What are the signs that a married man is falling in love with you? For starters, he would end up giving you all the attention you ever wanted in this world. A married man cares for you if he goes out of his way to be extra pleasant.
He is extremely well-mannered, has the confidence that comes from having proved himself (he probably has a good job or is a successful businessman), and has eyes only for you but in an almost innocent manner. You can instantly read the signs a married man is attracted to you.
We, women, love attention since it becomes so scarce to come by from our husbands. Once you are married, your partner just doesn’t seem so crazy about you anymore. And when you are single and have put in hours to do the hair, make-up and wear that simply gorgeous outfit which makes you look very attractive, you want people to be nice, especially men.
Let’s agree, if you have been married too, you really do not dress up just for your husband, you dress up for other men too. You enjoy his company so much and it seems harmless, you do not worry much about the ring on his finger. “A married man in love with me and wants me to reciprocate,” isn’t the most convenient realization, and so you may remain in denial about his evident feelings toward you.
But as time passes the casual messages become personal and the easy attitude becomes a little demanding. You know now that this is not something casual as you thought it to be, your gut tells you that a married man is falling in love with you. For once, it can feel flattering. But what you will do about it is another matter. And if he is not the only married man interested in you, you may be wondering why do you attract only married men?
You may not want to indulge in an affair with a married man but you would still like to know if what he is feeling for you is genuine or you are imagining it. How you decide to handle this complicated situation depends on you. If a married man likes you, will you be dating him? But find out first if there is chemistry between the two of you.
12 Signs A Married Man Is Falling In Love With You
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A married man might not be comfortable easily expressing his love for you as he is married and might be a little scared of the repercussions. When a married man says I love you, it means that he is 100% sure about his feelings for you and wants you in his life. But it may take him a while to get to the point where he can candidly put his feelings into words.
Those feelings are likely to have taken hold long before he can muster the courage to say them out loud. If you’re grappling with the “is a married man in love with me or am I reading too much into the situation?” dilemma, here are the 12 signs which will help you understand what is going on in his mind and what his true feeling for you are.
The below lines will help you decode his care for you as genuine or he has a hidden motive. Is he considering taking things further with you? How do you know if a married man is genuinely interested in you and not playing around? Well, read on.
1. He compliments you out of the blue
Women love compliments, don’t they? When a married man compliments you for your qualities, looks, dress sense, professional life, etc. especially when you least expect it, then it means that he is interested in you and wants you to know that. These compliments might seem harmless in the beginning, but then gradually the married man will be more direct with his compliments.
To ensure that you get his motive, he will compliment you more often. This is to make you notice him. Especially so because not many men are adept at the art of paying compliments. And if you notice only you are being showered with praises, there has to be something more than just being nice.
These are actually hidden signs that a married man is in love with you. There may come a point when you feel he is also flirting with you, under the disguise of being ‘genuinely nice’.
2. He loves talking to you
A married man who likes you would not leave any opportunity to talk to you. Whether it is the latest movies, the latest gig on politics or some serious topic – he would want to discuss everything with you. You will notice that when he talks to you, he will be cheerful and the tone of his voice will be lively. He will always be trying to initiate conversations over text and in person and will try his hardest to hold your attention when you are around him.
It will feel as though just by talking to you his day has become better. This might seem very simple but this is an absolute sign a married man is attracted to you. Nora, a 28-year-old professional from the publishing industry, says that’s how she figured out that a married coworker had feelings for her.
“A married man in love with me? It seemed implausible at first and kept ignoring the signs of attraction between us until he started making obvious overtures to seek me out and look for excuses to spend more time with me. Eventually, we got into a relationship. When a married man really loves you, his attached status can become insignificant. After all, you can find love in the strangest of places,” she says.
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3. He tries to keep tabs on your love life
One of the signs that a married man loves you is his interest in your personal life, your romantic life in particular. Your relationship status is perhaps his gravest concern and he will want to find out whether you are available or not as he is falling in love with you.
If you already have someone in your life, then he will probably air negative opinions about that someone because he will be jealous for sure. He will keep regular tabs on your love life in an effort to wait for the right time to express his love for you. Perhaps he is trying to gauge the right time to let his feelings be known to you or wants to assess whether you have room for him in your heart and life.
Whatever be the reason, if a married man is in love with you, conversations about your dating experiences and love life will be a central feature in your interactions with him.
Related Reading: 5 Lies Women Tell Themselves When They Are Falling For A Married Man
4. He shares details about his married life or refrains from doing so
When a married man likes you he either discusses way too many details about his married life with you or does not even mention it at all. If he does the former, then it means that he is giving you an indication that he is not happy in his married life. He probably wants you to know that he is available for you.
His being upfront about his marital status could also be among the signs that a married man truly loves you and therefore he doesn’t want to keep you in the dark. He wants to have a relationship with you, but he also wants you to get into one with your eyes open.
On the other end of the spectrum, another tell-tale sign of his interest in you is that he rarely brings his spouse to office parties and get-togethers. Perhaps, the other colleagues too haven’t seen his wife ever. If he avoids sharing any details about his married life, then he is probably overwhelmed with guilt and wants to forget the fact that he is married so that he can be with you.
He likes you and perhaps regrets being married already. However, this lack of transparency is a red flag that should not be ignored. When a married man says he misses you and wants to be with you but doesn’t open up about his marriage, there is a good chance that you will be blindsided by his real intentions. So, tread carefully.
5. He goes out of his way to help you
The fact that a married man has fallen in love with you becomes apparent when he does everything in his power to help you when you are facing a problem. He might be helping you because he is friendly, but if he is always there by your side, then it means he deeply cares about you. He will not even think twice before resolving any of your issues.
Your laptop broke down and he immediately ordered one online. He got it delivered in a day because you had a project going. He even slipped a word of appreciation for your work to the boss because he is pally with him. You don’t have to be a genius to get these simple things!
Going above and beyond to help you out, not once or twice but over and over again is among the obvious signs that a married man loves you.
6. He tries to highlight the similarities between the two of you
He will keep hinting at the fact that you are the type of girl he likes and that you two have a lot in common. If he makes efforts to find what really connects you both, it is clear that a married man is attracted to you.
He will contrast this with the fact that his wife hardly has anything in common with him. Well, berating the wife to make a potential love interest feel special is one of the oldest tricks in the book, used by married men to initiate romantic connections outside their marriage.
If you notice him using these tactics to get your attention, make no mistake he is doing it to create a lasting bond with you because he has feelings for you and wishes to have a future with you.
Not only does he make the effort to know what appeals to you, but he may also even show his interest in the same activity. This way he even has more stuff to talk with you about. Before you succumb, let us tell you that an affair with a married man can be quite a complicated, messy journey.
7. His body language is a huge indicator of his love
Instead of straightforwardly confessing his love for you, a married man will use his body language to express his love. If a married man really loves you, he will get nervous around you, will lean toward you while talking to you, make continuous eye contact with you, will smile at you as if you mean the world to him, and will miss no chance to make physical contact with you as well.
To decode how he truly feels about you, notice how he walks. How much space he takes when he sits around you. He tries to show that he is at the top of the hierarchy. You can know how a married man feels about you by checking his body language signs of attraction! This is how you will know if a married man is falling in love with you.
His fingers will inadvertently brush yours. He will be often seen licking his lips. Perhaps he looks a lot at you. He always dresses up impeccably and often takes your opinion while shopping for clothes and shoes online.
8. He takes out time especially for you
As a married man, his priority should be to give time to his wife and family. However, if he is taking out time especially for you during the weekends and even during the weekdays, then you mean something to him and this is a hidden sign that the married man is in love with you.
He could give up his seminars, conferences abroad or boy time at the bar to be with you. When he does spend time with you, he will try his hardest to make sure that you are comfortable and happy. He even gets down to gardening with you, doing DIY stuff or just relax together with bottles of wine. If you are under the weather, he may get soup for you and run a few of your errands.
Well, he clearly likes you more than you think. “I shared such a close bond with a coworker that everyone in the office referred to me as his work wife. My other friends at the office would say I’m naive to not see the signs that he has feelings for me. Then, one day, I called in sick. So, he traveled halfway across the city, choosing to survive the ordeal of New York traffic in the pouring rain, just to check in on me.
“That’s when I could no longer ignore the reality of a married man in love with me. Since we were such good friends, I asked him if my assessment was right and he confessed his feelings. We discussed it and decided to not act on it because I didn’t want to be the one to wreck his marriage,” says Sophie, a banker.
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9. He tries to stay in touch with you regularly
A married man who cares for you will try to stay in touch with you either through text messages or calls. And he will expect you to reply too. In case you fail to reply to his text messages or forget to call him back, then chances are he will get super hyper about it.
He will constantly try to contact you because he wants to get to know you better and make his presence felt in your life. He wants to know all that you have been doing when you are out of his sight. He finds you irresistible, and he will make it clear in every possible way.
When he is away he sends you flowers, cakes, wine and gifts online, just to tell you he’s missing you. When a married man says he misses you, he is subtly hinting that he wants to be with you. Basically, a married man who likes you will go out of his way just to make his presence felt in your life.
10. He gives top priority to your opinions
Your opinions and thoughts related to marriage, cheating, love and any other topics will mean a lot to him. So, he will give importance to your opinions and wishes and will try to shape himself accordingly.
He will try to be a better boyfriend to you by all means, even if you do not think of him that way. Even when he is in trouble, he will reach out to you for suggestions. By giving importance to your opinions, he is giving you an indication that he is interested in you.
11. He always behaves perfectly when he is around you
He portrays himself as the perfect gentleman when he is around you. He tries to be charming, chivalrous and brightens up the atmosphere by making you laugh. He wishes to impress you by all means.
He does this so that you can see him as an interesting and unique person and not a serious and boring married man. Even his interactions with other people when you are around will be very pleasant because he wants to show his best side to you.
He wants you to believe that he is a bold, empowered, strong man who is highly intelligent, confident, and successful. If he is putting so much effort into showing you his best side, you can count it among the signs that a married man loves you. He has no other reason to go to such great lengths to make an impression on you, that too when his plate is more than full with work and home responsibilities.
12. You have a strong gut feeling about his love
Deep down in your heart, you get the strong gut feeling that the married man is falling in love with you. You can keep fooling yourself by saying that he just cares for you because you are his friend, but the reality is that he likes you and you cannot keep denying it.
However, if you do consider taking the plunge of being in a relationship, do it safely and date a married without getting hurt. A married man can deeply care for you but a relationship with him does bring about complications. You need to know that.
Related Reading: What To Do If You Fall In Love With A Married Man
Signs a married man is fighting his feelings for you
If a married man’s feelings are genuine for you he wouldn’t come chasing you from the word go. He will be fighting his feelings for you because he has a wife, a family to think about. Also if you are single, he wouldn’t really want you to get entangled in a relationship that has no future.
And if you are married, he is thinking of the hurt an affair would cause both the spouses. An affair between two married people can take an ugly turn and hurt many people at once. Looking away when he sees you, not answering your texts, ignoring you in front of others could be signs that a married man is fighting his feelings for you but he loves you secretly.
Only if his feelings become too strong to ignore or suppress is when a married man says I love you. If he genuinely loves you, there is a good chance that he will try everything in his power to keep his feelings hidden. It’s his way of protecting you, himself and his family from the potential hurt this connection can bring for everyone involved.
Perhaps he succeeded in befriending you but now understands how complicated the situation can get. His initial advances may have been replaced by sudden avoidances. While you may feel hurt, it could be a possibility that he is fighting his feelings for you because he knows there is no future. A heart-to-heart conversation can help both of you take a realistic look at your situation and decide accordingly. It is always better to part ways when the damage is minimal.
Why Do Married Men Fall For Other Women?
So why does this happen? These men who are married suddenly feel attracted to women and make efforts to spark their interests? When married men are bogged down with the immense responsibilities of a marriage and are unable to cope, they search for an escape route and end up falling in love with another woman.
They might feel emotionally disconnected from their wives, because of which they look for emotional satisfaction elsewhere. It is usually when the wives fail to acknowledge the efforts of their husbands that the men become helpless when another woman shows them love and affection.
However, there are also some men that just crave attention and just want to satisfy their insatiable lust by getting involved with a second woman. If a married man is falling in love with you, then it is probably because of one of these reasons:
- You might have the qualities that his wife lacks
- You might be making him feel whole again
- You might have reinstated his faith in love
- You might have supported him during his rough phases
- He is bored with the romance bit in his marriage
- He may be looking for a new identity through you
Whatever the reasons, it is important that you know what you want in your love life and whether or not you seriously want to commit to a married person. So think about it carefully. Getting dumped by a married man could be a severe blow to your future and self-respect. So there are some questions you should ask yourself when you are falling for a married man.
You don’t choose who you fall in love with – so reciprocate his feelings if you feel that he is worth the complications. Being in love with a married man has its consequences, all the more if there are signs a married man is falling in love with a married woman.
If it makes you uncomfortable and the whole idea of being in a relationship with a married man makes you cringe, then make it clear to him from the beginning. Just because he is falling in love with you, it does not mean you have to oblige him in any way if you are not interested. Taking a firm stand is essential in such tricky situations.
FAQs
There are many tell-tale signs of attraction that you can easily notice if a man likes you. The same signs apply when a married man likes you. The classic signs include looking at you every now and then, eye contact and going out of the way to help you.
Men or women- everyone craves affection and love. A man who is married can get attracted to another woman and it is simply natural. However, things can get messy if the attraction starts to affect the sanctity of the existing relationship or marriage. Sometimes, this attraction does turn into love – even if it all started with simple flirting fueled by lust. There is a possibility that dissatisfaction from current marriage may make a married man fall in love with another woman.
Have you been trying to ask him what he and you share? Does he avoid the question? Does he hate hanging out with your friends and has never referred to you as his girlfriend? Do you see yourself in his future plans or does his plans with you only involve sex? You can have your answers.
Yep, I’m glad I spoke my boundaries. It made a huge difference, I was getting compliments and he didn’t with anyone else around, and kept touching my arm frequently. Also only rarely answers my texts even though they are professional.
It was difficult, but necessary to speak my boundaries, which has to be done or it would have continued.
Every sign I’ve read here are actually true. A married man who has an extramarital affair mean that something is lacking in his marriage, Men need that emotional, and physical connection. They also want their egos stroked in order to feel like a man. Married or not, a man has needs just as much as a woman. When a married man finds someone who actually listens to what he has to say, laughs at his jokes, or has something in common with this person, it makes him feel good inside. It makes him want to get to know her even better.
My experience with a married man started 12 years ago. I am single, and wasn’t happy with the men that I’ve been casually dating..Until one day I met ‘this man’. He is 16 years older than I. While we were chatting, he had told me that he was married, and that he and his wife hadn’t been intimate with each other for a long time being that she was older than him. I didn’t know what to think, So, we decided to meet. He was a perfect gentleman, he opened the door for me and handed me a dozen long-stemmed roses. I was so impressed. We dined at a nice restaurant, it felt awkward at first but eventually we got a conversation going and one thing led to another He is the only man that treated me with kindness, and respect…from that day forward we decided to see each other. Fast forward 12 years later,.we’re still seeing each other. Our relationship has grown into something more than just sex…we fell in love!
I’m not asking him to leave his wife because that was never an option. The best thing for this relationship is to have a life apart from each other. I have the option to see other people, but I prefer not to. He has been good to me since day one, and I am content with this situation. I really don’t care what people (women) think or say about me. I’m happy and that’s all that matters.
Wives always want to believe that their husbands are madly in love with them just because they are married to them but the truth is, most men are actually more Inlove with their side chics than their wives. Because with their side chics they are their true selves. They are more relaxed and more expressive. If all things were equal many men will leave their wives for their side chics in a heart beat.
I agree with both of you on this one!!
I am involved with a married man, who won’t leave his wife but doesn’t want us to stop being friends. He always helps me out with jobs around the house and garden, listens to my problems and when i am upset. He has lost the feelings he had for me due to my messed up jealousy, but i just don’t see why he still wants me in his life as a close friend? No intimacy either. I am still holding onto hope things will change between us, i know they won’t after a year of us knowing each other. I haven’t stopped dating, but not actively looking, if this makes sense?
Now i am waiting for all the hate towards me.
Please, the only way you can tell a married man loves you is if he leaves his wife for you, makes you the wife and still does everything for you in the article 10 years down the line. If you can be the wife for a decade, bare his children, clean his house, cook his meals, wash his clothes while he is out and about with that same chipper, sweet smile you have now, and he still makes time for you, and treats you like a princess, rgen you know he loves you. Until then, you are the side chick, not hard to keep the side chick happy????????????
Just the opposite. Its easy to keep a wife happy not so easy with the other women.