10 Sad Signs He Just Wants To Sleep With You

Single and Dating | | , Writer, Storyteller & Copywriter
Updated On: November 6, 2023
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According to this study, after casual sex, many women reported loneliness, unhappiness, rejection, and regret. Conversely, men reported greater sexual satisfaction, happiness, self-confidence, and contentment. So, whether you are dating someone or have developed feelings for a guy while having casual sex with him, you need to know about the 10 sad signs he just wants to sleep with you, so you can save yourself some grief later.

Be wary of those who love the thrill of serial dating. It can be daunting to realize that the man you are seeing is using you only for sex. He may have underlying issues he hasn’t dealt with yet. But that doesn’t mean he can treat you like an object. It’s not a problem if you want the same thing as well. But if you are looking for an exclusive relationship, then it’s better to be aware of the signs he wants a no-strings-attached kind of relationship. 

10 Sad Signs He Just Wants To Sleep With You

When asked on Reddit for some signs if a man wants you or your body, a user replied, “The sad truth is that it isn’t always obvious when you’re living it, and constantly questioning someone’s actions makes you feel gross and weird so you try to let things go that you wouldn’t if you were seeing it happen to a friend.” 

The quickest way to determine whether a man wants to be with you for the long term is to figure out whether or not a guy is using you for your body. Usually, a guy will be very upfront about his intentions, but not everyone does that. This is why we have compiled a list containing 10 sad signs he just wants to sleep with you.

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1. He is a night owl

It is one of the most important one out of the 10 sad signs he just wants to sleep with you. Take time to notice when he usually initiates contact with you; is it only during the night? If yes, then it’s one of the signs he is a player and that this guy doesn’t care about you. He only cares about your body.

If he liked you, he would want to be in touch with you at all times. There is no reason for him to only contact you in the dead of night other than sexual fulfillment. Now, he could genuinely be busy throughout the day and only have time to talk to you in the evenings. In that case, pay attention to his tone and the intention of his texts. 

Related Reading: How To Say No To Sex Without Hurting Him?

2. He is reluctant to hang out 

Maybe he always stays in touch with you, but whenever you both make plans to meet out in public, he is quick to cancel the plan, or he suddenly wants to meet you at home. This kind of behavior can point toward his intentions of not wanting to take things further. He definitely only wants you for your body and doesn’t want to do anything to foster any meaningful relationship with you.  

A reddit user shares their heartbreaking experience after realizing that they were being used for sex, “Yep, this has happened to me. I really liked the guy initially after our one and only date, after that he would only ever want me to go to his place. Eventually he just ghosted me…it really hurt at first but I realized years later that all the signs were there, he only wanted me for sex, but being 18 and naive, I honestly thought he was the ‘cool, mature older man’. Glad he disappeared!”

2. He insists his friends are bad

When he deliberately keeps you from meeting his friends, it’s one of many sad signs he only wants you for your body. You need to be careful of this tactic, as this can very easily turn into alienation. It’s one of the signs you are with a manipulative man. The reason he wouldn’t want you around his friends is that he doesn’t want them telling you about the other people he is seeing. His friends might also let slip his intentions for you.

To avoid any such mishap, insist on meeting with his friends and try befriending some of them too. Think of Maddy and Nate’s relationship in the hit HBO series Euphoria. While Maddy wanted to show off Nate to everyone in her immediate social circle, Nate wanted to keep her far away from his friends and family. This is a very manipulative tactic, and recognizing the signs of alienation can prevent you from falling prey to it. 

3. He is VERY protective of his phone

Signs He Just Wants To Sleep With You

This is one of the 10 sad signs he only wants to sleep with you. Phones allow a person to court multiple people at once. If you are someone who wants to foster a monogamous, long-term relationship, you have to make sure that he isn’t texting multiple people. However, if you feel a need to check his phone, then this relationship might not be healthy for you anyway. It’s actually one of the tell-tale signs that he will cheat in the future or he is cheating already.

4. He is reluctant to talk about the future with you

When he is reluctant to talk to you about the future, it is one of the sad signs he only wants you for your body. Now, this could go both ways. Take, for example, the star couple Michael B. Jordan and Lori Harvey. The couple had a very public breakup sometime last year.

Lori Harvey was ten years younger than Michael and wanted to have fun and explore life. They reportedly never talked about future plans. This is a prime example of how not wanting to talk about the future could lead to the breaking down of a relationship. 

Related Reading: What Is Cheaters Karma And Does It Work On Cheaters?

6. When he only wants you on his terms

Ever realized how he never agrees to do things that you want to do? And that both of you always somehow end up doing things that matter only to him? Maybe you want to go out for an outing to a theme park that opened up nearby, but he would much prefer being at home. So you end up staying at home? If this happens one too many times, chances are he is just using you for your body and isn’t interested in taking things into the long term. 

7. When he wants to “go with the flow”

When you first started seeing each other, you might have asked him how he sees this relationship panning out, and he might have told you that he wants to keep the relationship “casual” or to “go with the flow”. This is a pretty good indicator that he wants to use you for your body and isn’t interested in fostering a relationship beyond that.

If he has not explicitly told you whether or not he wants to have a meaningful relationship, try picking up on his non-verbal cues. Does he quickly change the subject when you talk about the relationship, or does he purposefully keep you at arm’s length? These are the signs that he wants no strings attached relationship with you.

8. If he turns everything sexual, then he only wants sex from you 

Not all conversations need to be turned into a sexually charged tirade. If you find yourself always having to bring back the conversation to innocent grounds, then there is a chance that he doesn’t see this relationship beyond the sexual context. It’s one of the signs you mean nothing to him.

A Reddit user shares, “When he only wants sex on his terms, sex will be one of the first and only topics of discussion. He may seem to have a one-track mind and would try to bring up something sexual in most discussions.”

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9. He never calls 

Take an audit of who initiates all the conversations in your relationship. Are you the one who always has to ask him to call you, or can he go for days without being the first one to text or call? If this is the case, then the guy is using you for your body. Do you also find him texting you mostly at night? This is a clear sign that a guy is using you for your body over text. Make sure to keep these midnight texts as far removed from sex as possible. And never give in to the urge to send naughty pictures to him. 

Related Reading: How To Make Him Regret Taking You For Granted

10. He always plans indoor dates 

During the dating period, it’s natural to want to hang out in public spaces. This allows for both of you to get to know each other in a public setting. Planning outdoor dates is also a fun way to see each other and build that initial bond.

But if he is insistent on spending dates inside, then there is a good chance that he only wants to use you for your body. It’s one of the signs you should break up with him for good. It is fine to have a stay-at-home date once in a while, but if this happens on every date, then it is time to either stand up for yourself or dump him. 

Some other signs he is just using you for sex are:

  • When he takes you to places that are really out of the way so he won’t run into anyone he knows
  • A hesitation to discuss his life beyond small talk. Also will not ask you questions beyond that realm
  • Playing hot and cold. Making you wait, not replying to messages, etc. A guy who likes you and wants you will let you know; he’s not going to sit tight and give you time to fall in love with someone else
  • Not being sweet to you. There are just some things that happen in relationships – people are thoughtful, they give you hugs, kiss your forehead, try to make an effort to make you happy and comfortable, and they send you sweet goodnight messages. Not seeing those things is my personal red flag

Key Pointers

  • It’s one of the sad signs he just wants to sleep with you when he is reluctant to spend time with you anywhere outside but is excited to meet you at your place at odd hours
  • It’s a sign he is using you for sex when he is way too protective of his phone and hasn’t mentioned the idea of exclusive dating yet
  • When a guy is using you for your body, he will never introduce you to his family and friends

Everybody moves at a different pace when it comes to physicality in a new relationship. Being physical early on can indicate that this is all he is interested in, but it is by no means proof that he just wants sex from you. Before you jump to any conclusion and ghost this guy, it’s better to communicate with him and find out where he wants to take the relationship. If he avoids this conversation, then you can be sure that he is either not in it for the long run or just wants to have a sexual relationship with you, which are both red flags. 


1. How do you tell if a guy wants a relationship or just a hookup?

Usually, a person will make their intentions of dating known from the very beginning. This saves both parties’ heartache and pain down the line. However, this conversation may not happen organically. Talk about your relationship goals from the very beginning. However, if he isn’t forthcoming with his intentions, then there is a good chance that he just wants you for your body.

2. How do you know if a guy is using you?

Sometimes, a guy would use you for your body, money, or mind space. To avoid being a victim, make sure to be clear about the relationship and what you intend for it from the very beginning. Do you find the guy talking about himself constantly and not asking about how your day went or how you are doing? There is a big chance that he is using you as an emotional dumping ground.

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