Relationships 101

8 Things you need to know about swinging in India

Cheating with consent is not new to India, but has been unveiled recently.
Indian couples are going for swinging

Cheating has been given the new dimension of being acceptable if it is with consent. The culture of swapping wives for pleasure has taken the country, much against it’s belief of marriage being sacred and physical intimacy to take place between married couples only. No matter what your beliefs on the subject, wife swapping has been prevalent in the conventional country of India, and much to one’s surprise, it is even gaining popularity. And no, it is not just the game of rich and elite – people from all walks of life are participating in wife swapping – between known couples and unknown willing strangers.

Is swinging spicing up love and passion between couples, married or otherwise? Well, the answer is a big yes. Swinging is that little dirty secret that is coming out of the closet in India with couples exploring options to spice up their sex life. And the real reason for swinging has been beautifully summed up here. In Europe, swingers are ushering a sexual revolution and couples are looking for exciting avenues to derive heightened sexual pleasures, while in the ‘Land of the Kamasutra’, the ‘new’ trend is being accepted with open arms, practised openly.

What is ‘wife swapping’?

Wife swapping, or swinging, is the exchange of wives between two couples, consensually, to engage in sexual pleasures. Some people like to swap between known couples, while some prefer swinging with complete strangers.

The later is the more preferred way, since the former is believed to burden the parties involved with feelings like guilt. Though the concept of exchanging wives for sexual pleasures was unfathomable till a few years ago, the Indian community is warming up to the idea. Swinging, as it is commonly referred to, appeals to couples who try to break away from a monotonous married life and are looking outside the marriage for fulfilling their sexual desires and fantasies without any guilt trips. Both partners in the matrimony are expected to know about what is happening, and accept each other as if nothing as happened.

The concept of cheating with consent is not new, and now it is not limited to the royal or elite class. People from all walks of life are indulging in this culture of exchanging wives.

How common is it to swap wives in India?

wife swapping culture in india
Image: Feministaa.com

Thanks to the Internet and smartphones, what was first talked about in hushed tones now find its way via evocative texts, pictures and lot more. A few decades ago, wife swapping was like a secret underground trend. Not anymore. Swinging is a trend of cheating but with consent. Indian couples are warming up to this idea of enjoying sexual escapades guilt-free. In India, though hushed, wife swapping is a common affair. And if you thought the swinging culture is only a high-end metro city affair, you are wrong. Wife swapping has its roots in small towns, within the low socio-economic groups too.

Sex is a sin no more

The new-age couple is all pepped up, open, liberal and most importantly globetrotters. For them, having sex with just one partner sounds like a no-fun proposal. The new matrimonial bliss formula these days is to build open relationships, allowing complete freedom and transparency. Wife swapping earlier meant inviting ‘raised eyebrow’ but now it’s a considered to be a sign of a modern mind-set. People willingly engage themselves in such parties that encourage sleeping with wives of other men and enjoy the experience.

Not to forget that this arrangement does not always have a happy ending – sometimes partners develop intense, intimate feelings for their swing partners and sometimes they are unable to cope with their guilt or the thought of their partner being with someone else. Obviously, it is always too late to act on such situations.

How can you meet couples who are ready for swinging?

couples in wife swapping parties
Image: Emawebsite.org

Have you got an invitation for a party in a private house, farmhouse, elite club or a mini vacation to an exotic location? If you have and are in a mood to swing, then don’t ignore such invitations. A whole new world of adventure under the sheets is waiting to be explored.
So how do you get invited to such parties? You need to get started online, as there are many websites where you can register and get started.

Here is how swinging works

  • Selected couples get invited to such parties
  • You get enrolled into a group or club with a membership fee
  • A background check is done before giving the approval
  • Special lunches for husbands are hosted to lay down the rules of the games
  • Wives have a separate gathering where they are initiated into this game
  • The party venue is disclosed two days before the event

Related reading: This is the reason why couples are getting into swinging for sex

How do wife swapping parties work?

The swinging parties are governed by some rules. You are not allowed to carry cell phones and cameras and a background check is done. This is to ensure confidentiality. A health checkup is always done to avoid the risk of HIV and STDs. Most swinging party organisers meet the husbands and wives separately to explain the rules. During the party, men either pick up the heels of the women who are there, or women pick up car keys. Accordingly, the owner of the heels is swapped with the wife of the man for a whole night of casual, sexual fun.

8 Things you need to know about swinging in India

couples opt swinging to spice up relationship
Image: Thewrap.com
  1. Wife swapping id not illegal in India: Believe it or not, wife swapping is not termed as illegal in India. Our laws do not validate it as illegal, as this act is performed with mutual consent between all parties involved
  2. Beware, swinging is addictive too: In India, talking about sex is still considered taboo. When couples finally get to live up to their desires and fantasies via swinging, they get addicted to it. All of a sudden, sexual desires repressed over the years get an outlet that offers much needed respite. But sometimes it can be addictive in nature and can take a toll on a couple’s marriage and children
  3. There are swinger clubs in metros and cities: For the uninitiated, there are swingers clubs spread across the country. The trick is to find them and connect with them. Try searching for them online to get some leads. Or reach out to someone you know who has been a part of these swinging clubs. This can be the starting point
  4. All sex and not love: Don’t look for romance with swingers. It is a pure sexual relationship where partners keep all other emotions aside. No attachment, it’s all about sex so don’t feel guilty for committing a sin. Emotional attachment can ruin your married life
  5. Swinging in India thrived before the Internet came: Yes, back then when there were no computers or the Internet, couples did swing. Some trace this trend way back to the 1970s, where couples explored swinging a few months into their marriage
  6. Married for fun: You can stay married and now walk apart due to sexual incompatibility. Swinging allows couples to stay ‘happily’ married for real. In fact, couples get a chance to revive their relationship from being dull and boring to refreshing. The boredom gives way to excitement
  7. Get tested before the game: With AIDS and HIV on the rise, swinging clubs ensure that every member undergoes a medical test to ensure that no one is infected. This is to safeguard health concerns of all the members and avoid threat of STDs and other highly communicable infections
  8. Know the fake from real: There are many fake couple profiles on swinging websites. Before you fall into the trap, cross check the credentials before extending a swinging night out. Try meeting out in person and only then go ahead

Related reading: 7 things to remember before starting the swapping lifestyle

Why do some people enjoy wife swapping?

It may sound strange that people enjoy their spouses having sex with other people outside the marriage, but it is true. The reasons why wife swapping is accepted as a lifestyle have been summed below:

  1. It gives men and women a chance to have a liberated and open sex life, where they feel that love and sex are different. Since they are clear why they are swapping partners, there are no resentments
  2. To satisfy their sexual desires outside the marriage
  3. Some men and women are turned on when they watch their significant other having sex with a third person. They feel aroused and hot with desire and satisfaction. This can be one major reason to participate in wife swapping culture
  4. Some couples believe that swinging will get the spark back in their sex lives
  5. Adult swinging gives partners a chance to cheat without feeling guilty, since both the partners are on the same page
  6. Either one partner or both the partners are polyamorous

Implications of wife swapping for fun

Swinging has taken the urban India by storm, and in a country that believes in the sanctity of the institution of marriage and swears chastity, it also comes as a surprise. However. for some this casual fun becomes an addiction and they expose themselves to many vulnerabilities – both mental and physical. These episodes can have serious implications on a couple’s marriage and affect the family, most likely the children. Sometimes, swapping results in emotional connections that involve a lot of pain and hurt. To have a successful relationship while swinging requires a great stability in the relationship and great amounts of trust.

Swinging works only if a couple is very stable in their relationship and have very liberated minds. It may not be easy for an average person to see their partner getting all aroused and climaxed by someone else, more so if he or she has not been able to do so. Couples who are instable and unsure of their relationship should not try swinging as it will likely ruin the marriage.

Sexual infidelity is no stranger to a marriage, whether you like it or you do not. While many couples have their names on every wife swapping party today, some withdraw after an episode or two.

To swing or not to swing

If having sex with one person all your life is dull or boring, and definitely not your cup of tea, then swinging is for you. It offers a venue to explore intimacy, passion and desires on a different level altogether. Instead of cheating clandestinely, swinging offers a platform to be partners in a crime that only offers sexual bliss. Some might argue this is not in our culture, but what’s the harm in having some fun?

Swinging is here to stay. Like it, hate it or love it – take it in your stride. For those who are happy with their partner, let porn be their source of excitement.

Else swing it baby, shake that booty now.

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8 Comments

  1. क्या शानदार है लाइफ ही बदल जाये, खुलकर जीने की आजादी है

  2. Really nice narration on reality..
    we have experienced it and enjoyed. we faced few hiccups as such education was not available few years back when we started….
    however indeed good article for the one who entering into new world..

    Pritesh.mrinal1982@gmail.com

  3. Hello,

    Thanks for such informative article. And it’s good to know that there are platform available discuss openly about such sensitive topics. India was and still has been a conservative country. Strict social norms, religious boundaries and rigid family values only makes it difficult for people with open minded attitude to live and express freely and fully. But, its good to see that people in India are coming out openly about their sexual choices and lifestyle preferences.

    To confess, I am Indian living abroad with my wife. I had strong feelings and inclination towards wife-sharing since long. But being born and brought up in India, I had spent many years hiding such feelings and pretend to be normal for society. But finally when I couldnt control myself, I opened it to my wife. Thankfully she understood and rather took it sportly. My wife had been with three men so far. One of them still takes my wife on regular dates. Me and wife are happy with our lifestyle choices. It only strengthen our relationships as husband wife.

    Nilesh J

    j80nilesh@rediffmail.com

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