While some women are confident and open about their feelings, that’s not the case with the ones who are reserved. Such women will slyly give you hints and you need to be highly vigilant to catch the signs a shy girl has a crush on you.
As per research, shy women fear rejection, which is why they keep their feelings to themselves even if it hurts them. Instead, they’ll drop subtle hints and, at times, not-so-subtle hints. They do this to let you know that they’re interested in you without actually saying it. They want you to approach them so that they won’t have to deal with the fear of rejection if they ask you out first.
So will a shy girl ignore her crush altogether? Well, she might, but not exactly. In this guide, we’ll tell you how to know if a shy girl likes you without talking to her. We will also give you tips on how to talk to a shy girl and make her comfortable.
21 Subtle Signs A Shy Girl Has A Crush On You
If you’re confused about whether a shy girl has a crush on you or not, the following points should be enough to guide you to a proper conclusion on most occasions. Do note that every person is unique and she might not tick all the boxes even if she adores you. Treat this list as a guide.
1. She’s super talkative on text but super quiet in person
Will a shy girl ignore her crush? Well, a reserved woman isn’t confident when you meet her in person. However, that’s not the case when you meet her online. When a shy girl has a crush on you, she’ll talk animatedly on texts. Therefore, know that she is not ignoring you in person, she is just not confident enough to show her real personality to you face to face.
She wants you to approach her but just isn’t brave enough to say it to you directly. While the reason is known, it’s still amazing to see how she transforms into a super quiet person after being super talkative online. One of the few signs a shy girl likes you but is trying to hide it is that she’ll ignore everyone but you in person.
2. She helps you out even if it’s inconvenient for her
If a shy girl has a crush on you, she’ll go out of her way to help you out. This is one of the biggest examples of how she drops subtle hints that she is into you. An example of this could be how she volunteers to help you with your project work, even if her own deadlines are fast approaching. In case a shy girl has a crush on you at work, you’ll notice that she helps you out in your presentation even if she has plenty to do herself.
3. She finds you funny even if most people don’t
One of the most obvious signs a shy girl has a crush on you is that she’ll find you mostly hilarious.
- If a shy girl laughs insanely even at your most borderline funny jokes, chances are, she has a crush on you
- How to know if a shy girl likes you without talking to her about it? If you are someone who isn’t appreciated for their sense of humor regularly, the fact that she finds you funny when most people don’t is the answer to that
4. Her friends giggle when she’s around you
How does a shy girl react when she’s around you? Try to notice that. But more important is how her friends react. Do you notice that her friends giggle when she’s around you, or she’s walking past you, or tease her when you enter the room? If your answer to any of these questions is yes, then this is among the most obvious signs a shy girl has a crush on you.
5. She’s interested in knowing about your life
In general, when you’re interested in someone, what’s the first thing you do? Try to find out more about them! Your shy girl would do the same if she likes you.
- If you notice that she suddenly asks you more questions to try to get to know you better, she might like you
- A shy girl can ask you these questions directly or she prefers to learn about you through your mutual friends, in a non-creepy way
- When someone wants to know everything about a person, it usually means that they care about the latter
- So, if a girl is interested in knowing everything about your life, your likes and dislikes, your goals, even your family members, it could mean that she’s into you
6. A shy girl remembers even the most unimportant details about you
Does she often mention various, often inconsequential, events from your past that meant a lot to you? This may be a sign that she is interested in you. People tend to pay more attention to someone’s details or stories when they are romantically interested in them.
Reserved women in particular tend to make a mental note of these instances. If she remembers details such as your opinion on a random movie to that friend whom you miss but only mentioned in passing, chances are, she’s into you.
7. She becomes friends with your group to know more about you
Since a shy girl doesn’t feel confident enough to talk to you directly, she’ll try to become friends with your group. This way, she gets to learn more about you without asking you directly.
Rachel, a student from Philadelphia, shares, “I would get very shy around my crush and wouldn’t be able to put two sentences together. Even though I wanted to know everything about him, I was unable to ask him questions. So I became friends with his friends instead. I’d blush while talking about him, but I did finally understand him and get the courage to talk to him”.
Related Reading: 26 Love Yourself Quotes to Build Your Confidence
8. Her friends try to become your friends to find out more about you
Similarly, her friends might try to become friends with you. They do this to not only find out more details about you, but also to gauge if you’re right for her. They’re perfectly aware of who she is, what’s good for her and what’s not, which is why they do their best to ensure you’re suitable for her.
9. She blushes a lot when you compliment her
Any person, regardless of gender, can experience uncontrollable blushing when talking to their crush. This means that a shy individual can easily blush due to embarrassment or discomfort. A great way to find out if a shy girl likes you is to compliment her or even subtly flirt with her. If your crush turns red when you smile, it could mean that she reciprocates your feelings.
However, there is a fine line between flirting with someone subtly and coming on too strong. You should always pay attention to the verbal and non-verbal cues when you do this with a person who’s reserved. If there is even the slightest hint of discomfort, stop flirting immediately. Remember to ask yourself, healthy flirting isn’t damaging but are you crossing the line? You also need to be present and observant to understand whether she blushes while receiving compliments from anyone or acts differently around you.
Related Reading: Want To Make Someone Blush? Here Are 12 Adorable Ways!
10. She’s nervous or awkward around you while she is otherwise calm and composed
If a shy girl is awkward, tongue-tied, or nervous around you while being generally calm, there’s a chance that she’s into you. Quora user, Savannah Jaye, writes, “On the off chance that I do somehow end up in a conversation with my crush (i.e. I am talking with a mutual friend, and he joins in), I tend to completely lose my cool”. Her being awkward or nervous around you can also be considered among the signs a shy girl likes you but is trying not to show it.
11. You find her looking at you multiple times in a day
Quora User, Lanie, shares her perspective on the topic, “If a shy girl has a crush on you, she will NEVER EVER look directly at you, even when you enter the room.” You’ll find that she steals glances at you multiple times a day. This is obvious as she isn’t able to maintain eye contact with most people, let alone the person she likes. However, you can only arrive at this conclusion if she steals glances at you and nobody else.
12. A shy girl would lean toward you if she likes you
It’s said that girls lean toward those they are comfortable with. John-Paul Wilson, a Quora writer, says, “It’s a sign that she’s physically comfortable with you, but not necessarily a strong indicator of romantic interest. Like most things, it depends a lot on context. If she’s leaning on you for support while tying her shoe, that’s not very significant at all. If you’re sitting side by side and she leans her head on your shoulder that probably indicates some affection, though it need not be romantic”.
So you need to be able to differentiate the body language signs of attraction during different situations. If she is interested in you, you’ll also find her giving you just a small brush of touch while walking past you quite frequently.
13. She shows her love indirectly through her social media posts
If you want to know something about a person in today’s world, you need only check their social media. According to a study, social media use has skyrocketed over the past decade and a half by almost 70%. And another research reported that “social media provided better chances to self-disclosure: it was easier to tell some things about yourself or you just happened to reveal information via social media to your partner that you would not necessarily say otherwise.”
No wonder a shy girl will let you know that she’s interested through her social media posts and activities. An example of this could be sending you posts about romantic songs and movies. This should also be considered among the most obvious signs a shy girl has a crush on you. While this is something that most friends do as well, it can be a sign that a shy girl likes you.
- This is especially true if she keeps sending you pictures and images that remind her of you
- Additionally, if she’s interested in you, she’s more likely to like and/or comment on all of your pictures, even if they don’t naturally appear on her timeline
- If she is interested in you, she may drop subtle hints about you in her social media posts. It can be the lyrics of your favorite song or she might tag you in a quote
Related Reading: 21 Flirting Signs From A Woman You Never Knew About
14. She does her best to look great when she’s with you
As they say, presentation is everything! You can see it whenever someone tries to woo their love. The same can be said about shy girls. If she suddenly changes her appearance when she’s around you, it could be a sign that she likes you. You will notice changes in the way she dresses and styles her hair. Being nervous, she doesn’t talk much, but she tries to make you notice her. So she keeps changing her appearance to attract your attention.
If she acts differently around you by going the extra mile whenever she’s with you, this could be a sign that she has a crush on you.
15. She takes an interest in your hobbies even if they don’t naturally interest her
If she’s taking an interest in your hobbies which don’t interest her naturally, it could indicate she’s into you. Examples of this could be:
- She’s a fan of thrillers and scary movies, but she starts taking an interest in romantic movies, knowing you’re a fan of those
- She starts to play or learn about the sport you love
- She might start to read the kinds of books you read
16. She finds ways to keep the conversation going
While a shy girl won’t usually initiate a conversation, she’ll do her best to keep the conversation going if she’s into you. She’s perfectly aware of her skills when it comes to initiating a chat, so she makes it up by stretching it as much as possible. Don’t assume she’s playing hard to get because she’s just a shy girl waiting for you to make the first move.
- She may be reticent about sharing her personal stories, but she’s always ready to listen to yours
- You will be surprised to hear yourself pouring your heart out while she patiently listens
- She likes to hear things you thought someone would never be interested in. That’s because she wants to get to know you better
Related Reading: 25 Ways To Keep A Conversation Going With A Girl
17. Her voice gets slightly louder when she’s with you
It’s said that a girl’s voice increases when she’s with those she likes. If the same happens when she’s with you, this could also be a sign. Abby Rose, Quora user, shares, “If a girl’s voice is not naturally high in pitch, and you notice this change around you, the chances she likes you are great. This is common in girls who are attracted to a boy or father figure. Higher pitched voices are seen as attractive or youthful by certain males and just happens naturally in females when they are around a guy they like or favor.”
Furthermore, this research shows that we change the tone of our voice while talking to someone we’re into, in hopes of making a romantic connection.
18. She waits for you to complete your work
If a shy girl has a crush on you at work, she’ll wait for you to complete your work so that you can both leave the office together. She realizes that she doesn’t have the confidence to talk to you in front of everyone, so it’s best to wait for a time when there are few people around, and spend time with you.
19. She copies your mannerisms unknowingly
When we like someone, we copy some aspect of their mannerisms unknowingly and the same applies here. Nick Hobson, a behavioral and brain scientist, says in this Forbes article, “If a person likes you, they will spontaneously mimic your physical postures and gestures. This ‘affiliative mimicry’ is an ancient evolved process rooted in the brain’s Mirror Neuron System which is the social glue that binds people together”.
Sean Kernan, a Quora user, shares his opinion, “If a girl has a crush on you, even the shyest girl, there are always signs. The signs are often subconscious behaviors.”
20. She compliments you regularly
A shy girl who has a crush on you will compliment you regularly in hopes of winning you over. If a girl likes you, she notices everything about you and compliments you.
- It could be the way you talk or the way you play sports
- Women know that compliments can get one very far and this is her subtle way of flirting with you
- While complimenting, she’ll often give you just a small brush of touch. Physical touch is a great indicator of a shy girl’s interest in you. She’ll communicate more through her actions rather than words
21. You often find her at your favorite spots
Someone who has a crush on you will do their best to find out your likes and dislikes. This includes your favorite spots to hang out. If she’s shy, but not introverted, she will start hanging out at your favorite spots in hopes of catching you there and spending time with you.
Related Reading: How Do Introverts Flirt? 10 Ways They Try To Get Your Attention
How To Talk To A Shy Girl And Make Her Comfortable
Now that you are aware of the signs a shy girl has a crush on you, it’s time to address how to talk to her and get her to open up. Talking to a shy girl is a tricky thing because, on one hand, you want to know what she thinks of you. On the other hand, you don’t want to overwhelm her and be a part of an unpleasant memory that will live in her head for a long time. Therefore, be careful and gentle in your approach. Follow the steps mentioned below to know how to talk to a shy girl and make her comfortable:
- Approach her when she is relatively alone, is not in a group, and is in a public place
- You can ask a mutual friend to arrange an appropriate time and place for a meeting. Alternatively, you can approach her via social media
- Since she’s shy, you’re going to have to ask interesting questions to make the conversation flow. Start with questions like how her day was and how she’s doing first, then move on to her area of interests
- Give her time to answer and don’t make any assumptions about her
- If the meeting goes well, ask her if you can meet again
John-Paul Wilson, the Quora writer mentioned above, wrote further, “It’s generally impossible to be sure someone likes you from hints and signals alone. Some people are totally blind to such signals, while others are apt to over-interpret every little gesture as a sign of interest. It doesn’t really matter though. Whether she was signaling that she likes you or not, if you ever want to go out with her, you’re still going to have to put your cards on the table and ask her out. Until she actually asks you out herself, that’s the only way it’s going to happen.”
- A shy girl will go out of her way to help you, even if it’s not convenient for her
- Other signs include being super talkative on texts and super quiet in person
- Also among the signs a shy girl has a crush on you, she is awkward, tongue-tied, and clumsy around you while she is calm and composed otherwise
- Be gentle and cautious while approaching a shy girl, as you don’t want to overwhelm her
That was our take on the signs a shy girl has a crush on you. Here’s hoping we were of some help on the matter, and you will now be able to detect her feelings. While we wish you the best of luck for your future, on the odd chance that she is not into you, let her know that this won’t affect your friendship and move on.
The road to a shy girl’s heart is through small things that let her know you care, and that you pay attention to her. Spend a lot of time getting to know her and letting her get to know you. Make her feel comfortable. Building trust is the key to a relationship with a shy girl.
Well, a shy and reserved woman isn’t usually very confident when she has to interact with someone in person. So, even if she likes you, she won’t be able to talk to you much, or make a lot of eye contact. This might feel like she is ignoring you and doesn’t like you, but you need to look out for the signs listed above to see if she’s just shy or if she actually isn’t that into you.