Once a woman friend of mine asked me what is it that men don’t like when it comes to physical intimacy. My eyes widened in response because there were quite a few. I told her that many of the turn-offs for men are similar to those for women – like hygiene. But she wanted to know more since she had been trying to get the attention of a guy and wanted to do everything right. So, I decided to play the wingman and help her figure out the turn-offs for men.
Men essentially like women with a personality – someone who is benevolent and independent. They do not like the fuss or the drama, but at the same time, they will appreciate a little bit of coyness. Most men love simplicity and no-frills in a relationship. And what they like also holds the answer to what they dislike in a potential partner. Confused? Read on and you’ll see exactly what I mean.
What Are Turn Offs
Turn-offs in a relationship are behaviors that elicit negative emotions, such as sadness, jealousy, and rage. Because they are a frequent feature that alters someone’s mood whenever they are in the picture, these habits are known as turn-offs. And they can be a deal breaker in a relationship.
For instance, what turns off guys on a first date is women talking about their ex too much. This is something a woman won’t like either. Although the terms “turn-off” and “turn-on” are often used in a sexual context, they also have other meanings. When someone does something that bothers you or irritates you to the extent that you begin to view them negatively, it can be put into this category.
These Are The 13 Biggest Turn-Offs For Men
The list of turn-offs for men is exhaustive yet basic. This dos and don’ts catalog will help you navigate through the maze of things that can diminish a man’s interest in you. A piece of advice before we start the list is to be real. No man or woman likes fake people. Now, let’s dive right into 13 definitive traits that could potentially make a man steer clear of a woman who has been fawning over him.
1. Playing dumb is a big turn-off for men
A woman who on purpose lowers her intelligence to get more attention is one of the biggest turn-offs for men. Men like women who are smart and know their business. The dumbness has no allure but is a mere parlor trick that women should refrain from using. If you think your baby talk is cute, let me tell you it’s not.
Besides, I would like to ask why would a woman like to play dumb. Is it just to seduce a guy who likes you? That is clearly not the point of dating. Be it a man or a woman, they must be with a partner of their liking. Further, playing dumb to retain an emotional hold may be the biggest turn-off for guys in a relationship.
Of late, there have been plenty of stories about women fawning around men who look great. Some women are ready to do anything to be around such men – even play dumb or worse, lower their personalities. While some dumb men may like this behavior, it just might be unattractive to men who are a tad bit smart. Just be yourself, and you may just find more than what you wanted.
2. Being arrogant could steer men clear of you
Women who treat people with contempt or saddle a rude attitude on their noses are the biggest turn-offs for men. It is wise to note that arrogance is not confidence. A man will observe not just how you talk to him but also how you treat others. And, if you have been on a berating tirade, this attitude could put you in a negative light.
It is also true that men like partners they can talk to, and unwind in the most comfortable manner. There is a certain sweet pleasure in opening up. Arrogance may hinder your bond. To put it simply, arrogance is an answer to what are the biggest turn-offs for guys.
Related Reading: Top 15 Signs Of A Selfish Husband And Why Is He Like That?
3. Dishonesty is among the biggest turn-offs for guys in a relationship
Trust is the foundation of any relationship – we can all agree on this, right? The bricks of this foundation are made of honesty. A brick missing here and there could actually ruin the base – that is me saying that lies will take your love down. Dishonesty is not only a big deal, but it is also a big turn-off for guys.
When a man invests himself in a relationship, he commits to sharing everything. Lying can ruin this to an irrevocable extent. If you are caught lying while in a relationship, this could prove to be one of the negative things for guys physically. How you may ask? A person whose trust is broken is too shaken to process anything around him. Forget being physical, he may not even give you a peck or embrace you warmly.
4. Excessive self-centeredness will keep the guys away from you
Loving yourself is good. Narcissism is not. Refrain from making out with the mirror every morning. Most of the guys (because there are always exceptions) like women with minimal make-up. They like the freshness on the face more than a cakey layer of cosmetics. Also, too much makeup all the time is one of the biggest turn-offs for men in bed.
But we all know that self-centeredness is not just restricted to vanity. Men like women who are generous and can make decisions in tune with the circumstances. Thus, if a woman starts bringing too much of “me and my priorities”, or “I and myself” into conversations, it just might prove to be off-putting for the man.
Related Reading: 9 Expert Tips On How To Deal With A Narcissist Spouse
5. What are the major turn-offs for a guy? Faking it
No, I’m not talking about just sex – but yes, that is potentially one of the biggest turn-offs for guys in bed. Faking it in any aspect of life is an act that most men will find demeaning. You wouldn’t like it if a man were fake. Similarly, men are not fans of women being dishonest it bed.
Apart from faking it in bed, men detest it when a woman pretends to like something he said or did so that he will like her. The pandering is a death knell.
Some instances of faking include:
- Being interested in his work when you are bored
- Saying you love something like football when clearly you’d rather watch a movie.
- Pretending to like his friends or family but hating them when you are alone. Ask yourself, do you want a fake relationship?
- Faking it in bed- that is an instant turn-off for guys
A man who is secure will have no qualms if you do not like or appreciate everything he does or says as long as you are not rude (refer to the point: arrogance). An honest acknowledgment goes a long way as opposed to constant pandering.
6. Poor hygiene is a major turn-off for guys in bed
An embrace is supposed to be warm and smell of a person and not a bag of discarded vegetables. Bad hygiene is a big turn-off for men. Of course, it is not expected that you smell like a tulip garden all the time, but just clean. Hygiene is a way of life and not a one-time thing. If you don’t do it well, your body will show it (or scream for help by stinking).
Moreover, poor hygiene shows a lack of care for self. If you cannot take care of yourself while being single, how will you take care of yourself in a relationship? A man who truly loves you may support you in your bad times. But even then, lack of hygiene may turn out to be the deal breaker for a man.
Clean teeth, clean hair, no ghastly body hair, etc are basic hygiene requirements. You would expect the guy to smell heavenly- then you should too. Remember, a relationship is a two-way street.
Related Reading: 22 Bad Habits That Ruin A Relationship
7. Always looking at your phone? Men will leave
Men like attention – they love to be pampered, be talked to, or sometimes just be considered. But if the woman they like is glued to the phone always and forever, it could prove to be a big turn-off for guys. Posting on Instagram instead of living a relationship, in reality, seldom works and many women fail to realize this.
A woman’s mobile phone addiction can not only be irritating for guys in a relationship but it may also wreck the bond for good. For all you know, the man may get bored and start looking out because his needs go unfulfilled. So give that social media some rest and cuddle with your man.
8. Indecisiveness is not appreciated by men
This is one of the most common turn-offs for men. Too much of eenie-meanie-miney-moe is not something all men fall for. Indecisiveness is not a quality to be admired and is definitely not cute; so if you are doing it to get attention, cut it out. It can get a tad bit annoying and can be linked to playing dumb.
Men like someone who knows what they are doing, who can take charge and take care of themselves. Constantly sitting with their partner and holding their hand while they make a decision may not always be pleasant. Also, decision-making is a life skill one must possess. It can make you independent and self-assured. So, do not be a nervous mess, take charge and you will be fine.
9. Trying to get him to act jealous won’t work well
A little jealousy is actually nice. It may get a man to do more for a woman – a healthy dose of envy may solidify commitment. But if you are constantly glued to others and give your man the side-eye to check if he is noticing, it is doing more harm than good.
Jealousy is already murky territory. Overdoing will lead to permanent debris of feelings. Pretending to talk to other guys to make him jealous can actually be risky for your relationship. No man likes his woman to be extra comfortable with any other man. So if you are constantly trying to do it for attention, cut the act and tell your man that you love him before it delves into the territory of the biggest turn-offs for men.
Related Reading: 15 Smart Ways On How To Make A Guy Jealous
10. Playing hard to get is a big turn-off for guys
A huge turn-off for guys is when a girl plays too hard to get. Several men like their attention to be reciprocated and not get caught in a cat-and-mouse game. Such a situation will not just be a negative sign for guys but it may also ruin their interest in you permanently.
Also, there is a huge difference between being coy and playing hard to get. Coyness has modesty associated with it. Playing hard to get is too deliberate. But hey, that said, a little playfulness is allowed. Because if a guy is not going to make an effort to win you over, is he even worth it? Food for thought.
11. Narrow-mindedness will not be appreciated by guys
Being awfully judgmental is on the list of turn-offs for men. If you keep passing comments casually, constantly find faults in others or resort to name-calling, a man may slowly distance himself from you. Men like women who have an open minds and who are tolerant and accepting. It is a quality that I believe every man and woman must have as it is beneficial in the long run. Thus, be kind, do not judge and everything shall be all right.
12. Helplessness is a huge turn-off for guys
Men like women who can get their work done and most women don’t know this. Playing damsel in distress for a very long time is a turn-off for men. Moreover, if they have to constantly do your tasks and rescue you from precarious situations, they might not appreciate it all the time. The constant act of helplessness can also veer into the “playing dumb” territory.
Not just women, but no human, in general, should be helpless. They must know their basics – like getting the taxes done. Constantly shirking responsibilities can lead to unwanted problems, and may even damage the fundamentals of a relationship. Also having certain life skills and independence is of great value – it could be a turn-on for men intellectually.
13. Not complimenting them will turn them off
The only guy who will be unbothered by the lack of compliments is the one who is not interested in you. Men are vain to some extent. They dress up and make an effort to smell good. And, they want it noticed. Don’t believe them when they say that they dress up for themselves. They dress up to stand out and attract saucy glares and tingling compliments. When they do not get that, they just might switch off.
Not getting compliments from their partner could be one of the biggest turn-offs for guys in a relationship. So, do find some time and tell them how their hair looks or how the 5 o’clock shadow suits them. Let them know their grooming has not gone unnoticed.
- Being fake is a big turn-off for everyone
- Do not pretend to be dumb or act self-centered
- Lack of attention on him or too much attention on him- both can be a turn-off
- Be hygienic, both physically and mentally if you do not want to turn off a guy
- Men appreciate women who are honest and faking it is a big turn-off for them
Now that we have recounted several turn-offs for men, you can up your courting game. But beyond everything, what men (and I am sure women too) like is a kind and genuine person who smells nice (haha!). Do we not agree on that?