An introvert in love will leave their comfort zone but will also demand respect for their own quiet time. Introverts, stuck in a world that largely caters to extroverted people, are an oft-misunderstood group. The ways of expression have developed in such a way that many times the silence or non-talkativeness of introverts is misinterpreted. Do these things affect the way they fall in love? Is an introvert afraid of love? Not really. But when an introvert falls in love there are distinct ways he would show his love that is different from the average lover boy.
5 Things That Happen When An Introvert Falls In Love
When introverts fall in love they love differently. Any person in a relationship with an introvert will have to understand an introvert in love is not like any other person. They make the extra effort to do a lot of things because they are shy people and you will have to realise and appreciate that. Here are the things an introvert in love will do. And if you are thinking about how to make an introvert fall in love with you then these tips will really come handy.
1. They leave their comfort zone
Introverts tend to like their space, they are comfortable in silence and don’t need the noise of any sort, be that talking, music, or the sound of the television running in the background to fill up space. They don’t feel that space is empty without chatter, to begin with.
Taking this into account, if an introvert falls in love with an ambivert or an extrovert, it reflects in them being willing to leave their comfort zone. We must understand that introverts are wired differently, therefore a busy bar or a coffee shop might not be an ideal setting to hang out for them.
However, love trumps the discomfort and you see this when they are willing to put themselves in these settings without much trouble. I’m not trying to suggest that they make a great sacrifice for love. However, the trouble of being in an extroverted environment seems to be worth it if that means they get to spend time with their loved one. An introvert in love wants nothing more than that. Do not mistake an introvert to be someone with social anxiety. They aren’t really people who would break into cold sweats with people around but they simply don’t like to be in crowded places and talk too much.
Related Reading: Effective Tips From An Introvert On How To Date An Introvert
2. No small talk
Introverts aren’t a big fan of small talk. (I don’t think anyone is, to be honest; small talk is just plain exhausting, it’s like filler on the television that comes between the shows.) This works when it comes to dating in both of the persons’ favour and perfect for an introvert relationship.
Not wanting to talk about the weather, they can often directly go to the important things, the interesting conversations, which makes talking to them particularly enjoyable. You see, chatting is a special occasion of sorts for introverts and they have no time to waste discussing mundane things.
When they are getting to know you, they will ask you about life, love, what scares you, what moves you. In many ways, these conversations are more intimate and gratifying than the constant boring chatter that people engage in. An introvert in love will not talk about this and that but will be more specific.
While everyone likes good conversations, we often settle for the boring kinds, and introverts by default go silent and don’t converse if such conversations occur. For an introvert in love, this makes the whole courtship a deeper, more meaningful process. An introvert in love is a great conversationalist he just has to find that right connection and topics of mutual interest.
3. For an introvert in love, actions speak louder than words
Introverts are great at having deep conversations. But even when they aren’t speaking, their actions are more thoughtful. They tend to express love through actions than proclamations. They might buy you a small yet meaningful gift.
Their silence often makes them brilliant observers and therefore they might notice more things about you than others would, and follow up those things. They might take you out to a restaurant you passingly mentioned you wanted to visit, surprise you with your favourite bar of chocolate, plan elaborate birthday gifts that have stories attached to them.
They say I love you as many times as you might say it out loud, but instead of verbalising it, they put it out there as actions, like a silent proclamation of love. An introvert in love is an absolute delight. Since they are keen observers if they like you they will keep everything you say in their mind and you will be surprised with their elephantine memory.
4. An introvert in love is slow and steady
If you are about to date an introvert, remember one thing, you HAVE to take things slow. You see, taking things slow is always a good idea when it comes to romance, but it is especially prudent if you’re dealing with someone introverted.
Remember they don’t share things the way you do; their concept of love and boundaries is different. In the extroverted world, sharing is considered an act of caring; however, this sharing can turn into over-sharing and people tend to become open books on the first date.
There’s nothing wrong in that. Honesty is important in a relationship, but just because some people take time to open up about themselves doesn’t mean they are hiding something. Introverts take time to trust people; the silent person you are falling in love with is going through a storm of emotions in their mind. You must trust that they will reveal everything at the correct time. An introvert in love tends to say little but means what he or she says to the word. Therefore patience proves to be the best idea when you are in love with them.
They will go out of their way to accommodate you. They’ll go to the party that you want to go to, they’ll even start hanging out outside every day. But they will not rush things, neither will they be able to explain why. Just roll with it.
Related Reading: 20 Brilliant Tips For Dating A Shy Guy
5. Introverts in love value synchronicity
Everyone looks for a perfectly synced relationship. We all want things to be smooth and fun at the same time. But introverts value this synchronicity more than others. Their quiet time is important to them and while they will be willing to leave this quiet time to talk to you and go out, they will also need to go back to it once in a while. An introvert in love is looking for someone whom they can be silent with. A person with whom even silence is comfortable. He would want to sit with you with a cuppa and just watch the sunset.
Spending a quiet rainy day in bed, reading, making love, watching their favourite TV show is all they want. A partner that can respect this is a partner that introverts will be able to feel synchronicity with.
Now that we know all about what happens when an introvert falls in love, the next question that arises is:
Do Introverts Fall In Love Easy?
Well, yes and no. Introverts, like any other personality type, fall in love at a pace that is subjective to each individual. However introverts, unlike extroverts and ambiverts, don’t share how they feel with everyone around them.
So, if you have an introvert friend who suddenly tells you that they are in love, it might take you by surprise. But the truth is, they have silently been falling for this person over a long time. It’s just that they have only become comfortable enough to tell you now.
This is why it might seem like an introvert falls in in love easy. But the truth is, introverts in love aren’t like the rest. When an extrovert or even an ambivert starts developing feelings, they have to share their thoughts with someone. They speak to their friends and family and seek their opinion or just rant about their feelings.
This is not the case with introverts. They internalise their feelings instead of sharing them. Which is why it might seem like they fall in love easier than the rest since you don’t know their thoughts in advance.
However, in some cases, if you have really caught an introvert’s fancy, they might free fall for you. Even if you are an extrovert.
There is much debate around the topic of introvert-extrovert relationships. If you are an extrovert falling for an introvert and vice versa, you needn’t fret. We are here to answer your question
Do Extrovert And Introvert Relationships Work?
Ever heard the phrase, opposites attract? This is true to a large extent. However, sometimes, our differences can also separate us. Yes, opposites do attract. But attraction is not the answer to making a relationship work. That takes consistent effort on the part of both partners. So, the answer to “do extrovert and introvert relationships work?” is: Yes, if you both want to make it work! If you love your partner and value your relationship, chances are, that your extrovert introvert relationship will work.
How to make an introvert extrovert relationship work
Here are a few things that you can be mindful of while dating someone of a different personality type:
- Embrace your differences– Accept them the way they are, for who they are. You love this person, and with love comes accepting both the good and the not so good parts of your partner
- Learn to give each other space– Loving an introvert is not easy for an extrovert and vice versa. But one of the best things you can do while dating an introvert is to give them personal space when they seem like they need it
- Listen to them. Listening and not hearing, is important. Especially while dealing with an expressive extroverted partner
- Communicate with your partner– This is exceedingly important in introvert-extrovert relationships since you both look at the world in completely different ways. Making the other person understand your PoV is essential and can only be done through effective communication
- Find activities that you both enjoy- Finding common ground on things will make your relationship work. Yes, you are very different people but as long as you have things you agree on and activities you can do together and enjoy together, you have a strong bond
- Reject the theory “My way or the highway”- If you refuse to alter and adjust to your partner, this isn’t going to work. We all love doing things a certain way. But to make relationships work, we have to accommodate our partners’ ways of doing things too as change is a part of every relationship
If you already find yourself doing these things, then your introvert-extrovert relationship is going to work. A relationship doesn’t have to be fireworks all the time; the silences are equally important. It is these shared silences that introverts look for when they are in love. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if you are an introvert or an extrovert. You know when you are in love. And if you really love someone and they love you, you will find ways to be with them because it will be worth it.