33 Questions To Ask Your Significant Other To Know Them Better

questions to ask your significant other
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Have you ever found yourself circling around questions to ask your significant other to make sure you really know everything about them? Because we know the itch. When you start dating someone or falling for them, you want to know every crevice and nook of their being so you can constantly uncover and also discover the person you love so much. 

What are the things that make them get up in the morning or little details like how much sugar they like to take with their coffee and why? From the largest to the smallest little things, these are the details that make a person whole and when you are falling in love, you just want to know every single one of them. The reason we enjoy the details so much is because we eventually grow to love them.  

33 Questions To Ask Your Significant Other To Know Them Better 

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Life and your relationship is a constant process of getting to know one another. What keeps the spark alive when dating long term is that every time you see them, you get to enjoy something new about them. 

Maybe yesterday you learnt that they completely hate donut holes but enjoy regular donuts just as much. Maybe today you realized that the person you love has a complicated relationship with their mother and yet it shapes a lot of who they are. 

Even 10 years into a marriage, it is indeed possible that you will learn something new about your husband and that indeed is what keeps the sparkle alive in your love! So here are a few ‘How well do you know your partner questions’ for you to really gauge how deep you have dived into your partner’s life. 

1. If you could listen to one song for the rest of your life, what would it be? 

Pay close attention to the lyrics of the song they tell you about. Oftentimes, the music they listen to will tell you more about them than they ever will. This is an interesting way to ask what their favorite song is, to know which tune makes them happy. 

2. What would you want to change about your relationship with me? 

This is a pretty big question to ask them but nevertheless, really pertinent. One of the more serious questions to ask your significant other about your relationship; with this one, you’ll really get to see how seriously they take you. 

3. Do you think one can be friends with their exes? 

Now this is usually a tricky one and they might take some time to ponder whether they can be friends with their ex. But this is one of the more important questions to ask your significant other to really see what they think of all the people they have dated. Do they prefer to have them out of sight and mind or are they willing to form a new relationship with them? 

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4. What is your favorite childhood memory? 

This is one of the good questions to ask your significant other in the initial stages of your relationship. This will not only help you understand their past better, but also what simple pleasures made them happy. Was it playing on the beach or spending time with their father? These things can give away a lot about what one values. 

intimate questions to ask your significant other
Ask them to tell you their favorite childhood memory

5. Do you believe in monogamy and marriage? 

Oh boy, now we really are demanding some serious answers. If you want to be in a long-term relationship, you need to know your partner’s stance on the same and if it aligns with yours. This is one of the deep questions to ask your significant other before marriage so you don’t pop the question out of the blue and end up disappointed. 

6. Is there anything that you regret? 

Our regrets often mask deep and hidden parts of our past and our personalities. Our experiences are what make us who we are in the present and you might want to know the events or circumstances that made your significant other the way that they are today. 

7. Who is the most inspiring person you have ever met? 

This is a good way to really dive deep into your partner’s personality. We all have one or more role models who guide us into being our best selves. Find out who that is for your boyfriend or girlfriend to really understand their goals of who they want to be. 

connecting questions to ask your significant other
Ask them deep connecting questions about themselves

8. What was your first impression of me? 

One of the questions to ask your significant other about yourself, you have to find out how they fell for you. You might even be surprised when they tell you what they first noticed about you when you started dating in college and things they like about you that you may not even be aware of. 

9. Have you ever been cheated on? 

Opening up some massive doors here, but such intimate questions to ask your significant other go a long way in understanding them better. When one has been cheated on, they might change in a lot of ways or view relationships much more differently. 

Now you’ll understand much better the root cause of their trust issues or insecurities and hopefully help them overcome the same. 

10. Would you rather curl up with a book or go clubbing? 

For the initial stages of dating, this is one of more important questions to ask your significant other to really know how they choose to spend their time. This way you’ll know better than to constantly drag them to the club and then wonder why they never want to go. You’ll know that it’s not because they are avoiding you but simply because that is not their jam. 

Related Reading: 5 ways to enjoy a party even when your partner is not a party person

11. Would you ever want an open relationship? 

Now the answer to this might change over time, nevertheless you must ask this one. Don’t judge them if they say yes. But at least now you know if you should be expecting such a proposition from their end some day! 

12. What are the 3 most important elements of a relationship? 

These connecting questions go a long way in establishing harmony in your relationship. Have a lengthy discussion about what you both think are important qualities of a healthy relationship and further ponder how to cultivate the same. 

The growth of a relationship lies in healthy communication and mutual understanding and this question is the first step towards that. 

13. What do you love the most about me? 

This is an adorable question to ask your significant other about yourself to really see what it is, that made them stay. Is it your charm, your wit, your kindness or all of it? Ask them so you know what it is about you that makes their heart flutter. 

questions to ask your significant other about your relationship
Ask them what they like about you the most

14. Would you choose money or love? 

Now, before you get all riled up if they say they would rather have a Mercedes Benz than marry you, let this question be a more open-ended discussion about these concepts in general. 

Don’t get too personal and start relationship arguments with this one. Let this be more on the philosophical and on a simple discussion level. 

15. How can you tell when you are really comfortable around someone? 

Use this question to understand what makes your boyfriend or girlfriend feel safe around other people. Is it loud or chatty people or do they like being around more sombre personalities? At least after this one you can expect how they might react to meeting your parents or friends. 

16. What is your favorite meal? 

Now you know what to cook and surprise them with on their birthday! This quirky question will tell you how much they enjoy the little and simple things in life. It could be their mom’s salsa and chips or a hamburger they ate while driving out of the city for work. Either way, you know the way through their stomach to their heart now. 

how well do you know your partner questions
Ask them what they love to eat

17. Would you ever indulge in a threesome? 

Some people might find this odd but once you have reached a certain stage of the relationship, you should ask this question. This is indeed one of the more intimate questions to ask your significant other but it gives you a fair idea of their sexual freedoms and proclivities. So don’t be shy and ask away! 

18. Do you want children? 

One of the questions to ask your significant other before marriage, it is absolutely necessary that you try to stay on the same page about this one. If not, then your marriage will certainly be off to a rocky start. One cannot put off discussing this question when marriage or any form of a committed relationship is on the horizon for you two. 

Related Reading: Should I Have A Baby? Decide To Go Ahead With These 12 Reasons

19. If you could go to the moon, would you? 

Is your partner adventurous and exploratory or very content with the life they have? Use this simple and quirky question to get them thinking. This can open a can of worms about other things like aliens, life outside of Earth and all that jazz that you can end up talking about for hours. 

20. Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 

This might sound like a job interview question, but it’s probably one of the most important questions to ask your significant other before you start getting serious with them or enter a long-distance relationship with them. 

One should constantly discuss such deep relationship questions and revisit life goals with their partners to make sure that they eventually intersect. If your goals are too different, it might be one of the breakup signs or something that you still have a long way to work on. 

21. What do you think is my biggest weakness? 

One of the more tricky questions to ask your significant other about you, take the answer with a pinch of salt. Remember that they are only being honest with you because they love you and want the best for you. You might learn something about yourself that you probably were not aware of before and can try to work on. 

22. What is your favorite way to spend a day with me? 

Now you really know how they like to spend time with you. Do they like to do something outdoorsy like fishing or do they prefer low key and simple things to do with a girlfriend at home? Either way, your next date is already planned! 

good questions to ask your significant other
One of the relationship questios to ask is to find out what their ideal day with you is like

23. What makes you want to wake up in the morning? 

This is one of the nicer connecting questions to really bond with your partner and understand the one drive that gives them purpose. Is it their job, their family or is it just their passion towards watching the Lakers play? Whatever it is, you should get to the bottom of it. 

24. Are you happy with the amount of time we spend together? 

This is probably one of the most important questions to ask your significant other about your relationship. This can lead to a lot of follow up discussions about space in a relationship, how often one should call the other and whether one is feeling neglected or lonely in the relationship. 

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25. Are you an internal or an external person? 

Internals often believe that they have a right to control their lives on their terms and externals usually just hope for the best and leave everything to the mercy of destiny. This simple distinction greatly influences how one goes about their everyday life and makes the decisions that they do. Ask your boyfriend this question to understand what his prime faith is in. Is it himself or is it the world? 

26. Were you closer to your mom or dad? 

When you are in love with someone, it is hugely necessary to understand that person’s relationship with their parents. Our relationships with our parents widely determine how we turn out as people or how we choose to love other people. This can give you a major insight into who your partner really is and what makes them that way. 

Related Reading: 21 Christmas Gifts For Parents [2020]

27. Are you happy with the sex in this relationship? 

From time to time, one should be open about discussing the sex that they are having. It is possible that they might be feeling a certain way but are awkward to share it with you. Whether they want to try BDSM and sex toys or want to go slow and make it more passionate – pop this question to make your sex life better. 

important questions to ask your significant other
Ask them about whether they enjoy the sex or want to change something

28. Do you want to move to a different city or live here forever? 

Does your significant other have huge plans of relocating or are they happy to settle where they are? This is one of the more important questions to ask your significant other before marriage so you know what you might be signing up for. 

29. What do you wish people would notice about you more?

When you are in a serious relationship, it is good to be with someone who is self-aware and not self-obsessed or be dating a narcissist. The answer to this question will tell you exactly that. You will be able to know how your partner views themselves and what they consider promising qualities in their own personality. 

30. Do you think you are heard enough in this relationship? 

It’s so important to discuss such relationship questions, but we often overlook them. Your partner may not even know it right away but they might eventually realize that there might have been a time, place or incident when they were not heard or valued. 

Give them the space to think about that and resolve that with you before they harbor any more negative feelings about it. 

31. What was your most embarrassing moment? 

To keep things lighthearted and fun and really see that goofy side of the person you love, ask them about their biggest screw ups or when they were so embarrassed that their face went red. It will be cute to keep revisiting that story and find something to laugh about. 

32. What is the best relationship advice you have ever received? 

One often receives a lot of bad relationship advice from family and friends so once you’re done laughing about that, get down to what your partner thinks was good relationship advice. This will tell you exactly what they think of your relationship and what they think is good for the both of you. 

Related Reading: Relationship Advice For Couples Who Work Together – 5 Must-Follow Tips

33. Do you see me being a good parent one day? 

One of the questions to ask your significant other about you, this is a great one if you’re planning to have kids soon. Your partner will open up to you about what they think are good qualities for your future child and what you might actually need to work on. This can be really constructive if a baby is on the way! 

So, there you go. From personal and intimate questions to deep questions to ponder about your relationship, we have it all covered. Remember, getting to know your significant other is a process so don’t rush it and turn this into a rapid-fire round. Take your time to peel back those layers and you’ll feel like you are falling more in love, every single day. 

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