I know you are super excited because you are head-over-heels in love with your lady and you are eagerly looking forward to a future together. But you are super nervous too because of her father. Let’s face it. She loves her Dad, to the moon and back. According to her, he can solve any mystery of the universe, however to you winning him over is the greatest mystery that you have not been able to solve. He seems like a hard nut to crack. She says he is a softie but she also says, “My father disapproves my boyfriend.” You are nervous, he won’t approve of you and it’s causing you heartburns.
Signs Her Father Will Never Approve Of You
Your fear is unfounded or not can be checked out quickly. All fathers of the prospective bride are rather hard to impress. They usually disapprove their girl’s choice. Just check out the film Father Of The Bride and you will know what we are talking about. You have to keep making the effort to win the to-be dad-in-law over but you have to know if your winning tactics would work at all. Sometimes the signs are already there that her father will never approve of you. In that case, you could go ahead with the marriage without his approval. And if she is not willing to do that you might have to move on. Are you stumbling into these signs again and again? Read on…
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1. Differences! Differences!
He always nitpicks the littlest of differences between him and you, her and you (and maybe even about you and other species of the planet ). Of course, he is a 60-year-old man and you are a 30-year-old young man.
No point in pointing out the obvious. But he will not rest until he makes it clear how different you are and not necessarily in a good way.
2. No space for selfies
You are the official selfie photographer of every family gathering. You are actually the official photographer. Period. “Arreh woh hein na kheech lenga photo.” But the sad part is you are always cropped out from the group photos! The reason? “Arreh space kam padh gaya tha na, Baba! ” Also, he makes you click all the photos but when posting it he will never give you credits. Childish, I know.
3. Reminiscing the past too often
Another classic sign that he does not approve of you is if he brings up the past too often (read: her past). How her ex-boyfriend would always bring them home-baked cookies whenever he visited, how once her ex-boyfriend bought him a watch that he still treasures or how much a certain ex could debate with him for hours without losing it. The list is endless.
4. I love my daughter too much!
Hello uncle, no need to say such obvious things. But he will! He will never miss a chance in front of you to broadcast how much he loves his daughter. He just wants to make a point that you can never love her enough like him. Competitive? Unfortunately, he is when it comes to competing for her love with you.
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5. There’s no common ground
Both him and you share no common interests. While he loves golf, you love working out. He loves spicy food, you have a sweet tooth. The differences are endless. And he disapproves of all your interests and tries to make it clear that what he does is only worth it.
6. He does not approve of your background
It does not matter if you come from a wealthy or humble background, he finds you lacking. And he will find you lacking always. If you have wealth he will call you a “rich spoilt kid” and if you have a modest income and modest home “you can’t keep my daughter like a Queen.” There you go it’s always Catch 22.
7. You are not compatible
He feels you are not compatible with his daughter. To him, all the odds are against you in the world. His daughter has looks, grace, upbringing, sobriety, what have you got? Umm…don’t even start giving your views it would fall on deaf ears.
8. He plays Dr Jekyl and Mr Hyde
Have you seen how he typically assumes the Jekyl and Hyde characters! In front of his daughter, he becomes A marshmallow. The moment her back turns, he becomes the hardest cookie to you. And you thought moms-in-law are the diabolic ones.
9. Hates it when others appreciate you
He hates you. But he hates it more when somebody else loves you in the family. And the hatred shows on his face. If a good word about you is uttered anywhere in his vicinity he quickly changes the direction of the conversation and ensures you don’t figure anywhere. Got the drift? He will never approve of you. Be sure of that.
10. Who are you?
And lastly, he never remembers your name or he pretends not to. It’s always Banta, Santa, Rungta! And God forbid if you ever become the slightest angry with it, he will blame it on his age. How at this age his memory has waned and you should be sympathetic towards it. I know you think, if there ever was a Drama King it would have been him. (Maybe you are right too.)
Do these signs look familiar? Well, if yes, take a chill pill, Mister. Every illness has a medicine! (Err…well at least most do.) And here your strongest medicine is ‘She’. Remember she loves you and chose you. And in time HE, who shall not be named, will realise you are her real happiness.