How well do you know your partner? A million-dollar question that may not seem such a hard nut to crack when you are with the right partner and you read each other like a book. But sometimes, even an entire lifetime isn’t enough to see a person for exactly who they are. After a few years of togetherness, you may often find yourself heaving a melancholic sigh, considering yourselves to be one of those couples who have had all their ‘firsts’. No more mystery, no more stories to share!
Well, boast all you want about knowing one another in and out, but you may, surprisingly, find yourself stuck at intricate relationship questions like “What’s your partner’s fondest memory of their childhood?” or “What’s on their post-retirement bucket list?”. Enter Bonobology with a bag full of get-to-know-your-partner questions to make your strong bond even stronger.
From your partner’s dream destination to their favorite ice cream flavor, we give you the starter pack for many interesting conversations in the future. So, sit tight, grab yourselves a cup of coffee, and give these questions for couples a fair shot. Think of it as a fun love test if you may. Rest assured, it will bring in a wave of affection only to make you feel closer to each other.
Why Is It Important To Know Your Partner Well
Table of Contents
The better you know your partner, the better your chances of making the relationship work, as simple as that. It’s one of the reasons many people are dismissive of the idea of love at first sight. After all, how do you fall head over heels for a person and dream of a happily ever after without learning the first thing about them?
What if they are chain smokers and you can barely stand the smell of a cigarette? What if they aspire to become a globe trotter someday and you love your little town way too much to ever think of leaving? After a point, you will realize that not knowing is not part of the fun, but rather a source of all your conflicts.
Research shows that a good grasp of your spouse/partner’s life experiences emotions, expectations, and abilities happens to strengthen the understanding within the relationship. Plus, as you acknowledge and accept the limitations and capabilities of your partner, the relationship runs on a positive cycle.
Now that you are here, looking for meaningful questions to ask your boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse/partner, you’re off to a good start in your endeavor to deepen the intimacy in your bond. Allow us to explain why and give you five good reasons it’s essential to know your partner well for a healthy relationship:
- Being aware of your loved one’s emotional baggage and traumatic experiences lets you handle sensitive issues more delicately, without accidentally hitting a sore spot
- Knowing about their family dynamics, childhood, and educational background helps you understand the root of various aspects of their personality, their vision in life, and whether your values and morals are aligned or not
- Having a fairly good idea about your partner’s likes and interests gives you a chance to find common grounds for conversation and shared activities
- As you express curiosity and ask many random questions to one another in the process of connecting with your partner on a deeper level, it opens new channels of communication, especially in a new relationship
- When you gather information about your partner, piece by piece, and gradually recognize such beautiful people they are, you learn to appreciate them, you fall for them a bit more every day
201 how well do you know your partner questions to test your intimacy
Sounds scary? But hey, I have got your back! Here is a list of some handpicked questions to get to know someone that can help you determine whether you know your partner like the back of your hand or if there are still some facets of their personality you need to explore.
No matter what the outcome is, there is a bright side to it. If you know your partner inside out, then you can be sure you’ve reached an aspirational level of intimacy. If not, then view these interesting questions to ask your loved one as an opportunity to uncover newer sides to them.
Where do you think you stand? There is only one way to find out: trying your hand at this super fun love test we have rounded up for you. The drill is very simple. You read the questions out loud, try to answer as many of them as you can, and whenever you draw a blank, your partner can fill you in with the right information. Let’s get to it, shall we?
Questions about childhood and family
You are missing out on a big part of your beloved’s story if you turn a blind eye to their life before you came into the picture, especially their childhood and adolescence. A person’s family and childhood have a huge impact on who they are today. Check out these family questions to see how well do you know your partner, their family bonding, and childhood experiences, both good and bad.
1. What is your partner’s fondest childhood memory?
2. Where did your partner grow up? In the city or the suburbs?
3. What do they cherish most about growing up in that place?
4. Did your partner’s parents move a lot?
5. How would they describe their family home in a sentence?
6. What is your bae’s favorite nickname?
7. Mom vs dad – who do they resemble more?
8. What was their favorite subject in school?
9. Did your partner have any quirky habits as a child?
10. Were they ever into art/music/drama in their school days?
11. Do you remember any fun stories about their childhood like their first stage performance or about the time they played hooky?
12. Did they play any sports growing up?
13. What does your SO consider to be the best thing learned from a teacher that they still follow?
14. What made them happy as a child?
15. Who are your partner’s best friends? Then and now.
16. Is your girlfriend/boyfriend still in touch with their school friends?
17. Who was their first crush in school?
18. Was your partner successful at dating in high school?
19. What’s the first word that comes to their mind when they hear the word high school?
20. Was your partner a popular kid or the nerdy one in school?
21. As a child, what did your partner want to become when they grew up?
22. Have your partner ever been bullied at school?
23. Does your partner enjoy spending time with his/her family?
24. What was the worst trouble they got into as a child?
25 Did your girlfriend/boyfriend have any pets growing up?
26. How many siblings does your partner have? Do they get along?
27. Is your bae close to their father?
28. What kind of a bond do they share with their mother?
29. How does your partner feel about their parent’s parenting style?
30. Did your partner have a safe, healthy environment at home growing up?
31. Was your partner close to their grandparents? Are they still alive?
32. Which relatives in the family your partner cannot stand at all?
33. Is their family religious?
34. Is there a family trip your partner is particularly nostalgic about?
35. What’s their all-time favorite meal cooked by their mom?
36. Which was your partner’s favorite cartoon as a child?
37. What was their favorite book as a child?
38. What words of wisdom have parents passed on to them?
39. Are there any family traditions your partner looks forward to?
40. How did they spend the big holidays?
Questions about intimacy and sexual chemistry
What does your partner prefer between the sheets? Can you guess the secret sweet spot that turns them on instantly? Knowing your partner with all their kinks and fetishes reflects a great level of intimacy in the relationship. And here’s a chance to flaunt your knowledge about your bae in a hot way by taking a shot at these erotic get to know you questions. So, are you ready?
41. How does your partner define amazing sex?
42. How many people have they slept with?
43. What’s the best sex your partner has ever had?
44. Are they adventurous when it comes to sex?
45. What’s the weirdest place your girlfriend/boyfriend has done it?
46. Is there anything particular in bed that they have never done but so want to try?
47. Is your partner a ‘take charge’ kind of person or do they love to be dominated?
48. What are their thoughts on threesomes? Have they ever had one?
49. What are some non-sexual actions or things that turn your partner on?
50. Who is on your partner’s list of the top five celebrities they would like to have sex with?
51. What’s your bae’s wildest sexual fantasy?
52. Have any of their sexual fantasies come true?
53. Do they have any fetish regarding a particular body part?
54. What’s the first thing that sexually attracts your partner to someone?
55. How does porn work for them?
56. If nobody’s watching, where would your partner like to have sex?
57. What are their most sensitive erogenous zones?
58. If being honest, who do they fantasize about while touching themselves?
59. What is their idea of dressing sexy?
60. Is your boyfriend/girlfriend open to the idea of going sex toy shopping with you?
Related Reading: Sexual Compatibility – Meaning, Importance and Signs
61. Has anyone ever walked in while they were having sex with someone?
62. Has your partner ever slept with someone on the first date?
63. Do they have any embarrassing sex stories to share?
64. What is it about you that your partner finds the most attractive?
65. What’s your partner’s favorite memory of sexual encounters with you?
66. What do they enjoy most during foreplay?
67. Foreplay – luxury or necessity?
68. Where do they like being kissed the most?
69. What’s your partner’s take on BDSM?
70. What’s their favorite sex position?
71. Car sex, phone sex, shower sex – what would they pick?
72. Has your partner had any traumatic experiences that affect their sex life?
73. How much do they value the role of consent in sex?
74. On a scale of 1 to 10, how would they rate your sex life?
75. Given the chance, will they ever do it in a movie theater or an elevator?
76. Can your partner ever sleep with someone without feeling any connection whatsoever?
77. Are they an advocate of safe sex? What’s their preferred mode?
78. Have they ever been diagnosed with a sexually transmitted disease?
79. Can a relationship end over bad sex? What do they think?
80. Is there a night of five times? What’s the magic number that your partner has reached in a single day?
Relationship and love questions for couples
Being in a relationship requires you to be aware of what your partner expects from you. How do they define love? What are the relationship deal breakers for them? Are you both on the same page about committing long-term or perhaps, being in an open relationship? These are all some valid deep relationship questions to ask your girlfriend/partner to make sure your visions about the future align. But before that, let’s see how many of these you can answer on your bae’s behalf:
81. At what age did your partner have their first kiss?
82. What is their definition of a perfect relationship?
83. Do they get insecure or jealous very easily?
84. What are the three things that your partner doesn’t like about you?
85. What are the qualities they often flex to impress a potential partner?
86. Have they ever fallen in love with a friend?
87. How many relationships did they have before you?
88. What are your bae’s thoughts on unconditional love?
89. What made them agree to go on/ask you for a second date?
90. Do your partner trust easily? Or does it take them time to build trust and dependency in a relationship?
91. Is there a friend or confidant they always turn to for help on relationship issues?
92. How and why did your partner’s last relationship end?
93. Do they believe in monogamous relationships?
94. Are there any deep-seated issues that get in the way of them committing to their partners?
95. How does your partner define cheating?
96. Do they consider emotional affairs as cheating?
97. Has your partner ever cheated or been cheated on?
98. What’s the worst breakup they had to go through?
99. What’s the lesson they learned from their last relationship?
100. How does your loved one feel about children?
Related Reading: 100 Deep Conversation Topics About Love And Life
101. What is his/her love language?
102. Do they have any kind of relationship insecurities?
103. Would your partner end things with someone if his/her friends didn’t get along with them?
104. How soon is too soon for them to drop the ‘L’ word?
105. At which stage of the relationship do they feel comfortable introducing their partner to the family?
106. What’s that one thing that’s always non-negotiable for them in a relationship?
107. Does your bae have any secret mantra for a happy, long-lasting relationship?
108. What prompts them to make an SOS call to their best friend to run away from a bad date night?
109. Are they a fan of corny pick-up lines?
110. Does your loved one believe in soulmates?
111. What kind of impact do they think you’ve made on their life?
112. What do they consider major red flags in a partner?
113. Do you think your partner would be able to forgive someone after being cheated on?
114. What is their fondest memory of your first date?
115. What’s your girlfriend/boyfriend’s idea of a perfect date night?
116. According to them, what’s the best gift a person can give their partner?
117. What is your partner’s preferred way of having the breakup talk – in person or over a text message?
118. What is their biggest relationship pet peeve?
119. Have your partner ever broken up another couple to get their way with one of them?
120. Can your partner fall in love with someone online without actually meeting them?
Fun questions about your partner
Looking for questions to get to know someone without giving it so much of a serious spin? We have plenty of examples for you! Whether you want to bond instantly as a newlywed couple or you have been dating for years, the more fun you have in a relationship, the more beautiful your connection becomes.
Knowing some of the funny stories about your partner and sharing a laugh or two can help you work through the hardest phases of a relationship. Then how about we make a list of super fun questions to ask your sweetheart if you aren’t already a master of their mischiefs and quirks? It will lighten up the mood and you can easily turn it into a how well do you know your partner game:
121. What superpowers would your bae like to have?
122. What’s the most useless talent your partner thinks he/she possesses?
123. What is their most embarrassing public moment?
124. Would your partner rather go on a roller coaster or take a stroll in the park?
125. What is the craziest thing they have ever done?
126. Have they ever been tricked into doing something dumb?
127. What is the weirdest food combo that your partner secretly loves?
128. Have they ever run away from a bad date?
129. What’s the cheesiest pick-up line your partner has ever used?
130. Have they ever lied to get out of a traffic ticket?
131. What’s the silliest prank they have ever pulled on someone?
132. Would your partner rather take a thousand dollars or break up with you?
133. Is your partner a master of procrastination?
134. If your partner was invisible for a day, which are places they’d visit?
135. If your bae were an animal, which one would they be?
136. What’s the one joke that always cracks them up?
137. According to them, what is the most fun thing about being in a relationship with you?
138. Have your partner ever crashed a wedding?
139. Have they ever ruined a karaoke night singing awfully bad?
140. Would your girlfriend/boyfriend rather stay home or go out on a Saturday night?
Related Reading: The Ultimate Funny Online Dating Questions
141. If they were a ghost, who are the people they would seriously like to spook?
142. Did your partner ever fail a test in school?
143. If you were to name your sweetheart after a cocktail, which one would you pick and why?
144. Have they ever had a wardrobe malfunction at a party?
145. Have they ever laughed out loud in a serious meeting? What prompted it?
146. Did your partner ever get caught cheating in exams?
147. What is their guilty pleasure?
148. Has your partner ever experienced love at first sight?
149. What would they rather pick – good looks or good conversation?
150. Does your girlfriend/boyfriend like to dance like no one is watching?
151. What are your partner’s first-date moves that never failed to score them a second one?
152. Is there anything on their bucket list that they want to do with you?
153. Does your partner find love texts cute or cringy?
154. What’s been your bae’s funniest trick-or-treat costume?
155. What, according to your SO, makes you unique as a couple?
156. What’s the weirdest place they have crashed at night?
157. Pick an emoji from your phone that best describes your partner.
158. What’s that one movie that they are embarrassed to have cried over?
159. How long can they go without taking a shower?
160. Till what age did your partner believe that Santa was real?
Random how well do you know your partner questions
Wait, I’ve got something extra for you! Relationships inevitably go through their share of ups and downs, and some patches where monotony of everyday life takes its toll on your bond. During times like these, communication is the first to take a serious hit. That’s when you need some conversation starters to mix things up a little. To that end, we bring you some random how well do you know your partner questions you can turn to when you just want to stir in an element of fun into your relationship:
161. What would your partner do if they won a million-dollar lottery?
162. Who is their favorite fictional character?
163. Which animal would they prefer to have as a pet?
164. What’s the best gift your bae has ever received?
165. What makes them cringe?
166. What is their dream vacation?
167. What does your girlfriend/boyfriend hate the most about their work?
168. Have they ever fallen in love with a character from a book?
169. What do they like to do to unwind after a long day?
170. What’s your partner’s favorite restaurant for a date night?
171. If they can go back in time and undo one life mistake, which one would it be?
172. What was your partner’s first job?
173. What was your partner’s favorite subjects in school?
174. What’s their favorite movie that they want you to watch?
175. Does your partner believe in ghosts?
176. What is their dream car?
177. Would they like to learn a new language? Which one?
178. Does your partner drink alcohol for fun or to escape reality?
179. Are they a cat person or a dog person?
180. What’s your bae’s go-to song?
181. Who’s their favorite travel partner or do they like to fly solo?
182. How many countries have your partner traveled to so far?
183. What’s their favorite color?
184. Name one of their favorite TV shows that they never tire of watching
185. Does your partner have a five-year plan chalked out or do they live in the moment?
186. What are their political views?
187. What’s a life philosophy your partner follows and preaches religiously?
188. What do they consider their greatest weakness?
189. Is your partner a feminist?
190. Have they ever had surgery?
191. Have they ever met an accident?
192. What was a turning point in your partner’s life?
193. What’s their source of motivation in life?
194. Who are their go-to people in a crisis?
195. Does your partner have trouble saying ‘no’ to people?
196. Do they cry often or do they see it as a sign of weakness?
197. What’s your girlfriend/boyfriend’s definition of success?
198. Where do they want to build their dream house?
199. What’s the fun part about your partner’s retirement plan?
200. Have they ever broken up with a friend?
201. What makes your bae happy in life?
We hope this compilation of fun and interesting questions about your partner will offer you insights into where you stand in this relationship and identify areas you can work on to improve your intimacy. Studies have shown trying to know your partner more closely increases your ability to decipher the reasons behind their reactions to certain events and situations, which, in turn, impacts your response and the health of the relationship as a whole.
So, take your pick from intense emotional to light-hearted questions depending on your mood for the day and see for yourself how well do you know your partner. Obviously, this love quiz becomes more effective when you both take turns and answer with utmost sincerity.
This article has been updated in March, 2023.