Learning how to get over a crush is not an easy path to tread. With some hurdles and some setbacks along the way, this journey will keep you busy and staggering. However, in most cases, it is just the right track for you.
Crushes are not the same thing as love. Love is a more strong and is a consistent emotion. Crushes come and go, and are a lot less serious too. But as long as they last, crushes keep you fixated on the other person. You stay hooked and infatuated to their personality, features and unique traits.
You might wake up fantasizing about their washboard abs and go to bed reminiscing about the gorgeous shirt they wore in their Instagram post last week.
Despite their frivolous nature, crushes can dominate your mind space excessively. When that’s the case, to get over a crush can also become challenging.
18 Practical Tips To Get Over A Crush
Since crushes also in a way mean a one-sided attraction, it is best to let go of them. They can be exciting earlier on but without any actual romantic developments, they can quickly turn into a mental menace.
To get over a crush who used you or forget your crush who rejected you will take some strong will and healthy practices from your side. Don’t worry, we have you covered with these 18 tips to help you get over a crush:
1. Remind yourself that this is not love
Simply because crushes are so addictive, they can make you feel like your lives revolve around them. However, that is not true and you know it too. Love is passionate and crushes are a form of attraction that keeps you distracted from other things.
No matter how ideal they might be as people, you know you don’t love them. To break from it, especially to get over a crush you see every day, talk to yourself and keep your sensibilities in check. Most importantly get over a crush who has a girlfriend.
This one-sided attraction is just the result of a heady mix of excitement and hormones – both which are in your control if you try hard enough.
What you should keep in mind: If they cared they would have reciprocated but if they haven’t there’s no love involved.
2. Just be logical
Visualise yourself packing all your emotions in a suitcase and throwing that baggage of out the window! Let’s be brutally honest, we often form crushes so easily because we do not even know enough about them.
Their perfect aura wraps itself around our heads, keeping us so hooked that we are unable to pay attention to any dubious details. I’m not saying look into their negative traits. That’s a solid waste of time too. But if you think about it smartly, you’ll realise that there is no point flattering someone you barely know.
You might not have realised that but it’s best to get over a crush who used you, or maybe get over a crush who doesn’t even care for you.
What you should keep in mind: Watch them for some time and once you know them with warts and all use your logic to get over the crush.
3. Date other people
It is much easier to get over a crush who doesn’t care when you start having a crush on somebody else who does. Why worry about someone who won’t glance at you at a party and avoid the one who is bringing you drinks?
There is plenty of fish in the sea. Be open to exploring your options and accept the attention you truly deserve. Maybe it’s best to get over a guy who led you on and then did not respond.
What you should keep in mind: If there is someone else interested in you don’t ignore them.
Related Reading: Have A Crush When Married – 7 Ways To Handle This Situation
4. Use the No Contact Rule to get over a crush
If your curious case of crushes is getting completely out of hand, it might be time to rein things in a little and be harsh on yourself. If you find yourself often drawn to texting them, asking them out and indulging them, you need to correct course immediately.
We know getting over a crush you slept with is not easy. To get over a crush who doesn’t like you back, follow the No Contact Rule.
This means severing all contact and communication with your crush until your feelings die down. Just embrace it as a way of life.
Soon you will realize that the ‘out of sight, out of mind’ adage truly works.
What you should keep in mind: Not interacting with them could mean that it’s just an infatuation and you will even see maybe you don’t miss them.
5. Ramble to your closed ones
Sometimes to get over a guy who led you on, you just need a venting ground to release all your frustration. Most times, our frustration of not attaining our crushes keeps us hanging on to them more than our actual feelings toward them.
Meet up with a friend or barge into your mom’s house – whatever seems best to you. Talk out your feelings with complete honesty. Express how you’ve felt neglected, unworthy and ignored.
Once you get all that out, you will certainly have a much clearer mind. You can then work on making a fresh start.
What you should keep in mind: Talking your heart out helps immensely.
6. What’s my worth?
Shift your gaze from your constant idolatry of another person and spend more time thinking about yourself. We often forget to worry about ourselves when we are pre-occupied with somebody else’s thoughts.
To get over a crush who doesn’t like you, remind yourself of all the reasons that you like yourself. It might not be easy because of how let down you might be feeling. But it’ll help you feel better tremendously.
How to get over a crush is sometimes not about your crush at all. It can just be about you. In that case getting over a crush who rejected you is a lot easier.
What you should keep in mind: Keep your self-worth in mind before you keep pursuing someone.
7. Listen to happy music to get over a crush
Sad songs are for crushing heartbreaks. Crushes are not heartbreaks but are rather a consequence of letting your mind wander off too far. If you’re corny like me, you can make a getting over a crush songs playlist.
Or just put on some rap to keep yourself pumped. Listen to some rock n roll, classic oldies or jam out to your favourite artist by pretending to be them in front of your mirror.
Some quality feel-good music can lead to some quality thinking. This, in turn, can help you get over a crush who used you.
What you should keep in mind: Music has healing powers. Discover it.
Related Reading: I Realised In My Adulthood Why They Call It Puppy Love…
Crazy, right? That some regular exercising can help you get over this one-sided love fantasy? When we don’t exercise enough, we often feel groggy and dull. Sometimes, to get over a guy who led you on can be as easy as releasing those endorphins.
Get into a workout routine, get into shape, and get out of your head. Exercise does not have to be intensive or highly skillful. Just do something to get your heart racing so that your mind can be free.
What you should keep in mind: A workout will pep up your happy hormones, and make you energetic and enthusiastic. You wouldn’t mull over someone who didn’t even care for you.
9. Think of this as a learning experience
When we think of something with a learning outcome, we start to lean towards a positive interpretation of the situation. To learn constantly is to grow. If you have been treated unfairly are feeling let down and used, consider it a lesson for your betterment. Such an experience will teach you to not let your guard down easily in the future.
To get over a guy who led you on or get over a crush who has a girlfriend, do not ruminate over the injustice to yourself. Don’t start saying things like, ‘Why does this always happen to me?’ Take it in your stride, and use the learning to become a better version of yourself.
What you should keep in mind: Life lessons make you grow as a person.
10. Do your own thing to get over a crush
Focusing on yourself and spending all your time doing your own thing can be surprisingly therapeutic. This is not just one of the ways to get over a crush but to get over any setback.
Indulging in some self-care unabashedly can truly make your days much better. Whether it is some online shopping or repainting the boring wall in your room – there is so much that you can probably do!
Even if working more is your thing, just do that. Crying over a work project is so much better than crying over a crush. At least the former yields productive results.
What you should keep in mind: Motivate yourself to do things that would have positive results.
11. Don’t be bitter
A lot of times, when our crushes are egotistical and selfish people, they might take advantage of our lovelorn state of mind. They might even ask you out just to indulge in some self-praise and feel good about themselves.
When one feels cheated and used, it can be really difficult to get over a crush you slept with or went out with. In such a situation, the only way you will get over that person is if you try not to be bitter.
Being vindictive is not going to solve any problems or make your pain go away. It might take longer than usual to forget them, but harboring negative feelings is not on your list.
What you should keep in mind: It’s just no point being bitter about someone with whom you didn’t even have a relationship with.
Related Reading: Here’s what happens when my crush and I share the same gym
12. Get them out of your social media feeds
Social media tends to imprint the things we view while scrolling into the database of our minds. By constantly looking at their pictures, you will keep being drawn to them! Block, delete or unfollow – do whatever you have to.
This is especially important if you have been struggling with ‘how do I stop crying over my crush’. Even more so, if it’s a crush you see every day online.
It’s best to just erode that possibility at all and detoxify your scrolling feed.
What you should keep in mind: This way you minimise your own tendency to see what they are doing.
13. Change your mindset about wanting a relationship
A lot of times, we hop from one crush to the other because of the faults in our thought process. We want relationships and love so much that the moment we see someone even remotely worthy of our time, we invest our energies into that person.
Wanting a relationship is okay. Wanting love is beautiful. There is no need to be ashamed of it. But do not let it become desperation that causes you to run amok. Our desires should not be so intense that we settle for less. Stay strong and wait for the right person to come along.
What you should keep in mind: Everyone has a right person waiting for them in the wings.
14. Stop worrying
Stressing about a person that you don’t even admire as much as you think is a terrible waste of energy. Sadly, we very easily fall into this worry trap. It’s insane how someone who does not mean that much to us can cause us so much anxiety.
It is important to consciously weed out these unwanted feelings. Instead of lying in bed with a heavy heart, remind yourself how unimportant this is and how important you are.
What you should keep in mind: It’s just not worth worrying.
15. Don’t do things to grab their attention
One of the regressive ways our mournful hearts get over crushes is by trying to get their attention even more. We do this not to bask in that delayed attention but to make them crave us just when we have stopped craving them.
That sense of superiority stems from unresolved feelings and will negatively hamper your growth. Do not parade around trying to be an unattainable diva to make them want you. No need to mess with their head, and in the process, messing with your own too.
What you should keep in mind: Don’t end up doing dumb and silly things because a crush ignored you.
Related Reading: When I found my teenage crush on social media
16. Do not incite jealousy
Making an old crush jealous by flashing a new one is not going to make them want you more. Counterproductively, it will only make you fall deeper into the rabbit hole by constantly thinking about what they think.
Remember, it doesn’t matter what they think or what they do. Moreover, there is no point in trying to influence any of that. If you are trying to get over a crush who doesn’t care, then thinking of them constantly or trying to make them jealous are futile endeavours.
Resist those tendencies completely if you want to get over a crush who doesn’t care.
What you should keep in mind: You can’t make a person jealous who has no feelings for you.
17. Say goodbye to the scenarios in your mind
Having a huge crush can lead to some major daydreaming tendencies. You may start imagining a future with them. Or picturing cute scenarios where your affection is reciprocated and they are head over heels in love with you.
Stop right there. Because none of that is true or good for you. An occasional cute dream to satisfy your heart is understandable and okay. Them running around the kitchen chasing you is sweet to think about once in a while.
You’re only human, after all. But a strain of everyday obsession is bad for you. You must put an end to it immediately.
What you should keep in mind: Come back to reality!
18. Stay away from the cheesy romcoms
When you’re trying to get over a crush fast and efficiently, watching Love, Actually or My Best Friend’s Wedding will not make your life any easier. Keep the romance in your life on a down low. It’s a small change really but can go a very long way.
Watching romances bubble around you will only make you yearn for it more and fall for far worse crushes.
What you should keep in mind: These can make you cry, so stay away.
You might think now that getting over a crush is not too difficult. Hopefully, by now you are already re-evaluating how you actually feel about that someone. You might realize that even if the feelings are still there, you will be just fine! They’re just another attractive person and there will be a new one, don’t you worry.
Yes, despite their frivolous nature, crushes can dominate your mind space excessively.
No, a crush is the feeling of being attracted to someone whereas love is a deeper, more consistent emotion.
If you dwell on your feelings for too long and the other person doesn’t reciprocate, it can be heartbreaking.
Unless you act on your feelings and the other person also feels the same way about you, crushes are almost always one-sided.
Yes, if you’re continuously obsessing over the other person and engaging in unhealthy behavior to grab their attention.