All great things start with a cup of coffee and good conversation. You know that already, don’t you? What you don’t know is how to talk to that amazingly attractive girl next door. That’s all right. Perhaps one of the hardest things guys ever had to do was to simply talk to an attractive girl. Even if you might have asked her out already, you realise that your mouth and mind start to suffer from a disconnect when you have to talk to a beautiful girl. Well.
The best of orators and the best of men fluent in talking tend to go through a brain-freeze condition when they have to talk to an attractive woman. You know you need to bring forth your A-game, but you are nervous, intimated and somewhat idiotic. Your brain and tongue do not work together and you feel like you don’t know any language. While that may be true, the fact that you feel incredibly good after talking to an attractive woman makes it all the more thrilling. You can talk to an attractive girl with ease it is not all that hard.
Even if you might have asked her out already, you realise that your mouth and mind start to suffer from a disconnect when you have to talk to a beautiful girl.
5 simple tips to talk to an attractive girl
Drop your late-night mirror rehearsals, tear down those song lyrics and press the delete button on all those movie dialogues you have mugged up. None of those is going to work out. And just so you know, women on an average take about 3 minutes to decide what they think of a man – so you have but just 180 seconds to seal the deal. (Source)
Go through these 5 tips on how to talk to an attractive girl. By the time you come to the end of this article, you’ll start feeling as if you were born to do this and now you know-how.
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1. Look into her eyes
The first important tip for any good conversation is to maintain eye contact with your partner. Making eye contact with an attractive girl sends all sorts of positive signals her way. First, you are giving her a really good first impression that you are not intimidated by her (no matter how much you are sweating within). You are confident and sure about yourself.
Second, you aren’t one of those jerks simply trying to have any sort of conversation or trying to win a bet. And while it may be hard for you to keep your eyes off her boobs, make sure you don’t come across as another idiotic man if you want to take this conversation further. Do not make your eyes wander – a girl is quick to notice these small things even if it is for a second. Just do not do it.
Third, by looking her in the eyes and holding that gaze, you are non-verbally communicating – ‘You have my attention’. And she is definitely going to return your attention. What else do you want, eh?
The stronger the eye contact, the better. In fact, studies have shown that strong eye contact has the potential to set even two strangers in love. This is the best way to start off talking to a beautiful girl.
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2. Try to connect with her
Gorgeous, beautiful girls are much like normal girls; they are humans like all of us. They are tired of people trying to impress them with their achievement medals, celebrity pals, 6-pack abs or a 6-figure paychecks. They want someone to connect with them on an intellectual, emotional level, much like most of us. But most men look at them as eye-candies and talk only about themselves to create a good impression. That is not how it works in the long term.
When you are talking to an attractive woman, make it a conversation, not a resume-reading activity. A gorgeous girl is already tired of men trying to impress her, rather than connect with her. Keep your high profile job and 6-digit salary aside, and connect with her on a personal level. Talk to her like a friend, give her your full attention and make her feel she has a friend in you.
What they are looking for is someone with whom they can talk and develop a real, personal connection. Try being that person who makes her laugh. Tell some funny childhood incident. Whatever you talk, make sure you are honest. Once you make her smile, you become an attractive one to her.
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3. Be a good listener
In the process of doing all the talking, don’t forget that you have to be a listener as well. Listening is the twin sister of talking. Speaking to a beautiful girl is fine but you have to listen too. Try not to talk all the time about you, your past, your likes and dislikes. While it is natural to talk about yourself and to let her know all that you have in life, this is not the real way to connect. Your motive is not to brag about yourself, but to make her feel special in your company. You get the hint!
Bring the focus to her. This is your golden opportunity to know everything you have ever wanted to know about this beautiful girl. Show her that she has all your attention and you are willing to listen to her. She will feel good, and the more you make her feel good, the better the chances she will like you more.
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4. Ask the right questions
When you start asking about her, make sure you don’t go all interviewer kind or too interrogative that would simply set her mood off. Try asking meaningful questions like – “What is the one thing in the world that you cannot live without?” “What is your biggest achievement to date?” “If you were given one superpower what would that be?”This will definitely keep her hooked to you.
Most guys start with the same surface questions – where do you work, where do you live, what did you study…These are pretty boring and not at all interesting. If you have to ask her, ask her that reveal her personal, private side. This may seem intimidating, but help you connect on an intimate and personal level. Plus, you get to know her much better. Worth the risk, totally.
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5. Build points of similarity
Everyone develops an instant liking for someone who shares similar interests with them. If you really want her to get interested in you, show her how much you have in common. And once you are able to do it, it will click instantly. Suddenly from a stranger, she will start to look at you as a friend.
You do not have to fake your similarity. Just do not forget to say, ‘Oh I too like this’ or ‘me too’ when some point of similarity comes up in your conversation. In this way, she will develop a sense of belonging and will feel a little more comfortable talking with you. Also, the next time you can have a whole new range of topics to talk about from these points of similarity.
5 things not to be said to girls during a conversation
While it is always a score to know all the right things that you should say to a girl, it is equally important to keep a note on what ‘not’ to say.
1. “You’re so attractive; I don’t understand how you’re still single.”
You lose all the brownie points that you have gathered in your conversation by saying this one line. Being single is a good thing. A pretty girl can be single out of choice – and if she hadn’t been, what were your chances with her? So if she is doing a fine job dealing with it, it is none of your concern in asking her how.
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2. “Can you make a quick guess on how much money I make?”
A common misconception guys have regarding women who are beautiful and independent is that they are gold diggers. They only talk to men who talk the language of money. That is not entirely true. Try winning her heart with something more substantial than your bank account.
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3. “My friends are always trying to hook up with me.”
Her immediate response would be ‘Did I ever ask you that?’ If you wish to make yourself more desirable then try being more honest with your girl. Tell her rather how you have always wished to know her in spite of having a number of girls who are friends.
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4. “You just look like my mom!”
And the next thing you know she has blocked you forever from her life thinking you to be some creepy dude with an Oedipal complex. Women don’t like to be compared to their mother. You think that every woman needs to be complimented for being an embodiment of kindness, nurturance and a never-ending saga of love. Stop thinking that right away.
5. “So… your place or mine?”
Once she starts getting comfortable and opening up to you, you feel that you have nailed it. Now that she has started laughing, smiling and sharing snippets from her life, she is sending these green signals that she likes you. And she is definitely ready for ‘it’. Well, ask her this question and you’ll never see her ever again.
Good conversation is also like a form of art. You need to practice to perfect it. And once you keep in mind the necessary tips and get mastery over them, every attractive girl would want to have that cup of coffee with you.