Subtlety is an art few have mastered. Most men, when picking up a date, go for obvious methods of approach. A strong pickup line, or the usual “Can I have your number?” Standing out amidst this mad scramble of gents is a tough task. But here are 7 techniques of stealth attraction that will guarantee success without you needing to do much show-and-tell.
There is a particular crowd of men who simply want to ‘get some’ without being involved in a serious relationship. But impressing random women every other day might make you go through the playbook from cover to cover, and it may still not work out. If you are one of those men who just hit failure three nights in a row, the stealth attraction program is tailored for you. Before you seriously start questioning your presence in the eyes of a woman, you should try to incorporate the stealth attraction methods into your dating game.
With just a little well-thought-out effort from your end, you can be a hit at clubs and bars. Because hitting it off with the ladies isn’t as hard as you’ve been made to believe. But hey, what is stealth attraction exactly? And does stealth attraction really work? And how to use stealth attraction to your advantage? Starting from stealth attraction meaning to stealth attraction arousal triggers, we’re here to answer all of those questions swarming about in your mind right now by spilling the beans on the stealth attraction secret.
What Is Meant By Stealth Attraction?
This brilliant and sexy term is something Richard La Ruina (aka Gambler) came up with when he taught a course on approaching women for hookups, and casual dating rules. La Ruina, sneaky (and sometimes, problematic) as ever, focused on women’s unconscious minds. He wanted to target the things that women found attractive but were unaware of. So, simply put, the stealth attraction secret is all about figuring out the things that subconsciously attract a woman to a man.
While overt (direct) approaches are the norm of the day, stealth attraction uses covert (secret) methods to woo a woman. His theory had five components – stealth value, stealth opening, stealth seduction, stealth arousal, and stealth extraction. Hmmm, sounds like a military mission, right?
La Ruina claimed that stealth attraction was rejection-proof. And a lot of other studies do suggest that unconscious forces play a significant role in sexual attraction. From our expressions to our body language, anything can catch a potential partner’s eye. Basically, it tells you all you need to know about when to say “I love you” and never get turned down. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves, we’ve got a lot of ground to cover before you get to the point of saying those three words and hearing them back.
The first order of business is to understand how does stealth attraction work really. That’s what we were here to do – to give you some clarity on stealth attraction meaning. Intrigued by the theory of stealth attraction, I delved deeper into what works when you’re trying to make it click with someone. After speaking to our experts, and a LOT of research, I curated this list of stealth attraction techniques. These, when coupled with the right stealth attraction secret words, are going to make sure your dating game never flatlines.
Using La Ruina as a starting point, I’ve constructed a brand-new answer to “How do you trigger a woman’s attraction?” Given below are the 7 secrets of stealth attraction. Ready? Set…Go!
Related Reading: 18 Simple Tricks To Get A Girl’s Attention
7 Techniques Of Stealth Attraction That You Can Use
As we’ve established, stealth attraction is super sneaky, and hence, not always ethical. So be careful about its use and as a woman, know when you’re being played. It works its way into a woman’s mind and gets her to think, “Hey, who IS that guy?” Now, the stealth attraction program was initially created to make an impression on one-night stands or casual hookups. But these tips given below can be used for any dating scenario.
Here’s an unfortunate but practical fact about the stealth attraction tricks – shy or generally anxious people may not enjoy its benefits to the fullest. Stealth attraction methods are not supposed to give you wholesome personality grooming training and doesn’t help support your unique mental health aspects. So, before you go ahead and purchase the stealth attraction program online, remember it can’t break in and bring you out of your shell. But if you only struggle with approach anxiety and stutter to say a simple “Hi” to a gorgeous woman, good days are coming for you with this program.
You might be a conversational wizard and yet something can come in your way of impressing the ladies instantly. Superficial as it may sound, a decent appearance would be an added bonus to find some success through these techniques. I mean, think about it, you are competing with at least four to five other men at a bar to catch the attention of a particular woman. No matter how many quotes we read about inner beauty, in all probability, she would take an interest in the decently groomed and clothed man instead of a guy in sloppy clothes and messy hair.
But we are here to share some good news with everyone. While good looks play a key role in attraction, this list is broader in its perspective. It’s unreasonable to expect washboard abs from all men – ridiculous beauty standards go both ways. No matter what kind of a guy you are or what your background is, this selection of stealth attraction techniques can come in handy.
Just grab the essence of each technique, and you can use it anywhere. For all the dear men reading this, stop worrying – it isn’t rocket science! So let’s start exploring these stealth attraction techniques, ethically.
1. A step here, and a step there
When I’m approached by a complete stranger at a café or club, I’m usually a little flustered. Because I’m in the middle of something, and a man magically appears, asking if I’d like a drink. I either have to come up with an excuse instantly, or I go all “ummm hmmm hmmm”.
A marvelous stealth attraction technique is avoiding this super direct approach. If you’ve got your eyes on a girl in a public space, make eye contact, smile a little, and walk by her. If she’s at the counter placing an order, walk over and get in line. Make a one-line conversation about something generic.
Give it a solid 15-25 minutes so she’s well aware of your presence (and maybe even your intentions). If she decides she’s not interested, she won’t reciprocate your little gestures. You’ll get an idea of whether she’s inclined toward you or not. This is a smart way of asking for her number because it will give her some time to think (unconsciously).
At the very least, you won’t take her by complete surprise. She’ll spare more than one thought when she’s considering your offer. The psychology behind this is ‘priming’. According to this theory, the first stimulus affects the response of a person to the second stimulus.
You’ll have ‘primed’ the girl before approaching her and the exposure to your presence will influence her decision. Real smooth, right? I’m sure you’re no longer wondering, “Does stealth attraction really work?” After all, when you’ve got such a suave move up your sleeve, you know it’s got to work. Maybe try this priming technique before making your move the next time, and you’ll see how effectively this stealth attraction technique can trigger a woman’s attraction.
2. All talk and no play makes Jack a dull boy
If you could just let your body do the talking. Most men yap away without realizing that silence is so much louder. Women are not interested in your overused pickup line, Jason. Let’s get this straight once and for all; body language plays a very, very important part in attraction. Body language and facial expressions are means of non-verbal communication.
Sure, stealth seduction words have their own charm but only when used the right way, with the right intent, with sincerity, and at the right time. Before that, you need to lay the groundwork and develop the attraction you feel toward the woman you have your eyes set on, and sense her feeling it too. You’ll get an edge if you use these tips on other kinds of communication.
Let me put it this way, there are certain physical cues that appeal to our minds when we observe an individual. Hence, body language is one of the 7 secrets of stealth attraction. For example, a man who can hold a woman’s gaze is hot. Don’t be in a rush to hook up. Enjoy the slow build-up of intense chemistry from a slight distance and notice the stealth arousal triggers get fired up! When played along with the stealth attraction secret words list, this move will only make her want you more.
You need to keep two things in mind about non-verbal communication. Firstly, relax. No really, take a chill pill. Tense muscles, clenched jaw, or folded arms are really uncomfortable to look at. Keep your body language ‘open’ (no, this does not mean man-spread). Face the person you’re talking to, and don’t lean back or slouch.
Secondly, say cheese. Your expressions are a solid basis for what people think of you. You have to look approachable if you want to be likable. Let the sun shine from within, and put a warm/seductive/naughty smile on your face.
Related Reading: How To Ask A Girl Out On A Date – 18 Tips To Make Her Say Yes
3. Never go in for the swoop
Sounds counter-intuitive, I know. But it’s also the key to how to use stealth attraction correctly. A very important part of stealth attraction is ‘micro-escalation’. When you go in for the swoop at the end of a date, you run the risk of taking her consent for granted. Take your time, don’t rush.
I present a hypothetical situation. Your date has just ended and you’re in a car with her. A conversation is ongoing, and you think the time has come to move in for a kiss. How do you go ahead? How do you trigger her attraction? This is exactly where the stealth attraction secret words list comes into action.
Pay her a genuine compliment first. Let your eyes skim her face (FACE ONLY), then her lips. Then, hold her gaze and tell her you’d like to kiss her. That’s right – tell her (the stealth seduction words could be as simple as vocalizing your thoughts and desires). If you get the green signal, go ahead. This gentle flow into the kiss is so much better than a quick, sudden, and possibly non-consensual lean-in.
An online campaign recently came up with the slogan, “Consent is sexy!” Consent implies respect for your partner/date, shows you have dignity and integrity, and makes sure that your date doesn’t feel unsafe with you. Not only does it make the communication clearer, but also makes your sexual experience safer and more comfortable. Consent in dating is very important, and in this way, asking for consent becomes your stealth attraction words.
Here’s a pro tip to make sure she doesn’t end up throwing you out of the car in the middle of a busy street: Do not neg her. Negging is a pickup term that suggests passing a rather insulting comment on the physical aspects of a woman in order to win her over. But the reality is that no self-respecting woman would fall for a dirty comment in the name of compliments. So, if you want to stay with her till dawn, it’s better you steer clear of such tactics.
4. First impressions rule
They may not last, but they certainly do rule. Our very first opinion about people is formulated at lightning speed, something we call a ‘snap judgment’. If we’re being strictly technical, you have one-tenth of a second to make an impression (YES!). Research has shown that in this nano-second, non-verbal communication is your BFF.
Our appearance is also a part of stealth attraction because it is vital to how people perceive us. Our looks matter, and this is exactly why conventionally beautiful people succeed in life. Appearances mean facial symmetry and a good body, but they also mean how we present ourselves.
So does this kind of stealth attraction really work? Absolutely. A study even revealed that something as minute as the cut of a man’s suit can impact how women perceive him on five different parameters! We make inferences on clothing style and facial hair. So, beloved men, it’s time to get a haircut, shave and groom your beard, and dress like a boss. Personal hygiene and a sense of style are ultimate stealth attraction techniques.
If we have learned anything from the master pickup artist of television, Barney Stinson, you know what his two-word advice for you will be – “Suit up!” That, right there, is a major part of the stealth attraction secret decoded for you. Bring out the best in yourself, both in terms of looks and character – confidence, courtesy, and more – to make that favorable first impression. Once you’ve nailed that, it’s half the battle won in your quest to trigger a woman’s attraction.
Related Reading: What Qualities In Men Attract Women The Most?
5. Self-conviction: Am I worth it?
Becca Fitzpatrick wrote, “The problem with human attraction is not knowing if it will be returned.” And to that I say – so true, sis. Who hasn’t been anxious before approaching an individual with our romantic interest? We’ve all felt the clammy forehead and sweaty palms.
Your tentativeness and anxiety can hold you back. You’ve probably heard a zillion times that confidence is attractive, but do you know why? It shows you’re a notch above the others competing for her attention. You don’t have to compete – pfft, you’re a class apart. But before you can convince her, you need to convince yourself.
Work on building your conviction and self-esteem; it’s an essential prerequisite to figuring out how to use stealth attraction to your advantage. She can’t reject you if you stop rejecting yourself. My friend, Carl, struggled with approaching women for a very long time. Even when he managed to walk up to them, he’d chicken out or stammer away.
But he decided to work on this problem using self-affirmations. He stopped comparing himself to others, which took so much of the pressure off. I could actually see him evolve into a more self-assured individual. He’s going steady with a woman now. If you want to get a girl to like you, work on becoming a self-assured individual.
Confidence is one of the 7 secrets of stealth attraction because it implies less emotional baggage and more self-sufficiency. So when you ask me, how do you trigger a woman’s attraction? I say, by knowing that you can.
6. Be a mystery man
Oversharing will be the bane of potential matches. Please stop narrating your life stories to someone you just met. Listen more than you talk, and when you do speak, don’t get all philosophical. Women like enigmatic men who have an aura of mystery about them. That’s the crux of stealth attraction secret words.
Spark someone’s intrigue, and you have them hooked. Let her think, “I wonder what’s on his mind? Does he like me enough?” Don’t give away how interested you are because you’ll seem desperate. Mystery always intensifies the dynamic two people share; it lends a sexy vibe to the setting. Before you know it, the signs of mutual attraction will get hard to ignore.
Moreover, women want to be around a good listener. You need to be easy to hang out with because being a little mysterious means you aren’t clingy. The silences in verbal communication are filled with non-verbal ones. Glances, touches, smiles, and closeness are all things that heighten sexual tension. Let the chemistry peak without breaking its spell by talking incessantly.
The stealth attraction secret is to not put all your cards on the table all at once. Express your interest by all means, otherwise what’s the point of using stealth attraction to subconsciously attract a woman. But know exactly how far to go. If you stop yourself too soon, your interest may come across as lukewarm. Go too far and you risk coming across as pushy. So, finding the right balance between interest and intrigue is the key. That’s also the answer to “How does stealth attraction work?”
7. Crystal clear intentions
You can avoid the next-morning awkwardness by being clear from the outset. Is it a hookup you’re interested in or something more? Whatever your intentions, be straightforward and honest in conveying them. No woman should feel that she was tricked into sleeping with you.
And a study shows that honest people are perceived to be more attractive by our unconscious. We are literally thought to be more physically attractive if we are honest. Hence, the truths you speak are your stealth attraction words! A woman will think it’s hot when you speak your mind and respect her. Set the terms of the nature of your relationship and become 10x attractive in her eyes.
Here we reach the end of our 7 secrets of stealth attraction. I hope, by now, you have the answer to questions like “Does stealth attraction really work?” or “How to use stealth attraction to woo a girl?”. The key takeaway is – covert > overt, and unconscious > conscious. More body, less talk! Feel free to come back to us for more advice on attraction, dating, relationships, and basically everything.