What is like in being in an abusive relationship?
Let’s face it, every relationship is an emotional affair, but being in an abusive relationship is an emotional rollercoaster ride that no one wants to buy the tickets to. But not everyone is aware of its signs during the early stages of their relationships. It can’t be stressed enough how badly being in an abusive relationship can diminish the victim’s perception of self-worth and traumatize the human psyche. However, there are ways to see the red flags before it gets too late and this is why you need to watch out for these 5 warning signs.
1. You try too hard to please your partner
You are constantly being careful about not to do or say anything that might trigger a negative response in your partner. Being in an abusive relationship simply means walking on eggshells – where you don’t know which action, direct or indirect, from your end can cause an emotional backlash or even physical abuse. Even a seemingly trivial matter can cause a fight and you are always put on the wrong side.
Related post: How does the abuser operate in an abusive relationship?
2. Your partner can express opinions, but you can’t
Abusive relationships are imbalanced in nature. If your partnership doesn’t allow you to be expressive of your thoughts and opinions, if your partner feels it’s okay for them to rant on occasions yet your negative emotions make you a subject of their criticism, if your partner dismisses your opinions in front of friends and makes you a butt of their joke – then it’s a definite sign that you must break up NOW.
3. You are a victim of Gaslighting
You might not be familiar with this term, but Gaslighting is a common form of manipulation that most of us have seen at some point in life. It’s a form of psychological abuse which aims at manipulating someone to such an extent that makes them doubt their own perception of the events and finally their sanity. It’s an undercover emotional abuse in a relationship that slowly eats your sense of judgment and you start self-loathing.
4. Your partner doesn’t trust your emotions
Complete trust for each other makes the foundation of a good relationship. But in abusive relationships often the abusive partner behaves in these particular ways because of low self-esteem. This makes them mistrust your emotions. In a case like this most emotions expressed on your part becomes an attack to them. Because of their lack of trust on the partnership, they assume any expression of displeasure from your end is designed to hurt them personally. The abuser, in this case, sets off emotional backlash or in a worse scenario and tries to physically hurt you.
Related post: Pretty big abusers
5. You feel isolated and trapped
An abusive relationship thrives on isolating the victim from the world. Your partner might try to dress up this urge to ‘have you all to them’ as romance, but this way the abuser in this scenario actually isolates you from friends and family – people who could help you or offer support. Being in an abusive relationship makes you feel trapped as the abuser turn to intimidation or emotional blackmail to not let you go out of sight.
If you think this sounds a lot like your relationship then don’t wait – talk to someone who can help. If the relationship is affecting your mental health, work or study, everyday life and close relationships then it’s not worth to hold on to. Talk to someone you trust and find a way to get out of the mess. There’s always one.