15 ways to get a man to chase you

Shobha Mahapatra
man chasing woman

My aunt was always the talk of the town. Being the most desirable woman in the neighbourhood, she was often spotted with one charming man or another. She lived a glorious dating life. And then one day, to everyone’s surprise, she married my uncle. When asked if she missed her dating days, she enthusiastically said yes!

Click here to read about the different types of husbands there are.

And when I asked, “What is the best part about dating, aunt?”
Her eyes lit up, and she said, “Making a man chase you!”

15 ways to get a man to chase you

You read it right. Every woman wants to be tracked; to be made exclusive and wanted. And no, there is nothing vain or ridiculous about it. It’s innate. Deep inside, we all know how much we enjoy the adrenaline rush of being pursued. It’s the same way for a man too. He wants to win his ladylove by hook or by crook. The fact that he would follow you to the ends of the world is a testimony to his desire and love for you.

Click here to read an exciting story about how this couple’s love was tested by the Mumbai rains.
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Only he gets to have you, no one else.

But there’s the catch. Women, you should play hard to get only when you know that it’s worth it. Your feelings must be real. You must want to be in a relationship with him. Otherwise, you would be doing something vain and evil at the same time because you will be leading on to boost your ego.

So, how to make a man fall hard for you and all the worthy reasons why you should make him chase you? Let’s find out.

1. Be a woman of substance

If you have studied male psychology, you should know: Men love physical beauty, but they value a strong, competent, and independent woman more. If you want the best of men to fall for you, then you have to become the best version of yourself. Work hard, party harder, love your life, be kind; and watch him crave to be a part of your life!

Click here to read the 10 things women do that annoy men and try avoiding them.

2. Never judge a man by his looks

Also, by his gifts. He might be the modern Mr Darcy and might shower gifts like Christian Grey, but don’t fall for it. Look beyond his charm and wealth. Note his efforts. Is he trying to squeeze in some time from his crazy work schedule? Does he remember that little piece of personal life that you shared? If yes, then you are one lucky lady. If you come across a woman that is easily pleased by expensive gifts and physical appearance, the man you are trying to attract may not think that you are worth his time and efforts. However, this does not mean that being attracted to someone for the way they look isn’t natural, of course it is! But, it is just as important to look past their outer glamour and examine their personality.

If you are considering committing to someone long-term, we highly recommend that you seek dating and premarital counselling to make sure you and your partner are compatible. This will help in the long run. At Bonobology, we have a panel of experts that can help you with online relationship counselling. To learn more about this service, click here.

Click here to read an article about gifts you can get for your boyfriend in the early stages of your relationship.

3. Try keeping your emotions in check

At some point in the chase, you might be tempted to give in easily (especially when he is being adorable and convincing). What can you do? With every passing day, you’re getting older. This is where you need to control your emotions. In a few dates, he might have swept you off your feet and taken you to paradise. But wouldn’t it be wiser to know him intimately before committing to a relationship? The wait is always worth it!

Click here to read about how single life vs. dating is so different and how it changes your life.

4. Make him chase you, not ‘use’ you

Women, for all of their wit, can be pretty delusional at times. They think that all men want sex (seriously?). And if they give him what he wants, he’ll go mad for them. Wrong. If you’ve studied male psychology, then you should know – men go after women who can offer them more than just her body. They are looking for warmth, comfort, security and companionship much like women are. However, sexual compatibility is important too so make sure you enjoy the act as much as him.

Click here to read about ways you can spice up your sex life.

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Related reading: 8 ways to know whether he loves you or is into it just for sex

5. Stop chasing him

Somewhere between having a romantic dinner to having a late-night talk, you have started chasing him. You’re the one who is constantly texting and wanting to know about him. You nudge him for the meeting. You push him to think – What about the woman I thought was happy in her life? You become attainable, and they drop the chase.

Click here to access the rulebook of texting. This will give you important tips on how to stay in touch without seeming desperate.

6. Always keep some sense of mystery

As much as you love the stories about each other, it’s still good to hold some information back. Men love solving women who seem like a mystery to them. That’s when they get the thrill of chasing. Don’t be a journal; be a mystery.

7. Make him pine for you

Where’s the fun in courtship if you don’t make your man long for you? Try putting some space. Hold back on the meetings and text messaging. Tell him you’re busy or out of town. Going Miss Invisible on him is a good old trick to check if he’s missing you or not.

Click here to read an article about what men want from women.

8. Make him feel you care too

He is doing all the talking while you’re too busy with your cell phone. You fail to listen to him. You don’t compliment him. You are insensitive to his feelings. There is a huge possibility that you’re making it a ‘playing hard’ game without any regard for him. Men love the chase as long they see that their efforts are reciprocated. If you want him for good, then ‘show’ it.

9. Treat his eyes

The visual impression is a powerful tool to get inside a man’s mind. Whether you are stunning or average, look-wise, always take care to dress your presentable best. It’s basic dating etiquette. When you look good and smell good, you become irresistible to him. He fantasises about having you around all the time. And it’s quite natural that he will be on his toes to meet you in every subsequent date.

10. Throw in a bit of competition

At the core of a man’s instinct is game. He can sniff it out in a heartbeat. Drop hints that he isn’t the only one chasing you. A little bit of healthy competition will level up the challenge for him. If he cares, he will up his game to win you.

Click here to read an article about a couple who started wife-swapping and learn more about the swinging lifestyle.

11. Try flirting

We know who the pursuer is and who is pursued. But a little flirting will ensure that your man is interested. Your flirtation will only spice up the game.

lady flirting with a man

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Related reading: Definite signs that your man is in love with you

12. Give him space

It’s very crucial to know how to maintain the exact amount of space in the initial stages of wooing a man. Make sure you lead separate lives while dating each other. Keep your texts short and sexy. Talk with him, but avoid being clingy.

13. Seduce him subtly

After a few dates, he must have complimented you on some aspect of your beauty. Accentuate it, and use it as a weapon to seduce him. For example, if he likes you, the colour red, then pick the most tantalising red outfits and watch him lust over you.

Click here to read about 18 tips you can use to seduce your man and drive him crazy.

14. Boost him and encourage him

There might come the point where he might start having self-doubts or lose confidence. He might be going through a tough time in life as well. Try being there for him, and lift him. He will appreciate the shoulder and come to admire you.

15. Don’t be afraid to walkout

Love and relationship aside, always put your self-respect and worth first. If you see that he is not that into you and is playing you around, walk out on him. You deserve better.

So, we hope that these little tricks and tips will help you find your mystery man someday. Just a small piece of advice – don’t make him chase for long!

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