(As told to Priya Chaphekar)
What is this thing I feel?
When you grow up in a particular way, you have no control whatsoever over your sexual orientation. You’re mentally conditioned to be attracted to people of the opposite sex, so when you start having feelings for people from the same sex, it suddenly hits you and you’re like, “I know I’m not gay. But I’m definitely not straight.”
The road to discovery
Bisexuality, for me, was more subconscious than anything. The advent of teenage brought with it the awareness of the fact that I was an exceedingly sexual person. The tingly feelings had set in and I realised that when I did something about ‘that’ tingly feeling, it felt nice. Nevertheless, I was still a child on a wet and wild exploration.
My first boyfriend was someone I fell for. I didn’t know he was part of the LGBTQ community (I wish I could tell you how, but he won’t be too happy about it), and even when I found out, I felt nothing abnormal about it. It was after I turned 16 that I started reading about these things and that blew me over. I discovered that there are people of different sexualities and that not every gay guy or girl hits on a straight person.
I discovered that there are people of different sexualities and that not every gay guy or girl hits on a straight person.
Curious as a magpie, I plunged into the unknown waters, clueless about the path ahead.