Can You Be Friends With Your Ex’s Friends?

My Questions and Answers | | Expert Author , Psychotherapist & Relationship Counselorℹ️
Updated On: July 16, 2022
Friends With Your Ex’s Friends
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I was in a relationship for 3 years with my high school sweetheart. Since we went to the same college our friends’ group was the same and we all used to hang out a lot. We had friends we made together and our best friends also started hanging out with each other. Two months ago we broke up due to his plan of settling abroad. Since then my ex’s friend messaged me. I have been thinking, can you be friends with your ex’s friends?

Can You Be Friends With Your Ex’s Friends?

I took some time off and stopped socializing and going out to process my feelings. The friends more or less picked sides and recently I got a text from my ex’s best friend. It was a general, “How are you? Been long let’s catch up.” I was a bit surprised.

Related Reading: 8 Things To Do When An Ex Contacts You Years Later

Why are my ex’s friends being nice to me?

I found it a bit odd considering his best friend hadn’t reached out to me even once since the breakup. While we were together, I cherished these friendships and wouldn’t mind continuing being friends. I am wondering though, why are my ex’s friends contacting me and are being nice to me? Does this mean my ex is still asking about me?

Would there be any complications?

Can I be friends with my ex’s pals without making it complicated? Will this prevent me from moving on? Their interest means they want to convey information to my ex? Is that okay?

Related Reading: How To Get Over A Crush – 18 Practical Tips

Hello Dear,

I hope you are feeling better now that a few months have passed since your breakup.

There could be reasons why your ex’s friends are messaging you

Getting sudden messages from friends of an ex can be due to various reasons – they liked you as a friend / they remembered you for some reason ( reason may or may not be related to your ex) / or they may feel that you are single and ready to mingle.

Do you want to connect to your ex?

Reasons are aplenty, but reasons apart, you need to ask yourself – are you ready to move on in your life or do you still want to connect to your ex?

If you want to stay connected (difficult to predict how things will be) then it’s best to contact him directly rather than through his friends.

Do you want to move on?

If you are ready to move on, then move on without having complicated friendships ( it will be almost impossible to keep your ex out of it) with his friends.

You can be friends with your ex’s friends but it will not be the smooth friendship you had with them before. Like they would pass on news about you to your ex they would also tell you all details of who your ex is seeing and all those romantic details. Do you really want to get into that? The no contact rule works much better than being in touch with friends who will constantly give you information about them.

Moving on is better

It’s a beautiful world out there with plenty of wonderful people. You will definitely find your own set of new friends.

Move on, avoid complicated relationships, keep it simple and live life to the fullest!

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