While you sit and wallow in the misery of your latest breakup wondering if there is a way to rekindle the romance with your ex, what if we told you that you can use 3 texts to get him back? Yep! That’s the power of communication. With the right words, timing, and a few other tricks, you can craft the perfect message which could make him come back to you.
How To Get Your Ex Back By Text Message – 3 Powerful Texts
In today’s day and age where patience is depleting, relationships end in the blink of an eye. But if you have had the time to contemplate your breakup (read: you still think about your ex), have realized what went wrong, and now want to know how to get him back, it is time to whip out the best weapon in your arsenal: text messages.
Texting has evolved from a secondary to a primary form of communication, especially in relationships. Here is a simple rule of 3 Rs to follow to increase your chances of getting back to your partner – remind, remember, and reminisce. I’ll explain more as you keep reading. So here they are, the 3 texts to get him back in your life:
Related Reading: How Guys Text When They Like You – We Give You 15 Clues
1. The reminder text
There are many sweet things to say to your ex-boyfriend to get him back but hold your horses. Assuming you and your beloved (ex) have not been in contact since the breakup, this is one of the 3 texts to get him back. It simply needs to be a positive reminder of you.
Send him a short and sweet text which requires no response, so he doesn’t feel compelled to start a conversation. I advise staying away from standard texts like “How are you?” and “What’s happening?” Your ex could feel a little uneasy with these. He has no idea if you are extending an invitation to chat or if you are about to attack him. A shared memory or experience is a better method to rekindle the romance.
Sarah, 31, is a paralegal in Seattle. She shares her experience of how she used texts to get back with her boyfriend. She says, “Sending him a text to remind him of a play he was looking forward to was what started our conversation. He not only thanked me for the reminder but also asked me to join him for the play!”
Or, if you know that your ex is a huge fan of Coldplay, you can send him a text like: “Hey, I heard Coldplay is coming to town. I remember how much you wanted to see them perform live. Thought I’d give you a heads-up. We missed it the last time because of that conference you had to go to. Hope you catch them this time!”
In the pursuit of how to get your ex back fast by text message, don’t forget that the person on the other side might not be prepared to get back to you. Sending flirty texts to get him back can have negative repercussions, especially if you haven’t been in touch for a while.
Here is another example of a simple reminder message: “Remember how afraid I was of water and you would push me to try swimming? Today, I tried it for the first time! Just wanted to thank you for motivating me.”
These are merely reminders to let your ex know that, even though you haven’t been in contact, he occasionally enters your thoughts. Of course, it can be difficult to change your ex’s opinion of you, especially if your relationship ended badly. But if you both civilly parted ways and you want to know how to get him back, sending him a reminder text may be the answer.
You are also using the 12-word text theory here. Developed by James Bauer in his book, His Secret Obsession, the 12-word text is where you instigate the hero instinct of a man. You either seek his advice, ask him to rescue you, or let him know how he has been useful to you. When you send him a text saying he helped you get over your fear of water, you are pressing the hero button which will make him feel wanted.
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2. The remember text
This is the second phase of 3 texts to get him back. This type of text message will solicit a response, as opposed to the reminder text message. The sole intention of sending such a message is to remind your ex
of an experience you shared. This is the space where you can easily think of many sweet things to say to your ex-boyfriend to get him back.
But being subtle while sending this kind of text is crucial during the many stages of getting back with an ex. You do not want to overwhelm him. Whatever you decide, make sure to pick a memory that will stick out and evoke strong feelings in your ex. It might be a road trip you took together or perhaps a nice anniversary dinner you shared.
The next step is to refer to that memory by posing a query about it. For instance, if during your road trip you discovered a secret beach, or spent a weekend away and visited a fantastic cafe, those are the things you’re going to ask him about. Here’s an example of how to make him come back fast by structuring the text in the right way:
“Hey, you. Remember we went for a long drive once and got lost? What was the name of that cafe we ended up discovering? The one that had those insane pancakes which you could not stop eating. My sister is coming to town and I wanted to take her to that place. Let me know if you remember the name. (insert smiley emoji)”
Not only are you subtle, (you do not want to give away that you regret breaking up with him) but you have also reminded him of a beautiful experience that will induce nostalgia. You have also given him a topic to ask a follow-up question about. He might end up asking you about your sister, leading to a conversation.
Want another example of how to make him come back fast? My best friend is a testimony to the efficiency of remember texts. She says, “I asked him about the place he took me once for a special jazz night. Something must have worked because he asked me who I was going with. When I mentioned it was just a friend, he asked if he could tag along. And the rest is history.”
As mentioned before, you should inquire about a very special, one-of-a-kind experience. Don’t ask him about the restaurant you both used to eat at every week because that is something he would expect you to know. And such a question might even reveal your intentions. Still wondering how to get your ex back fast by text message? Here is another example for you:
“Hi! I know this is out of the blue but there was this bakery from which you got me that lemon cake one time. Do you remember its name and location? I’m throwing a baby shower for my boss and she has requested a lemon cake. I was hoping I could get it from the same place. You’d be saving my life if you remember the name!”
As you’ll see in these two instances, you’re giving your ex the chance to text you back by asking him to think back on a memorable experience you two shared. If he does end up replying, just revert with a simple thank you, and then wait. Again, you are using the 12-word text to get him back because you are seeking his help, thus activating the hero instinct in your ex.
Related Reading: 23 Things To Text When A Conversation Dies
3. The reminisce text
This brings us to the third part of our 3 texts to get him back as your partner. Sending a reminiscence text message is likely to elicit a response since they are so intensely emotional and potent. For this reason, it is advisable to hold off sending one until you have spoken to your ex at least a few times.
The trick is to recall a sensuous moment you shared in as much detail as you can before you write it down in a reminiscing text. Maybe you had a steamy makeout session in the rain, or maybe you spent the evening cuddled up in each other’s arms in front of a fire. This is one of the 3 texts to get him back where there is no right or wrong message; only one that will make his mind race.
To know how to get your ex back fast by text message, you can send something to him like this: “I can’t stop thinking about the time when we….” Take it forward from here and reminisce about a deeply personal memory. It does not necessarily have to be sensual. If the two of you shared more than a vanilla relationship, you can reminisce about something you loved doing only with each other.
The reminiscence message can work like magic when done right. Jonah, 29, shares their experience. “It was raining one night and I messaged my ex about how I miss our long drives in the rain which were always followed by a movie by the fireplace and some romantic time between the sheets. An hour later, he was at my door!”
This brings us to an important point. When sending a reminisce message, be detail-oriented. Include all the positive memories and omit the negative ones. If you do it right, your ex will start to miss you and wonder if calling it quits was such a good idea. They’ll start to miss you.
- Do not overwhelm your ex with too many messages. Take it slow
- Send him a ‘reminder text’ to remind him of an event he was planning to go for
- Send a casual ‘remember text’ to ask him a question from a time that was special for the both of you
- Send a detailed ‘reminisce text’ to make him miss the intimacy he shared with you
- Use the 12-word text to trigger his hero instinct for a faster response
So, will you try these 3 texts to get him back? Remember to be patient and prepare for disappointment as well because he might have moved on from you. There are many flirty texts to get him back but the ones which work are those that make him rethink the breakup decision. Hence, choose your words wisely because that’s all you got!
The 12-word text is a theory developed by James Bauer that talks about how to instigate a man’s hero instinct by texting him. There are 12 steps to follow while you type a message and with those steps in mind, you can craft the perfect message to get him to obsess over you.
When trying to get your ex to miss you, the key is to let him think you don’t. Follow a no-contact rule for a while and when you do come in contact with him, make him realize how happy and content you are in your life. Seeing that you are happy without him will make him miss you more.