Being single has its own benefits. Being single means you can find fulfillment without depending on others and it’s a great state to be in. But there are times you might feel alone. How to not feel lonely when you are single, that’s what we will discuss today.
But it’s easier said than done. However, your single-hood most definitely shouldn’t define your happiness. So what if you haven’t found the right one yet? You are still surrounded by a lot of amazing people who care about you.
Being in a relationship isn’t a cure for all your life worries (in fact it’s the opposite in many cases), but when you are not in a relationship its normal to feel blue from time to time.
The world around you looks like a big blob of couples that drop on your single life when your heart aches to have someone beside you to share your life with.
We get the feeling and we also understand why it’s easier to get drowned in the loneliness of your single life. So here’s how to not feel lonely when you are single.
Related Reading: Lonely After Divorce: Why Men Find It So Hard To Cope
How To Not Feel Lonely When You Are Single
But being single doesn’t mean you have to feel lonely. Even the most perfect couples feel lonely from time to time, because it’s human! Moreover, you don’t need to be in a relationship to have fun and socialise with like-minded people. You can do all of that on your own.
Is it normal to feel loneliness when you are single? Yes it is. We understand that loneliness is inevitable and dealing with it gets difficult when you are single. Which is why we are going to take you for a walk around this single life and offer you a change of perspective.
1. Being single is your choice
A friend of mine always said, “In today’s day and age you can get married as many times you want to and you stay happily single if you want to.” He is absolutely right.
Society often looks at single people with sympathy thinking that love or marriage never happened to them. That’s not really true. It could be that they chose the single life.
But we believe that it’s not necessary that choice has to be lived all their life. A single person can decide to have a partner at the age of 50 and if you look around you would see that is happening and people are stepping into more mature and fulfilling relationships.
It doesn’t matter if you are in your 30s or 40s, you will find someone despite what the ‘odds’ say if you are ready to believe in it. It’s tempting to succumb to a depressive state of ‘I’m never going to find someone’ but nobody knows what tomorrow may bring. If anything is constant in the universe, it’s change. So, to change your relationship status on Facebook you first have to start believing that the change will come sooner or later.
2. Acknowledge the change
To be ready to acknowledge that change when it comes knocking on your door you must focus on becoming a better version of you. Instead of looking for someone who can complete you (meaning, you are not whole to begin with) use your single-hood to work on yourself well enough so that someone will feel lucky for being your date!
It’s because self-improvement is more important for every single human being that being in a relationship. So now that you finally have some me time, put it to good use instead of sulking with boredom and loneliness let us tell you how not to be lonely when you are single.
Connect with yourself. Let go off the past. Learn to accept and move on. Reflect on your thoughts and discard the unnecessary ones. Use this time to build a new ‘You’.
3. Meet new people, have new experiences
Not having a romantic relationship right now shouldn’t stop you from enjoying life. Plan a night out with your friends or throw an in-house slumber party. Go visit that museum you have always wanted to. If none of your friends have the time, go solo.
It’s not sad; it just means you are enough for yourself. Surround yourself with the kind of company that doesn’t make you feel bad about yourself and spend some quality time.
A friend of mine is 40 and single. She did have some relationships but nothing worked out for the long term. Instead of sitting and sulking over her single status she took up solo travel.
Now that’s how she earns her living. She is travel blogger and has best selling books to her credit. She has a fulfilling life and travels the earth meeting new people everyday.
4. Don’t look at dating apps as a desperate move
While you are at it, get active on Tinder. Don’t look at it as a desperate move to find a mate. It just means you want to stay abreast of what’s going on in the dating zone. Plus it gives you a quick ego boost! There are plenty of other dating apps that you can also check out.
When you like somebody over there don’t be afraid to initiate a conversation and see where it goes. It doesn’t have to end up as a romantic adventure, but socialising with new people is always a fun thing to do and a great way to feel less lonely.
5. Be passionate about what you do
Be it your career or a hobby if you are passionate about it you will look forward to it everyday. You will not feel lonely when you are single. In fact, being self contented will help you to connect with other people when you are looking for love.
Single people become loathsome company when they are perpetually complaining about their single status, talking about how they have to do things alone – from paying the bills to taking out the trash to looking after aging parents.
If you are looking for good conversations and fruitful company that would mean you have to make your own personality a positive and attractive one. If you feel happy with yourself and happy about the things you do then only you will attract the right people to you.
Related Reading: 20 Rules Of Dating A Single Dad
How Can I Be Happy Being Single?
If we are telling you how not be lonely when you are single then we should be able to answer your question: “How can I be happy being single?” There a few things you can do to increase your happiness quotient. Here they are:
- Think of it this way you get better sleep because you have the whole bed to yourself.
- You don’t have to get up in the morning, earlier than your own work hours, to make tea for your partner or get the kids ready for school.
- Single women have better mental health than married women a study shows.
- You have all the freedom to use your time the way you please. You can spend more time at work, indulge in a hobby or just put your feet up and read a book.
- Your money is your own and you decide on how you want to spend or save it. You don’t have to get into squabbles with a spendthrift spouse.
- You invest time in your friendships and you can just be yourself around them.
- And just remember when you have sex it might be less frequent than people in relationships but it is much more fulfilling.
Investing your time and energy in a relationship to ensure it works out the way you want is a gamble. Sometimes it clicks, sometimes it leaves you feeling shattered. But in no case your special someone could safeguard you forever from feeling lonely. It’s a part of your existence and only you, nobody but you, can help yourself to find a way to get past the loneliness.