndi kusowa kungayambitse njira yodzidyetsa yokha ya zovuta.

Mavuto ambiri a ubale, mumkhalidwe wotere, amakhala chifukwa cha kuvina kotentha ndi kozizira pakati pa abwenzi awiriwa, zomwe zikuwoneka kuti sizikutha. Pamapeto pake, okwatirana onsewo akhoza kukhala pa nthawi yotopa kwambiri pamene kukhala pamodzi kumaoneka ngati chinthu chovuta kwambiri kuchita.

4. Kusowa ubwenzi wapamtima

Zosiyana mitundu ya ubwenzi Paubwenzi ali ngati ulusi umene umamangiriza okwatirana pamodzi. Popanda iwo, okwatirana sangathe kulimbikitsa ubale wofunikira kuti ukhale ndi ubale wabwino ndikuyenda pazochitika zosiyanasiyana. Mwachitsanzo, ngati kugonana kwakuthupi kapena kugonana muubwenzi kucheperachepera, okondedwa amatha kukhala ndi milingo ya oxytocin, yomwe imadziwikanso kuti hormone yachikondi yomwe imabweretsa chisangalalo ndikuthandizira kuthana ndi nkhawa.

Izi zitha kuwonetsanso mbali zina za moyo wawo, kuphatikiza momwe amalankhulirana wina ndi mnzake komanso kuthana ndi mavuto awo. Ichi ndi chimodzi mwazinthu zomwe zimayambitsa zovuta zaubwenzi pambuyo pa mwana. Momwemonso, kusowa kwa ubwenzi wapamtima kapena nzeru kungayambitse zovuta zaubwenzi, pamene awiriwa amavutika kuti agwirizanitse zosowa zawo, kufotokoza zofuna zawo, ndi kulingalira zomwe aliyense akufunikira kuti azichita bwino mu chikondi.

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5. Kusalemekezana ndi chimodzi mwa zifukwa zomwe maubwenzi amalephera

Ngati kukopa ndi chikondi zimabweretsa anthu awiri, ulemu umawasunga. Kulemekezana ndi chimodzi mwa mfundo zofunika kwambiri za ubale wabwino, wokhutiritsa komanso wopambana. Ngati palibe, zimakhala zosatheka kuti maanja athetse kusamvana kwawo mwachangu ndi kuthetsa ngakhale nkhani zofunika kwambiri. A kusowa ulemu kaŵirikaŵiri kumayambitsa kunyozedwa, zimene katswiri wodziŵa bwino zamaganizo Dr. John Gottman ananena kuti ndi mmodzi mwa okwera pamahatchi anayi amene amaneneratu kuti ubwenzi wawo udzatha.

Mukapanda kulemekeza okondedwa anu kapena sakulemekezani, simuyamikira malingaliro awo, malingaliro awo kapena ndondomeko yamtengo wapatali kuti muwaganizire popanga zisankho zazikulu kapena zazing'ono. Mumakonda kunyalanyaza wokondedwa wanu ndipo zimawonetsa momwe mumachitira nawo komanso ubale wanu. Ngakhale zing’onozing’ono zingayambitse mavuto m’banja lopanda ulemu.

Kuti mudziwe zambiri zamaubwenzi apabanja, chonde lembani ku athu njira YouTube

11 Mavuto Paubwenzi Pafupifupi Aliyense Ayenera Kukumana Nawo

Samantha ndi Ricky akhala limodzi kwa zaka 15. Kuchokera chibwenzi ngati abwenzi poyenda mumsewu, kulera ana awiri, ndikulimbana ndi mliri pamodzi, ubale wawo wadutsa njira zingapo zazikulu ndikudutsa pamadzi ovuta m'njira. M’kupita kwa nthaŵi, alimbana ndi mavuto ambiri apaubwenzi amene okwatirana ayenera kulimbana nawo. Kuchokera pazovuta zaubwenzi mpaka zovuta zaubwenzi pambuyo pa mwana, zikuwoneka kuti adaziwona zonse.

Amakhulupirira kuti ngakhale zovuta zaubwenzi zomwe okwatirana amakumana nazo m'magawo osiyanasiyana a moyo wawo zikusintha, zovuta zina zazikulu zimakhala gwero lamavuto onse. Malingana ndi Samantha ndi Ricky, kuyesetsa kosalekeza, kulankhulana mwaulemu ndi moona mtima, komanso mtima wosataya mtima ndi zomwe zimafunika kuti tithane ndi zovutazi komanso kuthana ndi namondwe monga gulu.

Ngati maanja angaphunzire kuthana ndi mavutowa akayamba kukhala ndi mavuto atsopano, kuthana ndi zovuta zina kumakhala kosavuta. Kodi zovuta zazikulu zaubwenzi izi ndi chiyani ndipo mungachite chiyani kuti muwathetse? Tidziwe:

1. Kuyankhulana ndi chimodzi mwazovuta zomwe zimachitika paubwenzi

Mawu odziwika bwino oti "kulumikizana ndi kiyi" si mawu opanda pake. Kulankhulana kungakhale kusiyana pakati pa ubale wabwino ndi wodzazidwa ndi kusamvana ndi zopweteka. Koma kulankhulana sikungolankhula. Anthu amatha kulankhula mwachiphamaso koma izi sizingathetse vuto lililonse laubwenzi.

Makamaka mu maubwenzi atsopano, zovuta za kulankhulana zimachuluka. Mukungodziwana ndipo zinthu zitha kuwoneka bwino koma apa ndipamene kulumikizana kuli kofunika kwambiri. Muli mu gawo lachisangalalo chaukwati ndipo ndinu wokonzeka kukhululukira zilizonse zomwe mungakhale mukukumana nazo koma simukuzichitira chifundo ponyalanyaza njovu m'chipindamo.

Geetarsh limati, “Mantha aakulu pankhani ya kulankhulana ndi kusamvetsetseka.” Simukufuna kuwononga chinthu chabwino pofotokoza lingaliro lomwe mukuganiza kuti mnzanuyo sangamvetse, koma apatseni mbiri yokhala womvetsera wabwino kuti akumveni.

Momwe mungagonjetsere nkhani zoyankhulirana muubwenzi

Kulankhulana. Kulankhulana. Kulankhulana. Palibe njira ina yothetsera nkhani zanu ngati banja kusiyana ndi kukhala pansi ndi kukambirana moona mtima, kuyanjanitsa. Chimodzi mwa zifukwa zomwe maubwenzi amalephereka ndikuti nthawi zambiri anthu amangokhalira kusesa nkhani zawo pansi pa kapeti chifukwa choopa kukangana m'malo mongoyang'anizana nazo. Umu ndi momwe mungapewere mbuna yofala iyi:

• M'malo mozengereza kukambitsirana kosalephereka, onetsetsani kuti mukufotokoza malingaliro anu kuti mumange maziko a ubale wolimba.
• Pezani zatsopano zoti muzipewa kutopa mu chiyanjano
• Yesetsani kulankhulana za zofunika za tsiku ndi tsiku kuti mupewe zovuta kuti mugwirizane ndi ubale wautali
• Osamangolankhula zinthu zomwe simukuzikonda, yesetsani kufotokoza zakukhosi kwanu kwa mnzanuyo. Musaganize mopepuka kuti akudziwa momwe mukumvera

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2. Kusakhazikitsa zoyembekeza zenizeni

Izi zitha kukhala zina mwazovuta za ubale wongopanga kapena kutha kwa maanja. Mwangolowa kumene pachibwenzi ndipo muli ndi malingaliro onsewa momwe ziyenera kukhalira. Komabe, anthu sakhala momwe mumayembekezera. Mutha kukonda 90% ya munthu, koma 10% yotsalayo imatha kupanga kusiyana kwakukulu.

Kusiyana pakati pa ubale womwe umakhalapo ndi womwe umatha ndi nthawi ndikutha samalira zoyembekeza moyenerera ndipo vomerezani zomwe zili patsogolo Panu. Palibe amene angagwirizane ndi ndalama za 'mnzanu wangwiro' amene mwamanga m'mutu mwanu.

Ngati mumakhulupirira kuti ubwenziwo ndi wofunika kuchitapo kanthu, ndiye kuti vuto lililonse lingagonjetsedwe. Nditanena izi, zovuta zambiri zaubwenzi kwa maanja zimayamba chifukwa cholephera kuyanjanitsa zabwino ndi zoyipa zomwe onse awiri amabweretsa ku equation.

Momwe mungagonjetsere zoyembekeza zolakwika

Chiyembekezo ndi chimodzi mwazinthu zofunika kwambiri, koma zomwe nthawi zambiri zimanyalanyazidwa, pakumanga ubale wokhalitsa ndi anzanu. Ndicho chifukwa chimodzi mwa malangizo ofunika kwambiri kuthetsa mavuto a ubale omwe tili nawo kwa inu ndi kufotokoza zomwe mukuyembekezera ndikumvetsetsa za mnzanuyo, kuti muthe kupeza njira yoyenera yomwe palibe mnzanuyo amamva kuti simunamvepo kapena simukuwona.

Mosasamala kanthu za jenda, tonsefe tiyenera kulolerana kuti ubale wathu ukhale wopambana.Uku sikungotaya mtima koma kulola kuti ubwenziwo upindule,” akulangiza motero Geetarsh. Umu ndi momwe mungathanirane ndi zomwe mukuyembekezera muubwenzi:

• Dziwani ngati kusiyana kwa ziyembekezo kuli kwakukulu. Ngati sakonda chakudya chofanana ndi inu, siyenera kukhala nkhani yaikulu. Komabe, ngati sakukwaniritsa zomwe mukuyembekezera, imeneyo ndi nkhani ina
• Ngati mnzanuyo sakukwaniritsa zoyembekeza zazing'ono, muyenera kuyesa kumvetsetsa kuti aliyense ali ndi chikhalidwe chosiyana komanso chinenero chachikondi
• Kuyesera kuumba bwenzi lanu mu Baibulo kuti mungakonde sikubweretsa zabwino m'tsogolo
• Dziwani zomwe simungakambirane muubwenzi, funsani mnzanuyo kuti achite chimodzimodzi
• Yesetsani kupeza maziko apakati pomwe nonse mumayesetsa kukwaniritsa zoyembekeza za mnzake zomwe simungakambirane kwinaku mukunyalanyaza zanu zomwe sizofunika.

3. Kukhala woona mtima ndi imodzi mwazovuta zomwe mabanja amakumana nazo

Kuwona mtima kungawoneke ngati kuperekedwa mu ubale uliwonse. Komabe, muzochita, zingakhale zovuta kuposa momwe zikuwonekera. Nthawi zonse mungafune kudziwonetsa bwino kwa anzanu koma izi sizingatheke pakapita nthawi. Kuchita chilungamo ndi wokondedwa wanu kumayala maziko a ubale wabwino. Simungakhale patsamba lomwe nthawi zonse koma, bola ngati muli oona mtima mutha kubweretsa umunthu wanu weniweni ku mgwirizano.

Anthu ambiri amakumana ndi vutoli chifukwa amawona kuti sangathe kukhala pachiwopsezo ndi okondedwa awo. Komabe, izi kusaona mtima pachibwenzi zimangoyamba kuzungulira koyipa. Mumayamba kusaona mtima chifukwa muli ndi zinthu zomwe mumafuna kubisa koma izi zimakukakamizani kumabodza ena omwe pamapeto pake amamanga khoma pakati pa inu ndi wokondedwa wanu.

Ndanena izi, m'pofunikanso kumvetsetsa tanthauzo la kukhala woona mtima paubwenzi. Geetarsh anati: “Kukhala umwini ndi katundu n’zosiyana ndi kusamala, mnzanuyo ayenera kusamala za inu ndi kukufunsani za moyo wanu koma sayenera kudziona kuti ali ndi ufulu wodziwa zimene mukunena,” akutero Geetarsh.

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Momwe mungagonjetsere kusowa kukhulupirika muubwenzi

Kukhala woona mtima kungakhale chimodzi mwa zinthu zofunika kwambiri zoyembekeza muubwenzi, komabe, kukhala mogwirizana ndi izo kungakhale kovuta kwambiri kuposa momwe anthu ambiri amaganizira. Mabodza ang'onoang'ono opanda vuto nthawi zonse amawoneka ngati njira yabwinoko pokambirana zovuta. Pazimenezi, Geetarsh anati: “Okwatirana ayenera kukhala okonzeka kuvomereza kuti kusapeza bwino m’kukambitsirana n’kwabwino ndiponso n’kofunika kuti akule.” Khalani okhwima maganizo ndi kukambirana nkhani zanu m’malo momangokhalira kukhudzidwa ndi nkhaniyo. kusunthitsa mlandu.” Umu ndi momwe mungathandizire kulimbikitsa kukhulupirika kwakukulu muubwenzi:

• Yesetsani kuchita chilungamo ndi mnzanuyo
• M’malo mouza mnzanu zimene akufuna kumva kapena zimene mukuganiza kuti akuchita, muuzeni mmene mukumvera
• Limbikitsani chidaliro mu ubalewo mwa kukhala omasuka komanso obwera pogawana zambiri
• Yesetsani kuchita zinthu moonekera kwambiri ndikupatsa mnzanu mwayi wopezeka pazinthu zosiyanasiyana za moyo wanu kuti atsimikizire kuti mulibe chobisala.

4. Nkhani za m'banja zimatha kusokoneza

Aliyense amadziwa kuti kukumana ndi makolo kungakhale gawo lovuta kwambiri la ubale uliwonse. Zimasonyeza mlingo wa kudzipereka dziwitsani okondedwa anu kwa banja lanu. Kupatula apo, iwo ndi anthu ofunika m'moyo wanu. Izi zikugwira ntchito kwa onse awiri.

Ngakhale pambuyo pa mawu oyamba, pangakhale kukangana pakati pa banja ndi mnzanuyo. Mwina sakuvomereza okondedwa wanu pazifukwa zina kapena mnzanuyo akhoza kusiyana maganizo ndi iwo. Mulimonse momwe zingakhalire, zitha kukuyikani pamalo olimba kuti musunge mzere pakati pa mbali ziwirizo, ndikupangitsa kuti ikhale imodzi mwazovuta zatsopano zaubwenzi.

Momwe mungagonjetsere mavuto am'banja

Banja likhoza kukhala nkhani yokhudza mtima pakati pa anthu okwatirana ngati silinasamalidwe bwino. Kuti mupewe kusiyana pakati pa banja la mnzanuyo kuti zisasinthe kukhala magwero a mikangano yosalekeza, muyenera kukhala ndi malire abwino pakati pa kuima nokha ndi kulemekeza banja la mnzanuyo. Umu ndi momwe:

• Kumbukirani kuti simungasangalatse aliyense nthawi zonse. Nthawi zina mudzayenera kutenga mbali imodzi kapena ina kutengera mutuwo
• Komabe, izi sizikukupatsani chilolezo chochitira mwano kapena kukhumudwitsa. Muyenera kuwongolera momwe mumaperekera malingaliro anu
• Onetsetsani kuti muli ndi kusagwirizana pa nkhani yomwe muli nayo ndipo mutenge nkhani zakale
• Musalole kuti nkhaniyo ipite patsogolo ndi kukhala ndewu wamba pa makhalidwe a anthu okhudzidwawo
• Aliyense amene akukhudzidwa adziwe kuti maganizo anu ndi ongotengera zomwe zili munkhaniyo

5. Ndalama zitha kukhala gwero la zovuta za ubale

M’maubwenzi ambiri, pamakhala kusiyana m’njira zimene okondedwa aliyense amathandizira. Mwina mmodzi wa inu amapeza ndalama, pamene wina amathandiza kunyumba. Ngakhale onse awiri akupeza ndalama, yemwe ali ndi malipiro ochulukirapo amatha kutenga gawo limodzi la ndalama zomwe amawononga, ndiyeno anganene za kasamalidwe ka ndalama.

Kapena maganizo a onse awiri pa kusunga ndi kugwiritsira ntchito ndalama angakhale osiyana kwambiri, zomwe zimachititsa kuti muzikangana nthawi zonse pazandalama komanso kupangitsa kuti chibwenzicho chivutike. kusakhulupirika pazachuma. Mofananamo, kukhala ndi moyo ndi ndalama zolipirira limodzi chifukwa chakuti kholo limodzi liyenera kutenga nthaŵi yopuma kuntchito kungabweretse mavuto ambiri paubwenzi pambuyo pa mwana.

Mwachidule, ndalama zitha kukhala gwero lamavuto amtundu uliwonse waubwenzi, zomwe ngati siziyankhidwa moyenera zitha kukhala zovuta. Geetarsh akuti: “Palibe amene ali pachibwenzi amene ayenera kupambana kapena kugonja.

Momwe mungagonjetsere nkhani zachuma paubwenzi

Kulimbana ndi zovuta zaubwenzi za chikhalidwe chofewa chotere kumafuna kusamalira mosamala. Ngati muwona kukwiya muubwenzi wanu, ichi ndi njira yanu yothanirana ndi vutolo. Zoonadi, onse awiri ayenera kuthandizira mofanana pa chiyanjano koma nthawi zambiri imabwera nthawi yomwe wina akuchita zambiri chifukwa cha zochitika. Umu ndi momwe mungapewere mkangano wachuma kuwononga ubale wanu muzochitika zotere:

• Pezani njira yothandizirana wina ndi mzake. Ngati m’modzi sakupeza ndalama zochuluka, atha kuyesetsa kuthandiza m’njira zina pozindikira kuti ngati nsapatoyo ili pa phazi lina, mnzakeyo angachitenso chimodzimodzi.
• Nthawi zonse khalani patsogolo pazomwe muli nazo ndi ngongole zanu komanso kuchuluka kwa momwe mungathandizire paubwenzi/ukwati komanso zomwe mumagawana
• Musayese kulamulira chuma cha mnzanuyo ndipo musawapatse ufulu wolamulira wanu
• Gwiritsani ntchito nthawi ndi khama pokonzekera bwino zachuma kuti mukwaniritse zolinga zanu zomwe munagawana komanso zapayekha ndipo palibe mnzanu amene angamve ngati wapatsidwa kachidutswa kakang'ono ka ndodo.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: 25 Mavuto Ofala Paubwenzi

6. Kusowa malo aumwini mu chiyanjano

Mwina simuganizira za malo tsiku ndi tsiku. Ndi chinthu chomwe nthawi zambiri timachiwona mopepuka tikakhala nacho. Komabe, mukayamba kukhala ndi munthu ndikugawana malo, mumakakamizika kukayikira kuti ndi malo angati omwe inu ndi mnzanuyo mumafunikira.

Mwachitsanzo, mwina mwangosamukira kumene m'nyumba yatsopano ndi mnzanu. Mikangano yatha malo aumwini mu chiyanjano Zitha kuchitika chifukwa cha chilichonse chifukwa chosowa malo okwanira obisala mpaka osapeza nthawi yokhayokha yopumula pambuyo pa tsiku lalitali lantchito.

Choyipa chachikulu, mulingo wa chitonthozo ukhoza kukhala wosiyana kwa aliyense. Mutha kukhala okhutitsidwa ndi zovala zawo pamalo anu, koma mwina sangakhale okonzeka kuchitapo kanthu. Nkhani ya malo amunthu yakhalanso m'gulu lamavuto omwe amatsogolera paubwenzi nthawi ya COVID, yolimbikitsidwa ndi maanja akukakamizika kukhala m'malo awo okhala kwa miyezi ingapo.

Momwe mungagonjetsere nkhani za malo aumwini

Imodzi mwa malangizo othandiza kwambiri othetsera mavuto paubwenzi ndi kupeza malo apakati, ogwirizana omwe amakwaniritsa zosowa za onse awiri komanso zosowa zawo monga banja. Lamuloli limagwiranso ntchito pazovuta za malo aumwini mu ubale. Umu ndi momwe mungakhazikitsire bwino:

• Khalani ndi okondedwa wanu ndikufotokozera zomwe danga ndi 'nthawi yanga' zimatanthauza kwa inu panokha
• Kenako ganizirani momwe mungagwirizanitse ziwirizi kuti mupange masomphenya ogawana momwe malo abwino muubwenzi akuyenera kuwoneka.
• Osakwiyira wokondedwa wanu chifukwa chofuna malo ena pachibwenzi; gwiritsani ntchito nthawiyi kukulitsa luso lanu, zokonda zanu komanso moyo wanu wamagulu
• Yesetsani kuika patsogolo nthawi yanu pamodzi kuti malo asayambe kumva ngati mawu oipa muubwenzi wanu.

7. Kusamalira nthawi (kapena kusowa kwake)

Nthawi ndi chida chochepa. Popeza moyo wathu uli wofulumira, sekondi iliyonse yakhala chinthu chamtengo wapatali chongogwiritsidwa ntchito pazinthu zopindulitsa kwambiri. Ndicho chifukwa chake, pankhani ya ubale, zimakhala zovuta kugawa nthawi pazinthu zonse zomwe zikufunika chisamaliro. Ntchito ndi zinthu zina zimatha kutenga nthawi yambiri komanso mphamvu zambiri, zomwe zimakupangitsani kumva kuti mulibe mphamvu. Izi zitha kupangitsa kuti abwenzi apatukane, kuwapangitsa kumva kuti akucheperachepera pakulumikizana tsiku lililonse.

Kutalikirana kumeneku kumatha kukhala gwero la zovuta zina zambiri muubwenzi. Kusamalira nthawi ndikuwonetsetsa kuti mukulumikizana wina ndi mnzake, mwatanthauzo komanso moganizira - popanda zododometsa kapena zoyesayesa zapamtima - zilinso m'gulu lazovuta zaubwenzi wautali.

Momwe mungagonjetsere kusowa kwa nthawi yabwino

Kuti tithane ndi vutoli, ndikofunikira kuti tisaiwale kuti kulumikizana ndi chikondi zimafunikira nthawi yodzipatulira kuti mukhale ndi ubale wolimba. Geetarsh anati: “Nthawi yolankhulana bwino ndiyofunika kwambiri.” Simungapange unansi wokhalitsa popanda kuwononga nthaŵi ndi khama,” anatero Geetarsh.

• Pezani nthawi yabwino kwa wokondedwa wanu tsiku lililonse ndikuigwiritsa ntchito kuchita zomwe zimakuthandizani kumanga ubwenzi wapamtima
• Bwerani ndi miyambo yaubwenzi monga kupita koyenda limodzi kapena mlungu ndi mlungu tsiku usiku kuti mukhale ndi nthawi yabwino wina ndi mzake
• Chotsani zosokoneza zonse ndikuyang'ana kwambiri mnzanu panthawiyi
• Onani zochitika ndi zokonda zomwe mungagwirizane nazo

8. Kulephera kumvera ena chisoni

Chifundo ndi chimodzi mwa zinthu zofunika kwambiri pa ubale uliwonse. Komabe, izi zitha kukhala zochepa pakapita nthawi. Pali zinthu zambiri zokha zomwe tingasamalire tsiku ndi tsiku, ndipo pakapita nthawi, mnzanuyo akhoza kutsika pamndandanda umenewo komanso mosiyana. Kupanda chifundo Zitha kusokoneza ubale wanu, ndikupangitsa kuti inu ndi mnzanuyo mulekanitse.

Wokondedwa wanu angakhale atagwira ntchito mwakhama, ndikutsatiridwa ndi ulendo wautali, ndipo akuyembekeza kuti musangalale nawo. Komabe, mwakhalanso ndi tsiku lalitali komanso lotopetsa, mwina ntchito yanu sinathe. Zikatere, zingakhale zovuta kumvera chisoni munthu wina m’malo mongoganizira zofuna zanu. Nthawi zina, mutha kumumverabe chisoni munthuyo koma osatha kufotokoza chifukwa cha zovuta zina zomwe zimakutengerani malo.

Mmene mungagonjetsere kupanda chifundo

Ngati mukuona kuti n’zovuta kusamalira mavuto m’moyo wa mnzanu, yang’anani m’kati kuti mupeze vuto. Kodi mumafunabe kuwamvera chisoni kapena zikuwoneka kuti sizoyenera kuyesetsa? Ngati mukutsimikiza kuti mukufunabe kukhala pachibwenzi, ndiye yesani kuchita zinthu zing'onozing'ono kuti musonyeze kuti mukuganiza za nkhani zawo ndipo muli ndi ndalama zothandizira mnzanuyo kuzithetsa.

“Musamangoganizira kwambiri za vuto, koma yesetsani kuthetsa vutolo,” akulangiza motero Geetarsh. Nayi momwe mungathandizire kukulitsa chifundo mu ubale wanu:

• Yesetsani kukulitsa kulankhulana muubwenzi wanu kuti muthandize kumvetsetsa bwino wokondedwa wanu
• Kupanda chifundo kungakhale chotulukapo cha mkwiyo wozama. Muyenera kuchitapo kanthu kuti muthe kumva chisoni ndi mnzanuyo
• Lekani kuimba mlandu wokondedwa wanu popanda kuyesetsa kumvetsetsa mbali yake
• Funsani mafunso, yesetsani kumvetsera mwachidwi kuti mumve chisoni ndi mnzanuyo

Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kupanda Chikondi Ndi Ubwenzi Wapamtima - Njira 9 Zomwe Zimakukhudzani

9. Kuchepa kwa ubwenzi ndi chimodzi mwazovuta kwambiri za ubale

Mosiyana ndi zimene anthu ambiri amakhulupirira, ndi kupanda ubwenzi kuposa kusamvana komwe kumapangitsa maanja kupatukana. Mwina mwakhala limodzi kwa zaka zingapo. Kuyambira kukhala womasuka, mumapita kukhala osasamala mu ubale, ndipo musanadziwe, motowo wazima. Zikatero, zimakhala zovuta kuyesetsa kukhalabe pachibwenzi.

Kukondana sikumangokhudza kugonana kapena kugonana kwa anthu awiri, komanso kugawana chiopsezo ndi kukhala ogwirizana m'maganizo. Chimodzi mwazovuta zazikulu zaubwenzi kwa maanja omwe akhala limodzi kwa nthawi yayitali ndikupitiliza kulimbikitsa maubwenzi osiyanasiyana mu ubale wawo.

Mukuyembekezera kuti mnzanuyo aganize kuti mudakali ndi chikondi chofanana ndi chomwe munali nacho mutangoyamba chibwenzi, koma izi ziyenera kufotokozedwa kudzera m'mawu ndi zochita.

Momwe mungagonjetsere kusowa kwa ubwenzi muubwenzi

Kusowa paubwenzi, kuthupi kapena kugonana makamaka, kungakhale pakati pa zovuta zaubwenzi pambuyo pa mwana kapena muubwenzi wanthawi yayitali. Ubwenzi ukayamba kuchepa kumbali imodzi, ena amatsatira. Kupanda kugonana, mwachitsanzo, kungapangitse okondedwa kutalikirana m'malingaliro ndi mosemphanitsa. Umu ndi momwe mungapewere chibwenzi kuti chisachoke mu equation yanu:

• Phatikizani mnzanu muzochitika zazikulu ndi zosankha pamoyo wanu, gawanani nawo malingaliro anu, malingaliro anu, ndi zokhumba zanu
• Atsegulireni zakukhosi kwanu ndipo khalani omvera akamachita chimodzimodzi. Izi zikusonyeza kuti mumawayamikira komanso maganizo awo.
• Yesetsani kupanga ma equation atsopano mu mgwirizano womwe ulipo
• Kukonzekera mausiku amasiku ndi kuyanjana zatsopano ndi njira yabwino yosungira chikondi, chikondi, ndi ubwenzi wamoyo.

10. Kukangana kumayamba kusokoneza

Kukangana kungakhale kovuta pa ubale uliwonse. Palibe amene amafuna kukangana, makamaka pachibwenzi pamene nonse mumasamala za wina ndi mzake; komabe, mikangano ndi kusiyana maganizo kulinso kosapeŵeka pamene anthu aŵiri asonkhana pamodzi kuti agawane ulendo monga okwatirana.

Liwu lililonse la acerbic limatha kuvulaza kwambiri ndipo mutha kuchita chilichonse kuti mupewe. Komabe, mikangano ndi nsonga chabe ya madzi oundana, yomwe ikapanda kuthetsedwa ikhoza kutsegula zipata za kusefukira kwa mavuto aakulu. Ichi chimakhala chimodzi mwazovuta kwambiri zaubwenzi kwa maanja, makamaka ngati sakudziwa bwino njira zothetsera mikangano kuthetsa mikangano popanda kuwononga mgwirizano wawo.

Momwe mungagonjetsere mikangano muubwenzi

Chinsinsi chothana ndi zovuta zaubwenzi pomwe mukusemphana maganizo ndikuti musaiwale kuti mnzanuyo akutanthauza chiyani kwa inu. Kulimbana m’chibwenzi kungathandize kuchichirikiza, ngati onse awiri adziwa momwe angathetsere kusiyana kwawo mwaumoyo. Umu ndi momwe mungawonetsetse kuti izi ndikupewa mikangano kuti isawononge tsogolo lanu ngati banja:

• Taonani chifukwa chake mkanganowo unayambira
• Ngati nkhaniyo ndi yaikulu, muyenera kupeza gwero lake ndi kuithetsa
• Kumbali ina, ngati nkhaniyo ndi yaying'ono, muyenera kudzifufuza ngati mukusunga chakukhosi, zomwe zikukupangitsani kuti muyambe kuchita zinthu mopanda malire.
• Osasesa nkhani zing'onozing'ono pansi pa kapeti, izi zimakhala ndi njira yowunjikirana ndikukweza mitu yawo yoyipa ngati mikangano yoyipa yaubwenzi.
• Nthawi zonse chepetsa mkangano wanu pa nkhani yomwe muli nayo, musalole kuti iphulike mopanda malire kapena mugwiritse ntchito ngati mwayi woponyera mthunzi kwa mnzanu pazomwe adachita miyezi kapena zaka zapitazo.
• Konzani kusamvana bwino, osatchulana mayina, kutukwana kapena chinyengo monga kugenda mwala ndi kulankhula mwakachetechete.

Kuwerenga Kofanana: 11 Zotsutsana za Ubale Zomwe Zimatanthauza Chiwonongeko Pa Bond Yanu

11. Kukhulupirirana mu maubwenzi

Monga momwe anthu ambiri angachitire umboni, kukhulupirirana ndiye maziko a ubale uliwonse wabwino. Komabe kudziwa kuti mutha kukhulupirira wokondedwa wanu kuti ali ndi nsana ngakhale pamavuto ndi ena mwamavuto omwe mabanja ambiri amalimbana nawo. Panthawi imodzimodziyo, kusowa kukhulupirirana pakati pa okondedwa kungayambitse kusatetezeka, kukayikirana ndi chiyanjano komwe mumayang'ana nthawi zonse paphewa lanu, kuopa kuti mnzanuyo adzakubayani kumbuyo.

Ngati pali kusakhulupirirana muubwenzi, ndiye kuti zingangobweretsa kusakhutira ndi mkwiyo. Muyenera kukhulupirira kuti mnzanuyo adzakhalapo kwa inu ndipo sangakuperekeni inu. Pokhapokha mutha kukhala ndi kupita patsogolo kulikonse mu ubale.

Momwe mungagonjetsere nkhani zodalirika

Ngati mukumva kuti alipo nkhani za trust pakati pa inu ndi wokondedwa wanu, ndi nthawi yoti muwunikire chomwe chayambitsa. Zingakhale chifukwa chakuti mmodzi wa inu sangathe kusunga malonjezo kapena kunamapo m’mbuyomo. Kuti mukonzenso, muyenera kuyesetsa kumanganso kudalira maubwenzi, motere:

• Yesetsani kulankhulana momasuka komanso moona mtima kuti mnzanuyo adziwe zomwe mukuganiza / momwe mukumvera
• Onetsetsani kuti mwasunga mawu anu
• Chotsani njira yanu kuti muwapangitse kumva ngati angadalire pa inu
• Osabisira mnzanu zinthu, ngakhale ziwoneke ngati zazing'ono kapena zosafunika
• Pewani machitidwe omwe adayambitsa kusakhulupirirana muubwenzi wanu

Palibe ubale womwe ulibe zovuta komanso zovuta. Kulimbana ndi zovuta zaubwenzi ndi vuto la tsiku ndi tsiku ndipo liyenera kuthetsedwa molunjika. Ngati muli ndi kulimba mtima ndi kulimbikira kuona m'mbuyo nkhanizi ndi kuthana nazo mwaumoyo, ndiye kuti ndinu sitepe imodzi pafupi ndi ubale wabwino.

Ngakhale mutakhala kuti mwathedwa nzeru ndi zovuta zomwe mukukumana nazo paubwenzi, musataye chiyembekezo. Alangizi odziwa bwino ntchito komanso ovomerezeka pagulu la Bonobology athandiza maanja ambiri omwe ali mumikhalidwe yofanana. Nanunso mutha kugwiritsa ntchito malangizo awo akatswiri kuti muwongolere ubale wanu kunjira ina. Thandizo loyenera ndi a dinani kutali.

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Zopereka zanu sizikupanga zachifundo Mphatso. Zilola kuti Bonobology ipitilize kukubweretserani zidziwitso zatsopano komanso zaposachedwa pakufuna kwathu kuthandiza aliyense padziko lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.