‘Give and take’ is part and parcel of any relationship. Until you learn to adjust and make your relationship work, you cannot expect your relationship to prosper. However, this should not mean that you give up your own well-being and happiness just to make your partner feel satisfied and happy with the relationship.
How much to compromise in a relationship?
In order to make your better half feel cherished and loved, some sort of accommodation in the relationship is necessary. Voluntarily and willingly if you compromise on certain things then it will obviously make you feel good and help make your relationship successful. However, you are a human being and not a saint. If you are not appreciated for the adjustments you make in your life just to be with your partner, then getting frustrated at some point of time is understandable.
Coexisting with each other in a harmonious state should be the goal of your relationship. You both should complement and complete each other. For this, you both have to learn to make compromises. Small compromises to allow your relationship to function smoothly are appreciable and required from time to time. It is when you start adjusting and giving up your core beliefs, desires, wants, ideas and needs which define you as a person that the strong foundation of your relationship starts to crumble.
Remember that you have to know when it is right to compromise and when it is right to take your own stand in a relationship. You do not have to lose yourself completely in the process of accommodating the whims and fancies of your partner. Being true to yourself will allow you to guide yourself properly in the relationship.
12 things you should never compromise with in a relationship
The defining quality of a prosperous relationship is compromise. But drawing the lines is extremely necessary, because compromise in the context of a relationship does not mean giving up being the person you are. It basically means developing a relationship based on appreciation, suitable adjustments, kindness, respect, and trust. Compromise has to be balanced and fair in a relationship.
No doubt that the success of your relationship depends on compromise. Getting along with your partner requires believing in your partner and yourself. You love each other, because of which working according to the wishes of your loved one is the right thing to do. But this should be the case only to an extent where it does not destroy your peace of mind.
So keeping all that in mind, here are 12 things you should never compromise in a relationship.
1. Your individuality should never be compromised
Simply put, individuality means your personal nature, characteristics, needs and qualities which distinguish you from the other people in your life. If your partner expects you to give up on your individuality and you notice yourself turning into a complete different person, then it is high time you re-evaluate your relationship.
2. The bond with your family
It is highly possible that the wavelength of your partner and your family members does not match. Most of the time, you might be in a dilemma about how to make sure that your family and your partner see eye to eye. All this is okay. But if your partner fails to respect the bond you share with your family, then it should be a matter of concern.
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3. Your professional life
All your life, you have been working towards flourishing in your professional life. However, if you find your significant other creating obstacles for you instead of encouraging you to do better, then there is no point in continuing such a relationship. An understanding partner will celebrate your professional success and help you do more in life.
4. The friends you have and the time you spend with them
Arbitrarily if your better half wants you to give up hanging out with your friends, then ensure that you do not yield to his/her pressure. It is normal if your partner dislikes some of your friends for no valid reason whatsoever, but then it is his/her issue. You do not have to stop seeing your friends, especially if they have been there for you always. What you have to do is balance your friendship and love life correctly.
5. The way you perceive yourself
A relationship should give you the opportunity to explore yourself completely and grow into a better person. It should make you feel positive about yourself. But if you find yourself breaking down in a relationship and feeling pessimistic all the time, then the relationship is not working out for you.
6. Your dignity as a person should be held high
It is taken for granted that your partner will protect your dignity like his/her own dignity and will ensure you are never mistreated in any way. However, if your partner is not able to respect you and preserve your dignity, then being in such a relationship is going to be tough for you.
7. Your hobbies and interests should never be looked down upon
While being in a relationship, you should get a chance to indulge in the activities and hobbies which interest you. If you continuously feel that you do not have the time or your partner does not like a particular thing that you do, then it means you are not truly happy. You are compromising way more than you should.
8. Your suggestions and opinions should be valued
You do not always have to put forth your opinions and suggestions when you are in a relationship. You have to know when your opinions are appreciated. Trusting your partner’s opinion is fine. But then depending on his/her decision-making ability alone will not be good for your relationship. You both need to share your opinions and suggestions with one another and incorporate these in the ultimate decisions you both make as a couple.
9. Your independence matters
Too much dependence on anyone can make you feel worthless and hopeless at some point of time or the other. Therefore ensure that you enjoy your own independence, especially in financial matters. But also be ready to help each other in times of need.
10. Never compromise on your privacy
Setting up acceptable boundaries in your relationship is absolutely essential so that your privacy does not get hampered. Your partner should trust you in such a way that he/she does not have to keep tabs on you at all times. He/she must know when you need your personal space and not disturb you at that time.
11. Your goals in life
Since you are a completely different person than your partner, your goals and his/her goals will differ. Your relationship should be such that it can help you achieve your goals in life. If your relationship fails to become your support system in life, then what is the use of such a relationship?
12. Any kind of abuse in the relationship is a huge NO
Whether it is physical abuse or emotional abuse, you should never compromise with it, even if you love the person with all of your heart. The relationship and the love you share with each other are supposed to bring peace, joy, and happiness in your life, not undue pain and hardship.
If you are stuck in a relationship which is making you compromise on any of these things then take a step back and ask yourself honestly: Is the relationship truly worth it? Are you really satisfied with your growth in the relationship? Do you really wish to continue with such compromises?
We hope the honest answers to these questions can help sort out your dilemma and get you out of such a hollow relationship.