Being in love and having the other person feel the same way about you is a beautiful journey. However, not all relationships last forever, and unfortunately, a lot of them result in break-ups. Break-ups and heartbreaks are devastating. After a breakup, you have many thoughts and one of them is whether a guy regrets hurting you or has moved on already. It is natural that you will miss the other person and spend a lot of time crying.
Your mind will also be racing with questions and you will find yourself looking for signs that could indicate that he regrets hurting you.
Perhaps you need to know for your own peace of mind or you want to know so that you can rekindle the relationship. But at times, no matter how much you want it, guys move on easily after a breakup and do not have any regrets.
Sometimes, guys hurt you and leave you for their own stupid reasons but eventually start to regret hurting you. They feel guilty and will go out of their way to do things for you when they feel remorse about hurting you.
Their guilt starts eating away at them and you will see a drastic change in his behaviour. He will start checking up on you more often, bring up the past or say how sorry he is. Sometimes guys just stay silent and it’s hard to decipher how they feel inside.
Related Reading: 21 Do’s And Don’ts When Starting A New Relationship
How Do You Know If Your Ex Regrets Breaking Up With You?
So, how long does it take for a guy to regret breaking up with you? A day, weeks, or months? This entirely depends on how long and serious your relationship was. It also depends on what the issue was that caused the breakup.
After the breakup, most guys will show you that the break up hasn’t affected them at all and they are enjoying their new single life. You can read here for the differences one faces while dating and being single.
Your man will probably have a new found love for social media and you will see more pictures of him partying and his ‘perfect life’. After the literal and metaphorical hangover of his partying wears off, he will probably go MIA. These are signs he regrets hurting you.
He won’t text or call anyone much and he will go silent for some time. This is when the realities of your breakup will start hitting him and regret will kick in. Read this story of a man who still loves his ex and regrets breaking up with her.
Did he dump you? If he did you might find signs of dumper’s remorse like he would drunk text you, call you on your birthday and if you pass by the coffee shop you used to frequent, you might see him sitting there alone.
There would be signs that he knows he messed up because he would send fillers through his friends. He want want you back and his life.
Breakups are not easy, even for the ones who dump their partners. But if he regrets it there will be signs he feels guilty for hurting you.
For whatever reasons a break up happens, everyone does wonder whether it was a right call or not.
9 Signs He Regrets Hurting You
He won’t let you know just yet that he feels guilty about hurting you. If he is feeling overwhelmed by his emotions, he won’t be mature about the situation and tell you that he regrets hurting you. Perhaps, he wants to get back together with you.
Perhaps, he wants both of you to move on now but he regrets the breakup. These are the things about breakups that no one will tell you. You will not get a direct answer from him so you will need to look for signs that will tell you that he regrets hurting you.
If he was the one who called it quits there will be signs of dumpers remorse and he would show signs that he is still in love with his ex.
1. He will be quieter than usual
You will notice that he is more quiet than usual. It is understandable that after a break-up the conversation between you guys will reduce, but you will notice that he converses less and less with your mutual friends as well.
This does not mean that his social life will come to a half but simply that he will be putting on an act of having a good time. Guys are usually good at suppressing their feelings and putting on a show in public but when you look closely you will be able to tell that their smiles aren’t genuine and their laughs aren’t real.
Read about this couple that has made laughing at each other a big part of their relationship. When you ask him why he does not seem to be enjoying himself, he will make excuses and blame it on sleep or other issues. Chances are that his guilt and regret are stopping him from truly enjoying himself. These are signs he regrets losing you.
2. He checks on you more than usual
Even after your breakup, he will be worried about you and will constantly call you and message you to make sure you are okay.
In the early stages of the breakup, he might not ask you directly but will ask your best friends for updates. You will be confused by his behaviour because if he truly cared about you so much then why did he end things with you.
Remember that when you ask yourself, “Does he regret breaking up with me? Is this a sign he regrets hurting me?“ You have your answer right here.
His guilt is making him realize his mistake and he regrets hurting you. He wants to check up on you to see how you are coping with the situation.
This is a sign that he knows he messed up and can’t just tell you that on your face. Neither can he get out of the habit of staying in touch with you all day. That’s why he tries to connect constantly with some pretext or another.
Related reading: 15 Subtle signs your partner is going to break up with you soon
3. He shows he is too happy
He will make a big show to everyone about how much he enjoys being single again. He will post on social media and share posts about the perks of his new single life. When you see him, he will smile at you and talk as if nothing ever happened.
He will behave as if he is the most optimistic person in the world. Never have his friends seen him this way. He will keep talking about how great everything is and how light he feels.
This happiness will be so extreme that it will be easy for you to see through it and realize how fake it is. If someone asks him about the breakup, he might talk about it for a few seconds and then change the topic to something happier because he has not fully accepted how much guilt and regret he feels.
Not talking about it is a sign that he knows he messed up and he really regrets hurting you. It gives him pain when the topic of your breakup is brought up and he can’t bring himself to talk about it.
4. He can’t stop showing up
Whether it’s a common friend’s party or any small get together, he will find a way to be there. He will suddenly take an active interest in your friends and will want to insert himself in any plans that involve you.
After a relationship, it is obvious that you will have many mutual friends but if you find him showing up at events he would not normally be present at then this could mean he regrets losing you.
Sometimes you might even find him at your favorite spots like your regular restaurant or supermarket. He might even become a little bit of a stalker and show up outside your workplace or your home.
It may seem like a strange coincidence but he knows your schedule and knows where to find you. Is this cute or creepy? that is for you to decide.
5. He will change for you
He knows you inside out and as a result, also knows ways to win you back. He won’t be direct with grand romantic gestures but his actions will make it clear that he wants you back.
When you both were in a relationship you might have told him to quit smoking or maybe you told him to stop wearing his favourite shoes that you found comical.
You both probably even fought about this but there was no change in his behaviour.
All of a sudden you will notice that he is taking all your criticism into consideration and is a completely different person. These gestures may be sweet but they won’t fix what was wrong with the relationship. But these are signs he feels guilty for hurting you.
Related Reading: 15 Reasons Your Man Never Texts You First But Always Replies To You
6. He will find ways to talk to you
Your ex-boyfriend is probably extremely guilt-ridden at the moment. He regrets losing you and despite trying to stay away from you he is unable to control his urges and he calls/texts you a lot. He ends up sending you emojis too.
He probably feels that talking to you will make you feel better and this, in turn, will make him feel better. You will notice that he is very active on his phone and is having long conversations with you.
He will reply to your messages in seconds which is strange for a guy who has just broken up with you. He will call you or text you for little things and want your advice on it – be it what to order for food today or which series to binge-watch.
This is his way of saying that even after the breakup, you mean something to him. He probably misses you. This is an interesting article about how you might not miss your ex but miss being in love.
7. He tries to make you laugh
Just because your relationship did not work out and he may have dumped you for some reason, it doesn’t mean that he stopped caring about you.
He knows that you are very hurt because of the breakup and all he can think about is bringing back the joy in your life and making you your old self again.
He will crack jokes, make you laugh, and even try to cheer you up with your favourite food. You will see him going out of his way to bring you back to your cheerful and happy self. These are signs your ex regrets dumping you. You can find happiness again after a failed relationship.
Related reading: Five extreme things people do after a breakup
8. He apologizes
He feels sorry for hurting you. Eventually, he will open up to you and share his true feelings with you. He will apologize for hurting you and breaking your heart.
Some men might take time to apologize when they feel guilty about something but eventually their apology will be genuine and you will be able to see how sorry they feel for their mistakes.
He will tell you about his thoughts and feelings since the breakup and will ask for your forgiveness. He possibly regrets the breakup and wants another chance. Whether to forgive him or not is your call.
But he will tell you that he regrets losing you and the time away from you has given him the perspective he had been seeking.
He could tell you he realised that his life is empty without you. But have you moved on? It’s up to you how you want to deal with it.
9. He will want to get back with you
An ex who regrets breaking up with you will feel sorry for his actions and some part of him will tell him that he needs to fix this. But if he is talking only about his feelings then he is showing selfish boyfriend signs. Beware!
Sometimes his way of fixing things will be by trying to get you back. Feeling regret for hurting you is one of the worst things he feels right now and one of the ways for him to ease the pain is to try to win you back.
His guilt and regret maybe because he is still in love with you and can’t bear the fact that you won’t be in his life. Maybe it’s time for you to forgive.
He will tell you how wrong he was by breaking up with you. You need to reflect on your relationship and see if you want to get back with him. Only if you feel the relationship is worth saving.
Related Reading: 8 Steps to Win Over a Girl Who Rejected You
It is normal for people who initiated the break up to feel regret. Feelings for one another just don’t vanish with the breakup. The person who initiates the break up feels like they owe it to the other to fix things.
He regrets breaking up with you because he still cares for you and is doubting his decision to end the relationship. However, this might not always be the case.
You need to be smart about being able to distinguish between genuine concern your ex might have for you from him wanting to get back together with you.
If he says that he wants to get back with you, ask yourself whether it is a good idea and whether the problems in your relationship can really be fixed. Then only take your decision.
After a breakup a guy might take some time to realise what he has done. He could realise he has messed up and suffer from dumpers remorse. When he knows what he has lost, he would regret hurting you.
We wouldn’t tell you to be vengeful because it never works. There are ways to make him regret not choosing you but if we had our way we would rather move on and not look back. Karma finds its way. Trust us.
A man would regret losing you only if you are successful in maintaining the no contact rule. Stay away from him, don’t message or call, soon reality will hit him and he would regret losing you. This could be within a few weeks or within months of your breakup.
Most often they do. When their girl is around them they could call her clingy and say they want their own space and their old life back. But when she is not there, they realise what they have lost.