When you have handed everything on a silver platter to your beau, he might take you for granted. Sooner than later you will realize that you let them have the upper hand in most cases and they no longer make any effort to seduce or woo you. When your partner grows complacent in the relationship, you know it is time for you to brush up your skills on how to make him regret taking you for granted. Every romantic relationship has power play going on – but for a healthy and nurturing relationship, one needs to keep that kind of play only in the bedroom.
If you are the only one who makes an effort and gives in a relationship, it’s time to take a back seat because the other person is getting complacent and is getting used to having everything their way. Before you end up telling your bestie, “He took me for granted, so I left him!”, wake up woman, you need to make him feel guilty for ignoring you through text.
In the past, a man’s job was to be the sole breadwinner of the family while a woman was supposed to stay at home and take care of the kids. Now years later, the tables have turned – we see men being stay-at-home parents and women going out in the world and being the boss. Remember, you are no less of a leader when it comes to your relationship. Take the matter into your hands, if need be, and don’t hesitate before you walk away from someone who takes you for granted.
If He Is Taking You For Granted This Is What You Should Do…
Sometimes as a relationship progresses and one becomes (too) comfortable with their partner, they stop making an effort. Love and romance get thrown out of the window as the partners get a tad too smug in the relationship. Girl, with your love boat disappearing over the horizon, you should know what to do when he takes you for granted.
We feel you, woman. And that’s why we are here with a go-to guide for you on how to treat a husband who takes you for granted. In case you feel your man is forgetting your birthday or anniversary, or not taking you out on a date despite you repeatedly requesting, consider the following steps which might help you deal with this issue.
1. Confront him head on
Sometimes we think passive aggression will make the other person realize that they are in the wrong. But, this kind of aggression is immature. Instead, sit him down and tell him that you are disappointed and you want him to make amends if he wants to save your relationship.
Make him understand that you have had enough of his bullshit and it’s time to pull his socks up. He better get going with romantic date nights, meaningful conversations, and fun couple activities. A boring and monotonous relationship is doing no good to either of you. To get things straight – ask your man to work on the relationship wholeheartedly, lest it gets stagnant and stifling.
A couple of things you can (and you should!) try are:
- Be more assertive while expressing yourself
- Let your partner know about your expectations from the relationship
- Sit down and have a hearty conversation to communicate how you feel about the relationship
- Discuss and mutually agree on things you can do to make your relationship better
2. Don’t let go of your dignity
Chin up! Since you are not the one who is at fault here, there’s no reason for you to constantly beg and plead for his attention. Don’t be a doormat and do things his way, thinking it would make him turn over a new leaf. Stop doing things you usually did for him and which he took for granted. On being confronted, you can simply tell him the reason behind your behavior, asking him to mend his ways.
This might be counterintuitive and things might still be the same i.e. he would continue taking you for granted and be indifferent to your needs. He behaves as if he has checked out of the marriage emotionally. If he continues with the same old patterns, you know it is always a good idea to walk away from someone who takes you for granted. End your toxic relationship with dignity, before mutual respect and understanding make their way out.
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3. Go no contact
If your begging and pleading have fallen to deaf ears, then it’s time to go no contact. Start by getting another place or request him to take accommodation elsewhere. It is payback time– when he takes you for granted ignore him. Few of the moves that you can start with:
- Don’t make yourself too readily available for him
- Hold your horses before you answer his calls
- Take a day or two before replying to his texts
- Play hard to get
- Ditch that itch to share everything with him
- Cut down on the time spent with him
- Make him worry that he might lose you
Chances are that he will pick up the hints and get a taste of his own medicine. Put your foot down firmly to make him feel guilty for ignoring you. When he sees you are adamant and not willing to give in, then absence may make the heart grow fonder and one day you will see him at your doorstep with flowers and an apology note. And you will know you have learned how to make him regret taking you for granted.
Related Reading: 13 Ways To Make Him Realize Your Worth
4. Concentrate on your work and hobbies
This one is especially for women whose partners have lost their jobs due to the pandemic. If he sees you not paying attention to him, day in and day out, and prioritizing your work and hobbies instead – then his ego might get hurt and he might start questioning you.
Making yourself available for him 24*7 might be the cause of the increasing complacency in the relationship. It is natural for anyone to overlook and berate something that is voluntarily served to them on a platter. What is that adage? The grass is always greener on the other side. Being divested of your focus and attention, he will realize your significance in his life. That’s your chance to show him how much hurt and disappointed you have been due to his neglectful ways.
- Be the reason for your own happiness
- Indulge in your hobbies
- Take yourself out on dates and pamper yourself
- Go on solo travels
- Have your me-time
- Up your skills and enroll in that language class, you always wanted to
- Put your work, happiness, and sanity above everything else
You know how to make him regret taking you for granted? By stripping him of all the importance you laid on him and redirecting it on yourself. Your man is sure to lose his marbles by this sudden jolt that threatens him with dethroning.
Related Reading: 25 Most Common Relationship Problems
5. Avoid having sex with him
Most men love sex. So, you start giving excuses to him every time he initiates sex, and sooner than later he is bound to go bonkers. If he is a child-man he would fight with you; if he is the mature kind, he would want to have a conversation with you. Either way, it is going to make him feel guilty for ignoring you.
- Be firm in your approach. Don’t give in to his cutesy, “Boo, I want you!”
- He might try to win you over with gestures that you know are one-off things. Avoid falling into the traps.
- Steer clear of all his advances and turn him off instead
- Learn to say ‘No’
If you are not considering to break up with him to teach him a lesson, make him understand that you have your say in the relationship. Utilize his advances as an opportunity to tell him that you are no longer interested in having sex with him because you feel like you are taken for granted.
6. Have an affair!
This one is a bit controversial and might not be popular among many of you. However, if you are the vindictive type and have had enough of your partner mistreating you, maybe it’s time to show him what he has been missing. Show him that you are no less without him.
How to treat a husband who takes you for granted? Walk out on him! One of our readers, Julia, a 35-year-old teacher, shares her experience, “Rob was retracting from our relationship in a way that was too unsettling. He started taking me for granted, thinking I have nowhere to go! There was no appreciation, no love, and absolutely no effort in our relationship. I told myself– ‘I have to break up with him to teach him a lesson.’ He took me for granted so I left him, and for the better!”
This one is for the daredevils–
- Get on those dating apps, which could be alternatives to Tinder, swipe right over the man you think can make up for your partner’s wrongdoings, and go to town on him.
- Be coquettish and flirtatious in front of him
- Make him jealous by hanging out with your male friends more often (with him in the know obviously)
Perhaps then your partner would realize his mistake and once again try to woo and seduce you. But let’s keep this as a last resort. Because once you go this way you might be creating more complications in your relationship.
If you want to salvage your relationship with your beau and ensure he does not take you for granted then perhaps it’s better to pretend to have an affair, than to have a real one.
How To Teach Him A Lesson When He Takes You For Granted
You must have heard ‘when the going gets tough, the tough gets going’. So when your relationship throws lemons at you, make lemonade out of it. Teach your partner a lesson in relationship, and let him know the queen that you are – to be loved, appreciated, and venerated. How to make him regret taking you for granted? Simply follow these:
- Avoid being a clingy girlfriend
- Devote time to yourself
- Become a social butterfly
- Show him you are doing good without him
- When he takes you for granted ignore him
- Make him feel guilty for ignoring you through text
- Break up with him to teach him a lesson
- Spend more time with your family and friends
- Stop taking efforts and making the first move
- Remove yourself physically from his life
- Lastly, (but most importantly) love yourself
- Try to get your partner to understand your expectations from the relationship. Express your dissatisfaction from his neglectful ways.
- Adopt the ‘tit for tat’ policy and start ignoring him, reciprocating the behavior meted out to you.
- Devoid him of your attention, love, and care and redirect them on yourself instead.
- Spend time with your friends and family to suggest how happy you are without him.
Being taken for granted in a relationship is common. Even though it is intimidating and frustrating, take your time before you walk away from someone who takes you for granted. Everyone deserves a second chance to improve themselves. Try to talk it out with your partner. Make him feel guilty for ignoring you through text. Express your expectations from him. Perhaps, he will be able to comprehend the wrongdoings and be motivated to work on the relationship.
The time and space that you will have apart might make your (ex) partner miss you and he would realize all that he has not been doing to keep you happy. But, for this to work you have to HAVE your willpower intact. Don’t be the first one to make him feel guilty for ignoring you through text or express interest in his well-being after being radio silent for twenty-four hours.
Focus on quality time, physical touch, and words of affirmation. If he is confused about what to do to get that spark back, guide him and tell him things that you would like him to gift you or things that would make you happy if he did them for you.
If NOTHING – silence, fights, rules, begging, pleading, and couples therapy – works then it’s time to put a full stop to the relationship. Also, if he listens to you for a few days and then goes back to being the old him, and if this keeps on recurring, then woman, pack your bags and don’t come back.