How Cheaters Hide Their Tracks – 15 Eye-Opening Signs

how cheaters hide their tracks
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If you are here looking for ways on how cheaters hide their tracks, then there could be only two possible reasons for that. You are either cheating on someone and want to know how to get away with it or you are on the receiving end of it and looking for an answer to: how do you catch someone cheating? Whatever the reason is, you will find your answers here. 

But before that, what is cheating? It’s when one person in a relationship violates the other person’s trust by indulging in deceitful actions. If you are feeling suspicious of your partner’s behavior, now is the right time to find out if they’re having a discreet affair. 

To know more about how cheaters hide their tracks and the things cheaters say to hide affairs, we reached out to psychologist Jayant Sundaresan. He says, “You know, the thing about cheating is that everybody is tempted to cheat at least once in their lives. However, most people don’t give in to their temptations and hold their morals as shields against such temptations. Those who cheat will do it for the adrenaline rush and for the thrill they get from it. Once they indulge in such crooked ways, they will forever live in the fear of getting caught.”

How Cheaters Hide Their Tracks — 15 Eye-Opening Signs

Is it possible to maintain secret cheating for a long time or forever? Jayant answers, “No. Definitely not. However, cheating is a complex topic because we first need to navigate if the cheater has indulged in it only once or is it a repeated behavior. If it’s the latter, then the cheater by now must have mastered the art of pulling the wool over your eyes. What goes in the mind of a cheating man or woman is not ordinary. A cheater’s mind is quite erratic. They do many things in order to avoid getting caught. Furthermore, a frequent cheater has successfully found a way to lead a second life without the knowledge of their spouse.”

Technology plays a very important role in everyone’s lives. It also plays a crucial part in secret cheating. It’s not just about how uber-protective secret cheater are about their phone and how they wouldn’t let anyone sneak a peek at their screen. It’s about how they hide their perfidies and lie to you with a straight face. Moreover, they create fake accounts and hide behind them to hunt more affairs. And yes, they may also have a burner phone or other devices they use to communicate secretly. Let’s talk about how cheaters hide their tracks in fifteen different ways.

How Cheaters Hide Their Tracks
How Cheaters Hide Their Tracks

Related Reading: 18 Definite Signs He Loves The Other Woman

1. They control information

Jayant says, “The first answer to your question of how cheaters hide their tracks is by withholding the information. Cheaters do quite a few things to hide their two-timing. They carefully and cleverly control the information they share with their significant other. There are many warning traits of a serial cheater. The first information they control is how their time was spent – an experienced cheater can always account for their missing minutes in front of their partner. The second information they always control is the explanation of money expenditure.

“The reason that these two pieces of information are always controlled by the cheater is because you need time and money for another relationship. You need to meet them and you can’t meet them at home. You have to spend money to go somewhere else. How many cheaters do you know who want to have an emotional connection with the person they are cheating with? Not too many, I am sure. They need time and money to spend on a hotel room because the primary reason for cheating is attraction and lust.”

What to do if your partner is guilty of this

It can be distressing if your partner withholds information due to the emotional turmoil. In that case:

  • Openly communicate what you are feeling and how it is impacting you
  • Set boundaries on what you are willing to accept and not
  • Focus on self-care for your mental, physical, and emotional health
  • Get professional help if all efforts at communication fail

2. On the flip side, they overshare 

Jayant adds, “Contrary to the previous point, one of the answers to how cheaters hide their tracks is by oversharing. This is a psychological tactic used by the cheater where they don’t hide (almost) anything. They will share everything that happened throughout the day but they will tweak a few facts here and there. They are very careful about letting you know the minute-by-minute detail of an office trip.

“The reason that some cheaters resort to this method is because when you withhold all the information, the partner will definitely get suspicious. In order to prevent the feeling of insecurity in the relationship, they go on and on about the details and activities of the day very meticulously.”

What to do if your partner is guilty of this

Your partner is oversharing so that they manipulate you into focusing on what is unimportant. Turn the tables on them by doing the following.  

  • Keep your cool and remain grounded. Acting impulsively will only be playing into their hands
  • Set boundaries, especially about what you are willing to listen to
  • Focus on the facts and find a way of addressing the underlying issue

3. A cheater creates new passwords 

Jayant says, “If you want to know how do you catch someone cheating, then pay attention to how they use their mobile phones. If all their devices are password-protected and you don’t know any of the passwords, then you have a lot to worry about. If you are wondering, “Where do cheaters hide things about their affair(s)?”, the answer is in their mobile phones. Some will even have a second phone and sim card. That’s where they store photos, dating apps, and engage in group chats with like-minded friends.

“When you ask them for the password to do something mundane like ordering food, they will create a scene by accusing you of invading their privacy. If they don’t have anything to hide, then what are they trying to protect? One of the other cell phone cheating signs is if they have another phone. They often use a separate device or SIM for discreet affairs.”

What to do if your partner is guilty of this 

New passwords can bring up feelings of mistrust due to the lack of transparency. So:

  • Communicate your concerns and seek clarity about why this is happening
  • Focus on establishing why transparency is important to you
  • Seek professional help to deal with communication issues and support you in rebuilding trust 

Related Reading: Finding Someone Special After Marriage In A Friendship

4. They use Second Space

Where do cheaters hide things inside their phones though? Jayant answers, “One of the most popular ways on how cheaters hide their tracks is by using the Second Space feature which is similar to having a folder entirely away from your main phone’s storage. It is a completely different space in the same phone where you can use a different email ID and keep your data protected.

“This is one of the foolproof ways to not get caught as it’s the same handset but one password will open one space, and another password will open a completely different space of the phone. So, you have to create two different fingerprints and passcodes – for your two different lives. The advantage of this Second Space is that neither of the spaces overlaps the other.

“Hence, the cheater’s secret remains a secret unless and until you find out about this Second Space. This feature is rapidly gaining a lot of recognition these days and it’s one of the cell phone cheating signs you must be aware of.” 

What to do if your partner is guilty of this

If your partner is using such apps to hide their infidelity, it shows what great lengths they will go through to stay a step ahead. So:

  • Gather concrete evidence of infidelity before confronting them
  • Openly communicate your concerns expressing the need for trust, transparency/honesty
  • Seek couples counseling if attempts at communication fail 
Healing from Cheating

5. Cheaters use cheating codes 

If you suspect your partner of cheating and don’t want to confront them without solid proof, then it’s time to check their phone. Once you get a hold of your partner’s text messages, then look for codes you’ve never heard of before. There are chances that your partner is using cheating codes and text messages.

There are many cheating codes like DTF which is an acronym for Down To F*ck. Doesn’t matter if he is the sender or receiver of this message. If he has interacted with this person, then he is definitely DTF. One of the cheating codes in text messages which you must know of is The First Coming. It means the first orgasm outside of a committed relationship. You can easily catch your partner if they have used such codes while chatting with another person. 

What to do if your partner is guilty of this

Cheating codes provide a clever way to have conversations with the affair partner without you catching on. So here’s what you need to do.

  • Find out the context because it may not be indicative of infidelity. Some people use cheat codes in gaming, which is pretty innocent
  • Talk to your partner, clearly expressing your discomfort
  • Seek support from a close family member or professional therapist 

6. Cheaters erase their digital footprints

Jayant adds, “This is yet another common way of how cheaters hide their tracks. They tend to eliminate their digital footprints when they are having a discreet affair. They won’t delete their entire browsing history. That would look very shifty. The moment your browsing history is blank, you will be suspected of sanitizing it. Instead of deleting the entire history, they delete the items which can be held against them. They will make it appear normal by selectively deleting the tabs.

“Another thing you need to know about cheating is that it’s a game of hide-and-seek. Your partner is trying to hide their sexual liaison so that you don’t catch them red-handed. They will keep their notifications silent and they will never let you read their messages.”

What to do if your partner is guilty of this

Cheaters will erase their digital footprints for obvious reasons which is to avoid detection. These include search history, dating sites, etc. In this case:-

  • Evaluate your concerns and why it is affecting you so much. Could it be that you have seen other signs of infidelity?
  • Talk to your partner openly and allow them to explain themselves
  • Practice self-care and avoid the temptation to obsess about their digital activities
  • Seek professional help or lean on your support system to help overcome the challenges you are facing

On moving on, a Reddit user says “Moving on is a process where you focus on yourself and your wellbeing, not of your ex partner’s. Join therapy if you’re not already there, journal to fight triggers and bad days, make new friends to help you not feel alone, treat yourself so you know you’re worth it, read books to know that you’re not the only one facing this. Infidelity runs deeper than they cheated because they can and want to. Find yourself.”

Related Reading: Are You Unknowingly Flirting? How To Know?

7. Cheaters hide their tracks by manipulation 

One of the ways cheaters hide their tracks is by manipulating their partners. Jayant says, “Cheaters are master manipulators. There are many things cheaters say to hide affairs. It’s one of their manipulation antics. They will always accuse the other person of cheating when they know very well that they are loyal. They will distract the topic in hand by accusing the other person. 

“They will twist the entire narrative. When they are confronted, they will resort to the usual things cheaters say to hide affairs. One of the main phrases is “It’s not what it looks like” or “That person is just a good friend” or “It won’t happen again”. And the most crushing one – “It was just sex.” Sex can never be just sex, and it’s a big deal for most of us.”

What to do if your partner is guilty of this

Cheaters play mind games and will gaslight you with the things they do and say. So:

  • Learn to identify signs of manipulation
  • Call them out by clearly expressing that you see what they are doing
  • Get professional help through couples counseling if all else fails
on cheating

8. They create a pattern

Jayant says, “If you want to know how cheaters hide their tracks, then you need to find out the patterns they have created. Most of the cheaters live a double life. They create a schedule or a pattern which they religiously follow. This is one of the biggest warning signs of a toxic relationship. For example, let’s say the cheater’s work is till 5:30 pm. They will pretend like their work gets wrapped up by 7:30 pm. They do this so they can have the two hours all by themselves without their spouse questioning them and asking them to account for the missing hours.

“No matter where they go, they will always pay cash. Restaurants, hotel bills, and gifts will always be paid in cash because cash can’t be traced. They will buy the same gifts for their partner and for the person they are cheating with, for the sake of convenience. In a scenario where the cheater has multiple affairs and wants to hide their sexual partners from each other, they will never call those people by their names. They will make use of darling, honey, baby, and all the other terms of endearment you can think of. They do this very carefully in order to avoid saying the wrong name.”

What to do if your partner is guilty of this

A change in pattern can be distressing especially if you think there is cheating involved. So:

  • Voice your concerns and allow them to explain themselves
  • Lean on your support network and prioritize self-care
  • Seek individual therapy to allow you to find yourself once again
Is My Partner Cheating On Me?

9. They won’t get naked in front of their SO 

Jayant says, “This one is pretty obvious, isn’t it? This is how cheaters hide their tracks because they will be afraid that the marks on their body will give the game away. They will never undress or get dressed in their partner’s presence. They will never shower together as well because the hickeys will get them caught. If you want to know how most affairs are discovered, then love bites is your answer.

“If it isn’t the partner who gave them all the love bites, then they are definitely getting the bites from somewhere else. Cheaters even go to the extent of having a separate condom pack. They are so smart about it that they don’t want the missing condom packets to disclose the affair.”

Jayant further adds, “To conclude your ‘can cheaters hide their cheating forever’ question, the answer is no. It doesn’t matter if it was a one-off thing or a regular affair. They will get caught and to your surprise, they do feel guilty about cheating. What’s more is that cheating as a repeated behavior is like an addiction. The excitement of meeting someone new. The thrill of hiding this information from your partner. The secret meetings. The passionate sex. It pumps their blood. Once the novelty fades, they will begin their hunting again. The repeat offenders will never settle. They will cheat again and again.”

What to do if your partner is guilty of this

This is a huge red flag that shows the cheater has lost any modicum of respect for you. So:-

  • Try communicating your feelings and concerns openly
  • Contact a lawyer to start divorce proceedings if they don’t change their ways
  • Get professional help from a therapist to navigate through the process

Related Reading: 10 things only single people will relate to!

10. Changes in social circles are a sign of secret cheating

You want to know the answer to how do you catch someone cheating? Well, look at the company he is keeping. Have you noticed that your partner no longer hangs around his old friends or family members? He seems to have new friends. That could be a sign of secret cheating. The new friends may not know that you exist, thus allowing your partner to cheat in peace.

What to do if your partner is guilty of this

Please note, a new social circle is not concrete evidence of cheating. It could be due to some innocuous reasons like changing interests, personal growth, etc. So:

  • Gauge their willingness to introduce you to their new friends. If they are not, it could be a sign of infidelity
  • Convery any misgivings you may have
  • Seek professional intervention to help rebuild trust

11. Disappearing messages are cell phone cheating signs

One of the simplest responses to how do you catch someone cheating is to look at text messages. Well, in this digital era, secret cheating is so much easier with disappearing messages. Social media platforms have this feature. The same applies to WhatsApp, Telegram, and Signal.

What to do if your partner is guilty of this

Its hard to catch the cheating partner in the act with disappearing messages. But if you know for sure they are, you can do the following.

  • The first step is to seek clarity by asking why
  • Voice your concerns that this is impacting the trust in the relationship
  • Seek couples counseling to help reach a middle ground
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12. Social media deception

Cheaters will go to great lengths to hide their tracks. The obvious reasons are not to get caught red-handed of course. They manipulate social media platforms to hide their activities. Their profiles, contact names, relationship status, etc. are usually fake thus a social media red flag you should not ignore. But once again, social media deception is not concrete evidence of cheating. Some people just like the anonymity the platforms give them.

What to do if your partner is guilty of this

If your partner is being sketchy on social media:

  • The first step is to find out why this is so
  • Let them know it impacts the trust you have in hem
  • Seek couples counseling to help rebuild trust

Related Reading: The Social Media Cheating Connection – Real Risk or Hype?

13. iPhone has tons of ways to hide cheating

Wondering how to hide cheating on iPhone? Well, this nifty gadget has tons of ways including the following cell phone cheating signs.

  • Constant changing of the passcode protection
  • Deleted call logs or text messages
  • Messaging apps that look like games
  • Installed private messaging apps with the disappearing messages feature
  • Disabled message previews to keep away prying eyes
  • Turned off location-sharing or notifications are a major red flag, etc.

Adept cheaters go to great lengths to learn how to hide cheating on iPhone. Not that Android users are any better. So, you must be extra vigilant to catch any suspicious activity. 

A Reddit user shares “Cell phone statements: We never opened each other’s mail, but something was bugging me so I waited until the next phone bill came in and grabbed it before he knew it was there. There was this number that he called and called him multiple times a day (like 10 times a day even on weekends no joke); so I picked up the phone and called it. Got her voicemail and found out her name. Bingo, it was a co-worker.”

What to do if your partner is guilty of this

You now know how to hide cheating on iPhone. So, take the following steps.

  • eek honesty about their cellphone activities
  • Listen in a calm manner, asses your feelings, and then evaluate the relationship
  • Consider counseling if the relationship is worth saving

14. Cheaters use location spoofing

Once again thanks to technology cheaters are always ahead with location spoofing. These apps track location using GPS so it’s easy to use location spoofing to falsify location data. What it means is the cheater can claim to be in one location when they are not. 

What to do if your partner is guilty of this

If you know your partner is using location spoofing to hide when they go see someone else:-

  • Ask them why before concluding it is a case of infidelity
  • Communicate your need for transparency
  • If the trust is broken, seek couples counseling or individual therapy

15. Lack of future plans

An affair partner will not make any future plans with you. Neither are they vested in making any long-term relationship goals. Any attempts at such discussions never yield any results. 

What to do if your partner is guilty of this

What is a relationship that does not have longevity in mind. Discussing and planning for the future should be a priority in a health relationship. If this is not happening:

  • Communicate your concerns and see if there’s hope for the two of you
  • Seek couples counseling to work on the underlying issues
  • If all else fails, consider initiating divorce proceedings or leave the relationship if not married 

Now that you’ve found out how cheaters hide their tracks, the important question is, would you still be with them despite all the lies and betrayal? Because at the end of the day, you deserve a love that is all yours. If your partner’s disloyalty is affecting your mental health, Bonobology’s panel of experienced therapists can help you figure out how to manage better. 

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