Q: I am depressed since last month because my girlfriend has pulled away due to some misunderstandings. I tried a lot to talk to her and fix the issues, but the problem is that she is not agreeing to talk to me. She doesn’t even respond to my SMSes. I really don’t know what to do. Please advise me.
A: Hi, I’m very sorry to hear that you’re having to go through this difficult phase in your relationship. It can really hurt when someone we love shuts us out. But unfortunately, right now there isn’t much you can do because she is keeping her distance. Try the following pointers and if these don’t work either, it’s time to let it be for a while and hope for time to smooth things over.
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• Write out a sincere, no-nonsense heartfelt apology for whatever caused the misunderstanding. Don’t use it to explain yourself and how you didn’t know/couldn’t help it/she should understand. Instead own up that you made a mistake, you have realised it and will try your best to not repeat it if she can help you figure out what not to do next time.
• Don’t go over the same points over and over again in your messages.
• Use clear, short and meaningful sentences
• Tell her you understand she needs space to weigh her options and that you’re giving it to her but you’re here when/if she decides to come back
• Then leave her alone for some time. Give her time to process her anger and cool down.
I hope this helps! All the best!