17 Signs You Are Dating An Alpha Woman

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alpha woman

Who hasn’t heard of alpha males? A strong, dominant, socially, and physically powerful man who seems to have the world in his grasp is a common occurrence. But when it comes to an alpha woman, imagining a strong and independent female figure is not something that comes easily to us.

Popularized after the feminist movement in the 1960s, the ‘alpha woman’ is a phenomenon that is still breaking economic and social barriers. But who is she? And how do you know if you’re dating an alpha woman? 

According to this research, alpha women have intrinsic traits of being competitive, controlling, and aggressive. They are natural leaders and bring out the best qualities in the people around them. There’s a lot more to these women though. This is why we bring to you 17 signs you are dating an alpha woman. 

17 Signs You Are Dating An Alpha Woman

Like alpha males, alpha women have certain personality traits that can be spotted from a mile away. Personal independence, mental strength, passion, and confidence – these are a few signs of alpha females. They work hard to be the best in their chosen fields. They have a certain aura of strength and authority and tend to be headstrong. These traits can make them very sexy and alluring.

However, here’s what you need to keep in mind while dating an alpha woman. An alpha female trait in relationships is that she does not tolerate chauvinism, mansplaining, or someone trying to dominate her. So then, do alpha women stay single? Only if their choice is between dating someone insecure and not dating at all. Read on to know the signs you’re dating an independent lady like her.

1. She is unapologetically successful

For an alpha woman, success is one of the most essential parameters in her life. It takes a really secure person to be in a relationship with a successful woman. But you will never find an alpha woman rubbing her success in your face. Instead, she will share her joy with you.

In a study conducted by Stanford Graduate School of Business, researchers found that women need to unfairly strike a balance between being self-confident and dominant, essentially being ‘masculine’, while also self-monitoring their behavior and adapting to occasions according to necessity. This is a classic trait of successful alpha women wherein they mold themselves according to situations.

Related Reading: Dating An Independent Woman- 15 Things You Should Know

2. Her confidence is contagious 

“My girlfriend owns a small business of scented candles,” says Richard, a reader from Los Angeles. “She is extremely driven and confident even in the face of failure, making her the perfect archetype for an alpha woman. My friends ask me, “What is it like dating an alpha female?” And the answer I always have for them is “incredibly uplifting”. 

“Her undying optimism and confidence are two of the best things about her. Being around her makes me feel motivated in my life too.” Richard’s story is a perfect example of how alpha females in relationships enrich the lives of their partners.

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3. She has a magnetic personality

In today’s world, networking is one of the most critical activities a person can do. And one alpha female trait in relationships, or otherwise, is the magnetic personality that she exhibits. People tend to pay attention to powerful women for their strength, self-respect, and confidence. You’ll often find people gravitating toward her, not because she exhibits any attention-seeking behaviors but because she demands it. Her presence in the limelight adds to her charm. 

4. She exhibits alpha female traits in bed

Here’s why dating an alpha woman is the best. She has no trouble initiating sex. She is accustomed to pursuing her goals. A man will enjoy dating an alpha woman who is at ease and secure about her sexuality because men are typically the ones who initiate romance and intimacy. While usually men take the control in the bedroom, when women do it, men adore it.

When an alpha female falls in love, her affections are channeled in the bedroom too. If you find your woman being sexually voracious, dominant, and regularly initiating sex, it’s a clear sign you’re dating someone who exhibits alpha female traits in bed.

5. She is competitive

When it comes to alpha women, competition is a part and parcel of their lives. It ties directly with the need to prove themselves. A competitive spirit in all aspects of their lives is a strong sign of alpha females.

A busy and demanding career, extracurricular interests, a lively social life, and obligations to her family are the typical responsibilities of this powerful woman. This implies that she won’t be able to give you large portions of her routine every day, and won’t expect you to do the same for her.

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6. She sets her own priorities

Therefore, avoid engaging her in a “Why am I not your priority?” debate. The majority of alpha females are career or goal-oriented. If they have their hearts set on anything, they will prioritize it and work tirelessly to see it through, no matter what. 

Supporting her as she works toward her goals is the best course of action. You will find that insecure women seldom make for stong, independent individuals. If you’re wondering, “What is it like dating an alpha female who sets her own priorities?”, keep in mind that even if she might be unable to offer you constant attention, you are still an essential part of her life.

7. She is resourceful and great at planning

Men have a tendency to not pay much attention to detail. Since time immemorial, women have always been tasked with events that require extensive planning. Therefore, birthday parties, special dinners, and vacations are typically planned by women. 

Planning is something that an alpha woman excels at. She has the connections to gain access to elite venues, will bargain for the lowest prices, and won’t wait for you to contact the airline when a flight is canceled. She’s already on top of it and is asking for reimbursement and free flights. When you have an alpha female in a relationship, you can be sure that she won’t leave any stone unturned to make the best plans for both of you.

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8. She owns who she is

Let’s face it – one of the crowning traits of powerhouse women is their outright self-awareness. You will never find an alpha woman who is apologetic about her personality and choices. And why should she be? 

Alicia, a 25-year-old artist from London, shares, “Jess and I have been dating for 4 years and in that entire duration, there hasn’t been one instance where she has changed herself to conform to someone’s ideal of her. Her utter belief in being the best person she can possibly be is what endears her to me.”

couple dynamics

9. She has alpha female weaknesses

Since nothing is flawless, what are a few alpha female weaknesses? Alpha women could neglect to take some time to unwind, which can significantly raise stress levels. They might work or socialize too much due to their ambitious nature. As a result, they are at risk of burnout. 

Another flaw is their tendency to be somewhat stubborn. They know what they want and will go to great lengths to achieve it, so when things don’t go according to plan, they can become quite irate. 

These are some of the alpha female traits you need to watch out for in order to better take care of your partner or to anticipate her reactions.

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10. She has high emotional intelligence

It is no secret that powerful women are high in emotional intelligence. She is able to identify and comprehend both her own emotions as well as those of others. This fosters crucial self-awareness and sensitivity in interpersonal connections. 

An alpha woman, thus, has excellent people skills. She is aware of how people think and can respond appropriately to various circumstances, including relationship conflicts. When an alpha female falls in love, you better believe that she will leave no stone unturned to make sure she improves the communication to make the relationship fulfilling for both of you!

11. She inspires you to be better

When you’re dating an alpha woman, she pushes you to strive for perfection since she does so in her own life as well. That explains why having an alpha girl by their side makes many people feel 10 feet tall. 

“My wife is one of the best lawyers in the state,” states a proud Anthony from Colorado. “She is the epitome of professionalism, and the care and empathy she shows toward her clients is something she practices even in our relationship. Whatever I am today is all because of her unending support in our relationship, and in me. Dating an alpha woman is the best thing I did for myself.”

12. She demands equal treatment 

A study conducted by the Pew Research Center found that in 2020, women earned 84% of what men earned. Sadly, successful and ambitious women continue to get a treatment that is significantly different from that of their male counterparts. For expressing their thoughts and wishes, alpha women are called aggressive or bitchy, while men are deemed assertive and assured.

If you’re dating an alpha female, be careful not to let her gender skew the way you regard her. Do alpha women stay single because of how they are generally perceived? No, but remember that an alpha woman would rather stay single than be in a relationship where she is not valued.

Related Reading: Power Dynamics In Relationships – How To Keep It Healthy

13. She is fiercely loyal

One of the alpha female traits in relationships is her limitless loyalty. She expects her close ones to reciprocate her loyalty as well. If someone is well-intended, she will go to tremendous measures to encourage and watch out for them.

You can be confident that an alpha woman will value your affection and commitment if you have earned it. If you respect an alpha woman in a relationship, she will look out for you and be by your side if you need her. She treats everyone around her with respect and civility, even though she is not a person who readily trusts others.

14. She has a growth mentality 

When an alpha female is involved, your relationship is much less likely to stagnate. For her, self-development is of utmost importance. An alpha woman makes for a fascinating romantic companion since she constantly has something fresh to offer.

Her curiosity ensures that you will never be struck by boredom in the relationship. She loves to learn and constantly works to improve herself. Although she is happy with who she is, she also understands that growth, rather than stasis, brings happiness.

15. She has a work-life balance

“Samantha has the best time-management skills I have ever seen,” says her girlfriend Alison. “She has this unique ability to keep her personal and professional life separate. When she is at home, she is the most amazing, lovable human being who always puts me first. And in the office, she is ruthless. A true alpha woman. While sometimes it does get a little strained, her ability to maintain a work-life balance makes me love her even more.”

Being a couple that achieves work-life balance is not an easy task. According to this study, female employees and employers, especially with the growing technology and increased workload, find it difficult to maintain a balance between their professional and personal lives. While dating an alpha woman might be a little challenging, a true alpha female will never leave any doubt in your mind about your status in her life.

16. She is highly ambitious in all spheres of her life

What is it like dating an alpha female? One of the most important things to keep in mind is her ambition. She wants to find love, get married, and start a family along with her career. She desires to leave a lasting impression on her children and grandkids. This entails having both personal and professional success. Despite the misconception that ambitious women are not family-oriented, research indicates that they have close bonds with their parents, particularly their moms.

Alpha women are not good at slowing down. She may appear worn out from her job and life in general, but that’s just how she prefers to operate. She prefers to push through,  feeding her ambition, even if it means being busy all day and spending less time unwinding.

Related Reading: What Is A Female-Led Relationship And How It Works

17. She knows how to get things done

An alpha woman is resilient and does not give up easily. Naturally, her strong will can make her occasionally demanding or determined to get her own way in a relationship. Whether they want it or not, mentorship and leadership roles are frequently thrust upon them. People look to them for advice.  

Emily He, corporate vice president of business applications marketing at Microsoft, said in a report, “In contrast to men, who tend to be career-centric and want to maximize their financial return from work, women view work more holistically, as a component of their overall life plan. Therefore, they’re more likely to approach their careers in a self-reflective way and value factors such as meaning, purpose, connection with co-workers, and work-life integration.”

Key Pointers

  • Alpha women are inherently powerful women who are passionate, loyal, determined, ambitious, resourceful, and demand equal treatment
  • Alpha women inspire you to be better and they tend to adapt to situations to make the best of them
  • Strong, independent women tend to leave a lasting impression of their personal and professional successes and want a focused outlook in their relationships

So, what do you think after reading all these signs? Are you dating an alpha woman? If you are, taking small efforts in the relationship to embrace her alpha-ness instead of suppressing it will endear you even more to her. And if she chose you as her partner, that’s one of the best compliments she can pay you.

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