I am from Ahmedabad and an MBA student. I need your guidance. I was in a relationship with a guy and everything was going good. Our relationship became a long-distance one after he moved to Lucknow. After a few months, he started ignoring me and after I asked him what was wrong he blocked me on Social Media and on his phone. Then I found out he left me for another girl.
I was devastated to know that my boyfriend left me for another girl. I did not know how to deal with my feelings then.
What Can You Do When He Leaves You For Another Woman
It is said when someone leaves you let them go. I just couldn’t. I kept calling him and texting him asking him was the girl better looking? Was he in love with her? He finally blocked me completely and I could do nothing else but cry.
I did not sleep for months. I was so traumatised that I was totally at a loss.
He left Me For Another Girl
After some time I got to know that he was in a relationship with a Muslim girl who lives in Lucknow. I was totally shattered after knowing this and I called him to know why he was doing this with me?
I always thought we were madly in love with each other and I could not fathom why he left me. I could not come to terms with the truth that he actually left me for another girl.
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He verbally abused me
He started abusing me and he called me a characterless girl and said I deserved this kind of behaviour from him.
I was so shocked I disconnected the phone. As such it was hard to accept that he left me for another woman on top of that he started abusing me over the phone. It took me days to recover from this shock.
He was back in six months
After 6 months he came back to me and said he was very guilty for what he did and asked me for forgiveness. And he said he promised this would never happen again. He was like the person I always knew loving and caring and he said I should completely forget about those 6 months. He seemed sincere in his please.
Should I get back with him?
Please guide me what should I do now? I know he left me for another girl but can I give him a second chance? Or should I end my relationship with him?
What does it mean when someone leaves you for someone else? Should you take someone back after they left you for someone else? Can you forgive someone who left you for someone else?
Please help me find clarity. I am so confused I don’t know what to do.
Dear Confused Girl,
It is indeed sad that you had to go through this kind of a pain in your love relationship when he left you for another girl. Here are a few pointers that can throw some light on the issue at hand so that you gain clarity from it and take the right decision.
Look out for the red flags
Your relationship with your boyfriend changed after he relocated. Long-distance relationships need extra efforts to sustain the interest levels.
There are a few things you should have taken into account before starting a long-distance relationship. Because you are at a distance, out of sight out of mind issues can happen.
He had an affair behind your back
As much as there is love between the couple, the absence is hard to handle. The one’s that succumb to temptation due to loneliness get into clandestine affairs.
Affairs do happen in long-distance relationships and you do get the whiff that something is amiss sooner or later. So what happened with your boyfriend is not something that does not happen to others. The physical proximity to the other girl got him carried away. When he left you for someone else clearly you were not on his mind at that time. Otherwie he would have refrained.
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The ugly confrontation with your boyfriend
There is a way of conveying things and breaking up. Clearly, your boyfriend was not only rude but negative about your presence in his life. This is not to be taken lightly. Respect is the first and foremost thing in a relationship.
A case of sour grapes for the boyfriend
When the affair with the other girl soured, he was quick to return to you with pretended forgiveness. Please keep in mind about the way he had treated you earlier.
You have asked if you can forgive someone after he is with someone else. In certain circumstances it could be possible but in your case he was extremely harsh and what is the guarantee that he would be nice with you in future.
If he left you for another woman and came back, he might repeat the same thing again.
What do you want in your life right now?
Would you like to accept a man that doesn’t value or respect you? Can you be happy with such a man? Can you bring yourself to trust him in future when you would have to be away from him due to work commitments or other responsibilities?
You are the best judge of the situation at hand and the very fact that you are in doubt indicates that you aren’t sure about letting him into your life again. You know what you have to do. Be bold and get a new life. Sometimes when someone leaves you it’s better to let them go.