Relationships 101

How to attract a divorcee?

She is vulnerable, but not weak. Fill the gap in her life with love and respect.
woman seeing man with love

Getting involved with a divorced woman is not a cakewalk because she is someone who has already gone through a failed relationship. Remember, a divorcee will be highly experienced when it comes to dealing with men. She will be extremely cautious as well before getting into a new relationship. Therefore one has to approach such a woman with much thought, patience and care. Attracting a divorced woman will be tougher because she is not looking for all those cute, filmy versions of romance, but something deeper that touches her soul.

Another thing is that divorcees are viewed with a lot of prejudice, especially the women. Divorced women getting into new relationships or getting remarried is also quite rare. Moreover, they are quite scared of being manipulated, betrayed or making bad choices. Self-doubt is high in women who have been divorced. Thus this also has to be taken into consideration before approaching a divorcee.

Character traits of a divorced woman

A divorcee is emotionally detached – and has come out of a relationship that did not do well. She would not respond to temporary hook-up interests because she is nervous about the emotional implications. There are a number of character traits that a separated woman exhibits and to understand them is essential for any man who genuinely wants to start a long lasting relationship with her. Some of the traits that you will definitely notice in a divorced woman are:

  • She will be an independent person, because the divorce must have taught her to be on her own and stand up for herself
  • She might exhibit lower levels of confidence and might also have major trust issues
  • A recently divorced woman will not be superficial and will be a complete realist when it comes to any new relationship
  • Along with that, she will also act maturely and wisely if she gets into another relationship
  • Due to her past experiences which have disappointed her, she might have high expectations from the new partner

How to approach a divorcee?

Unlike approaching a single woman, approaching a divorcee requires quite a bit of consideration and confidence. It is necessary that you keep certain important points in mind while approaching a divorcee in whom you are actually interested. These are-

  1. Honesty is the best policy when it comes to dating a divorcee: Just make sure you are upfront when you approach her for the first time. She’s been through a failed relationship and she understands her social standing too. A divorced woman can distinguish between fake and genuine personalities really well
  2. Endurance is the key to a fruitful relationship with the divorced girl: Be ready to get your patience tested in different ways when you start dating a divorcee, because she will not be pleased very easily. She will test your feelings on different levels and will also act aloof and insensitive at times
  3. Try to become her friend first: A woman who has just been divorced will have a lot to share. So the wise move on your part would be to listen to her as a friend and understand her well before jumping into a romantic relationship

    couple walking together in road
    walking together : Image source
  4. Be empathetic not sympathetic towards her: The moment you pity a divorcee, you will lose her. She believes she is strong to have left her marriage for good, and she needs to see that in your eyes. Sharing her feelings and getting to know her perspectives is a fundamental step towards establishing a good bond between the two of you
  5. Do not be desperate: This will be a big turn-off. A divorced woman does not wish to mingle with someone who is simply desperate and bear the emotional drama. So present yourself as a confident and reliable person instead of a needy person

Dating a divorced woman

Once you have approached the divorced woman you like in accordance with the above points then you have to be ready to date her appropriately. Ensure that you are not just dating her because you are physically attracted to her. You must be convinced that you truly want to date her to know her better as a person and take the relationship further.

Tips that will help you date a divorced woman aptly are:

  1. Be as humorous and fun loving as possible: Since she has already been through many hardships, she will obviously want a person who makes her laugh and makes her enjoy every moment of her life. After enduring a failed relationship, she is definitely going to value some fun and laughter. The idea is to have some lighthearted fun so that she feels relaxed and comfortable around you
  2. Avoid mentioning her past sufferings: Most probably, the girl will share her side of the story with you when you first approach her. Talking about the past and asking her questions about the previous relationship is only going to bring back painful memories. Nobody appreciates being reminded of painful experiences. Talking about the future rather than dwelling on the past is going to increase your chances of attracting a woman who has been through a divorce
  3. Learn from the mistakes of her ex-husband: She must have obviously told you about the mistakes of her ex-husband. Therefore you have to take note of that and make sure that you do not repeat them. Be different from the man who was in her life earlier and do not compare him with you
  4. Give her ample time and space: This is very essential, because she should not feel pressurised and should be given an opportunity to settle her feelings and mind accordingly
  5. Take things slow: Divorced women trying to build new relationships are sceptical and apprehensive. She may take her own time to be emotionally ready for a new man. The best way of attracting a divorcee is to let them take it slow and not force intimacy
  6. Be dependable: Make her understand that you are dependable and reliable. A divorced woman will probably be afraid of another failed relationship like her last one. Displaying a stable and trustworthy personality is essential for wooing a divorcee

Advantages of being with a divorced woman

Having herself had a failed relationship, divorced women generally take time to consider any prospect with utmost patience and care. Some advantages of dating a divorcee are –

  • A divorcee will never rush into a relationship, giving you enough time to make up your mind and heart as well
  • She will be a committed woman once she starts her relationship with you, because she will not want to go through heartbreak again
  • Her invaluable experiences of the past marriage will surely allow her to live her life happily with you
  • She will be adjusting and will understand you in a way no other person can understand

Related reading: Even for a second marriage, men have the upper hand

Disadvantages of being with a divorced girl

However, she also comes with a baggage – something that may weigh on her choices and personality for many years to come.

lady thinking when hugging to the man
Thinking about past: Image source
  • If the girl has gone through a devastating divorce then she will obviously exhibit commitment and trust issues which will be hard to overcome
  • Past memories might come to haunt your present relationship with her at any point of time
  • Emotionally such a woman might be unpredictable, which might become troublesome for you

Pursuing a separated woman who has a child

This can be rather challenging and complicated, but with determination and correct intentions you can build a successful relation with such a woman. A very effective way to be with a divorced woman is to win over her children. Divorced women are often very insecure about their children not having a father. Filling that gap will immediately boost your attractiveness. Remember, to a divorcee, her child will be top priority. So meet the kid only when you think the relationship with her is stable and will last. Get to know the kid, plan outings with the kid and his/her mother.

Once a good relation is developed between you and the kid, things will become much smoother for you in terms of the relationship with the divorced girl. A divorcee appreciates a man who adores kids and knows how to deal with them.

How to make a divorced woman fall in love with you?

Falling in love is not an easy task for a woman who has been divorced. However, it does not mean that it is not possible. All you have to do is be dedicated to her and shower her with all the love and care in the world. Make her realise that you are the right one for her and that you will be there for her in her good times as well as bad times.

Show her that she is an important person in your life and it does not matter to you that she is a divorcee. Let her know that you love her despite her past and that you want to accept her completely. All this should help kick-start things between the two of you and both of you can decide on how you want to take things further.

A divorced woman has already been through a harrowing experience. She will probably not look at a potential relationship in the same way other women would. If you are trying to attract a divorcee it is essential to understand her background and be sensitive towards her needs. Hope these tips help.

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