Trying to find tips to impress a mother-in-law? You’re in luck. Meeting your boyfriend’s mom for the first time can send chills down your spine. The reason it is so anxiety-inducing is that it can be a deciding factor for your relationship too! Before you meet her, you are obviously pondering how to impress the parents of your boyfriend so that she loves you the same way that her son does.
If soap opera tropes have taught us anything, it is that mothers-in-law can be vicious when it comes to picking and scrutinizing a partner for their son. And while it is understandable that every woman wants the best for her child, we have also demonized mothers-in-law for far too long. While it can be nerve-wracking to meet her for the first time, how to impress a mother-in-law is a walk in the park if you do certain things right.
8 Ways To Impress A Future Mother-In-Law
When I met my mother-in-law to be for the first time, I was very scared and at the same time excited to meet her. I knew it would be a beautiful experience to meet her and this confidence came from my then-boyfriend, now my fiancé. He told me all about her and how she was a brilliant and hardworking woman who struck the perfect work-life balance to provide for her family and also nurture them. He told me very inspiring things about her which is why I was really looking forward to seeing her.
We also had several things in common. To begin with, both of us loved the color white. What’s adorable is, that both of us were wearing white that day too! But to be fair and honest, despite our similarities, we had to go through a long adjustment period, and we are still evolving even today. This really taught me that how to impress a future mother-in-law is no joke.
Remember that your first time with a mother-in-law can set the tone of your relationship with her and her attitude towards you. Read on for 5 ways to impress a mother-in-law to strike a great relationship with the woman who raised the man you love.
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1. Dress up nicely
By dressing up, I don’t mean getting dolled up like a Barbie. What I mean is to make a conscious effort to look good and be presentable. Most of us judge people by their outer appearance at first. You may have a golden heart, but if you wear shabby clothes, your heart may get lost in that shabbiness. Take out your fab dresses and shoes if you are serious about impressing your mother-in-law.
Also, clean clothes imply that you are a clean and hygienic person. When it comes to your future in-laws, you want to make the best first impression. And there’s nothing that puts forth a strong impression as much as your appearance. Make sure your nails are trimmed and tidy, your hair is nicely done, and wear a bright smile. You will win her heart in an instant! Let’s not deny that all mothers want a charmer for their son.
2. Don’t brag to future in-laws
A lot of girls tend to show off their achievements intentionally or unintentionally. Don’t go in there with all guns blazing, rambling about everything from your school medals to your promotion at your current job. While these can be important conversations, there is a time and place for them. To have a good relationship with a mother-in-law, you have to show her who you really are.
If you are really wondering how to impress a future mother-in-law, do not try too hard. Be simple, elegant and honest in your approach. Remember, she wants a daughter-in-law and not necessarily a valedictorian for her son. All the skills you have will eventually come out over time. Her son must have already told her all those nice things about you. So don’t put in an extra effort to try and prove yourself to your future in-laws, you might come across as haughty and arrogant.
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3. Give her a gift
To start off the relationship with your mother-in-law on the right foot, consider buying her a present. You are meeting her for the first time and also trying to make her like you. Then why not give her something that she loves to show her you care? I knew my mother-in-law loves flowers, so I bought her a bouquet when I met her for the first time. If you want to know how to deal with a father-in-law, one of the simplest starting points is giving them a gift too.
There is no need for a lavish gift since it will seem as if you are trying too hard and they will see right through that. Just show her a little appreciation and make her feel that you are glad to meet her. Trust us, she will definitely feel appreciated and give you extra brownie points for the same. It can be a silk robe to add some luxury to her wardrobe or a bouquet to bring some light and cheer into the living room.
4. Don’t talk about your love story
Every mother-in-law has a feeling that you may snatch her son away from her. So do not talk about anything that makes her feel uncomfortable. She does not need to know where you guys met, who spoke first or how you met in too much detail. The last thing you need on your hands is a jealous mother-in-law. You really don’t want to try and sabotage your plans to impress a mother-in-law by making her jealous at the first go.
There are chances that you guys met on Tinder, just for a hook-up, and later got serious about each other. But does she really need to know all the details of your sizzling, hot romance? Nope. How to impress a future mother-in-law is about keeping her happy at all times. So go by the book and do what will please her the most.
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5. Find a common hobby
To bond with your mother-in-law, consider finding something that you can both share and spend time on. For example, shopping! If your mother-in-law is fond of the same, take her out to the nearest mall and spend some one-on-one time with her. This will make her feel like you are serious about your relationship with her. Because, at the end of the day, to impress a mother-in-law, you also want to show her that you care for her and are willing to make some efforts to build a relationship between you two.
You can ask her to teach you a thing or two about home maintenance, marriage problems that couples usually face, or any other skills that she is good at. To really find common ground, you have to focus on doing things with her that can help you understand her better. Once you get a hang of what she loves doing, you can proceed to spend some time doing it with her and building a shared camaraderie.
6. Treat your partner with respect
Treating your partner with respect and as an equal is one of the easiest answers to how to impress the parents of your boyfriend. By treating him with dignity, you show that there’s mutual respect and admiration between you two. At the end of the day, all that parents want is someone who can treat their son with love and care. By doing so in front of them without making a show of it, you display that their son is in good hands.
If you want to impress a mother-in-law, one of the most direct methods is to convince her of your love and care for their son. By doing so, you assure her that your partner is in good hands and she need not worry at all. Through little gestures that reflect a mutual camaraderie between you and your partner, you can be surefooted in your relation with a mother-in-law.
7. Make a personal connection
This point is true also when you’re trying to understand how to deal with the father-in-law. By making an individual connection with them, you ensure that there’s a shared camaraderie and respect that’s completely separate from your equation with their son. It’s the easiest and quickest way to impress your in-laws. If you’re wondering, “What I say to my mother-in-law?”, just be yourself and try to set up an authentic connection with them.
You can also ask your boyfriend questions, such as how to impress your mom, in advance. This will help you gauge their personalities and present your best self accordingly. You can go on a movie night or an outdoor picnic with them which will further cement your bond. When you create a relationship with your in-laws that’s independent and self-sustaining, you also create a more a meaningful impact on your partner and his parents’ lives.
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8. Get to know her well
When it comes to your relationship with a mother-in-law, she should feel valued and cherished in the relationship that she shares with you. If that so happens, you can be sure of the fact that she’ll approve of you without blinking an eye. One of the easiest ways to do so, especially if you’re wondering, “What to say to my mother-in-law to make her feel valued?”, is to ask for her advice. By asking for her advice, you send the message that you care for her opinions. You can also give her some thoughtful gifts to make her feel appreciated.
This makes her feel valued and respected. By also remembering the stories she recounts and the facts that she tells, you can bring them up in a later conversation. This shows that you give weight to her words and give attention to them which further increases her love for you. You can also ask your boyfriend about how to impress your mom and prepare to make communication with her accordingly. You can use the stories he might have told about her to show her that you two think of her and speak of her fondly. This can further impress a mother-in-law.
Clearly, how to impress your future mother-in-law is not an impossible feat. All you really have to do is reassure her that you can make her son happy and she will eventually love you. It’s also necessary, at the same time, to set boundaries with in-laws so as to create a healthy relationship. Moreover, even before you meet her, your boyfriend would have already given you a heads-up about her likes and dislikes. So you will be ready enough. Take a chill pill be yourself, and win her over with all that love!
Find something that you both like. Spend quality time with her to get to know her interests and hobbies and share the same. Whether it is shopping, asking her to teach you a new pasta recipe, or even just gardening — show her that you are willing to spend time with her.
Be the person she wants for her son. A mother-in-law needs to feel secure that the woman in her son’s life loves him and will make him better. When she sees that in you, she will have no reason to dislike you.
By loving her son and respecting her immensely. All a mother-in-law wants to feel is loved, cherished and respected, and happy for her son. Just prove that you are the right woman for the job and you will have won her heart.