Online dating apps and sites have become the go-to method for finding love in our tech-driven world. Anyone who is navigating the maze of this new normal of dating or considering hopping on the bandwagon is bound to wonder how successful is online dating. And more importantly, how to date online successfully?
After all, we have all either heard about or experienced first-hand the horrible experiences surrounding this approach to dating. Then, we see online dating pros and cons being put under the lens and analyzed over and over again. Amidst all this scrutiny, feeling a little jittery about the prospect of finding love in the virtual realm is only natural.
But finding success in pursuit of love online is not a far-fetched reality. All you need is to learn how to maneuver your way through, separate the wheat from the chaff and find a way to stand out in the crowd.
How Successful Is Online Dating?
Before we address the perennial question of how to date online successfully and find the partner of your dreams, it’s worth exploring how successful is online dating as a concept. It’s only wise to be sure about the odds of success before you invest time and effort in a prospect. Getting your facts about online dating right can bring you that sense of clarity.
A comparative analysis of online dating success rate in 2013 and 2019 carried out by Pew Research Center addresses the ‘how successful is online dating’ question with precision. The number of adults in the US who have used online dating platforms has risen from 11% to 48% among straight couples and 55% among LGBTQ couples in the past six years. Similarly, the number of those who found a spouse or long-term partner through these portals has also grown from 3% to about 20%.
The survey also indicates that more users view their experience on online dating platforms as positive. In terms of online dating pros and cons, the survey suggests that people view the likelihood of meeting people they share interests with and find attractive as a big plus. On the other hand, the tendency to exaggerate or lie about oneself to come off as more desirable is considered a big downside. Something that can make the experience frustrating.
While these statistics establish the growing effectiveness of online dating beyond a doubt, you don’t really need online dating success rate figures to know that it works. Take the example of Emily, a former media professional, who connected with Jason from Germany on a dating app three years ago. They were married six months later, and she has since moved halfway across the world to be with the love of her life. “We just clicked,” she says, commenting on whether she feels things progressed too quickly.
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Isha from India, connected with Martin during her second year living in the US. Even though they live in different cities, the relationship progressed from casual dating to a long-term committed one rather organically. He proposed, she said yes. They’re waiting for the Coronavirus pandemic to let up to tie the knot. These are not isolated stories. Look around, and you will find people in your immediate social circle who found their happily-ever-after with a single swipe.
So, how successful is online dating? Well, it can be a pretty solid approach to finding love and companionship provided you have the right strategy for finding the right mate online.
13 Tips To Date Online Successfully And Find Your Ideal Partner
This brings us to the million-dollar question: what is the ‘right strategy’ for finding the right mate online? Well, there is no one-size-fits-all approach on how to date online successfully. Fortunately, there are certain broad guidelines that you can take advantage of and find online dating success. The recipe for success depends on knowing what you’re seeking from dating and tweaking these guidelines to fit your personal goals and criteria. That’s the best online dating advice in a nutshell.
Have been caught in the cycle of left and right swipes that lead to nowhere for far too long? Or has your online date during COVID endeavor worn you out? Perhaps you have only just gotten started with your online dating pursuits. Whatever it may be, we are here to make things easier. Take note of these 13 actionable tips to date online successfully and find your ideal partner:
1. Know what you want for dating online successfully
Whether you’re looking for online dating tips for beginners or have been struggling to make headway for a long time, this is a non-negotiable cornerstone for dating online successfully. Before you start looking for matches or even create a new profile, take a moment to understand what you want out of online dating. Are you looking for some casual fun? Do you want a potential long-term partnership?
The meaning of how to do online dating successfully can change depending on what you seek from the experience. Gain clarity on the front, first and foremost.
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2. The right platform for finding the right mate online
Gone are the days when online dating was synonymous with Tinder. Today, users have access to so many alternative dating apps, each with a distinct USP and target audience. Find a platform that aligns perfectly with your dating goals.
Rashminder Kaur, an entrepreneur tells us, “One has to first decide which online portal is best for your needs. Are you looking for a casual connection, a long-term relationship or marriage? My criterion was to find someone with whom I shared my spiritual path. So I did not look at any wedding sites. I created a profile on SpiritualSingles.com. So decide what website is best for you and stick to that. Do not create profiles on multiple sites at one time. Stick with one or two and wait. If they don’t work, then change and try something else.”
This increases the likelihood of meeting people who are in a similar place as you and want similar things from life and relationships. Finding the right mate online becomes a lot less intimidating when you’re interacting with like-minded people with common interests and similar life goals.
3. Choose your pictures mindfully
Whether you’re wondering how to online date as a woman or a man, this is a crucial part of the process. Put some time and effort into clicking the photos you want to post on your dating profile. Being yourself doesn’t mean using a photo of you sitting in your PJs with a tub of ice cream on your lap as the display image for your dating profile.
Whether we like it or not, aesthetics play an important role in the blossoming of romantic connections. So, put your best foot forward and make your pictures as appealing as possible. However, at the same time, steer clear of the photoshop trap. You don’t want to hide any perceived ‘flaws’ just for the sake of getting hits.
Think ahead to how it’d play out when you meet an online connection in real life. If your photos are fake or made up, it’ll instantly kill your chances of online dating success. Show yourself some self-love, embrace whatever you think is flawed about your body, and then, embellish yourself a little to create some eye-catching photos.
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4. Thoughtful bio is the key to online dating etiquette
The key to online dating success also lies in the effort you put into your bio. A profile that is just a long bucket list of characteristics and traits you’re looking for in a potential match will not get you the responses you’re hoping for. Anyone who is invested in the idea of finding a long-term connection through online dating would want to get to know the person on the other side before making a move.
Prerna Shah, a content and communications professional and the co-founder of The Good Story Project, has some great insights on the same. She says, “Before you write your bio for an online site, think about a couple of things that describe you in an authentic manner.” List these things down and then weave them into your bio. Your text should be simple, engaging and most importantly, an honest reflection of you as a person.
“My husband and I ‘met’ each other on a matrimonial website. My bio or introduction was slightly long – I remember that it mentioned my love for books and for art. In contrast, my husband’s bio was fairly crisp. Though we shared a lot of common interests and core values, our bios were also a reflection of our individual personalities – my talkativeness, and his silent, introverted ways,” she adds.
So the answer to how to date online successfully and finding a long-term partner is making your bio about yourself. It should reflect your values, goals, passions and who you’re as a person. And not just what you want in a relationship. Add that to your online dating etiquette and you are off to a wonderful start!
5. Leverage the dating site algorithms for online dating success
A dating platform needs to understand who you’re to be able to suggest relevant matches. To make that happen, you need to leverage the dating site algorithms the right way. If done right, that could be half the battle won. This entails investing time to answer the quizzes and filling up surveys that the platform prompts you to take part in.
Using the right filters and advanced search settings is also a smart way of letting a dating app know what you’re looking for. Want to find a good man quickly? Then put enough information about yourself out there. You’ll see the right suggestions for you sprouting much more then.
6. Update your profile often
This is often a crucial part of the puzzle that people often miss out on when seeking an answer to how to online date as a man or woman. If the suggestions on your profile seem stale and repetitive, it’s a reflection of a stale and outdated profile. As soon as you notice this pattern, revisit your profile to see what you can change, edit, update.
Adding new photos, including recent life updates in your bio can work wonders in attracting fresh match suggestions. So don’t just upload that one old cute picture from the holidays and then forget about it. Keep your profile running!
7. How to online date as a woman? Block liberally
How to online date as a woman? Pay attention to your online hygiene. If you feel that your profile is attracting creeps more than potential matches or the suggestions are not relevant, don’t hesitate to hit the block or remove button. This will help declutter your profile and filter out potential matches as well as keep you safe from the threats women face in online dating.
There is no list of etiquette for online dating which tells you that you cannot block or remove a person. At the end of the day, not only is this about finding love but also about staying safe and having a good time. Besides, over time the dating site algorithms will understand what type of suggestions you respond to.
8. How to online date as a man? Expand your presence
Are you wondering how to online date as a man and find a good match? Well, start by diversifying your presence on different dating sites. Now, we’re not suggesting that you blindly sign up on every platform that you know of or make so many profiles that you can’t even recall half of them.
But take the time to determine the best dating sites that align with your goals and create profiles on at least a couple of them. Then, keep them active. Diversifying your outreach will automatically increase the likelihood of finding the right match. You’ve got to work hard and keep at it if you are serious about finding the woman of your dreams!
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9. Online dating tips for beginners: Keep expectations realistic
If you’re new to the online dating scene, there is a good chance that you’re going in with a Utopian view of how this system works. You match with 10 people or 20. Filter out half of that number. Talk to them. Go on a first date. Then, a second. Develop a meaningful connection with at least one of them. Well, sorry to burst your bubble but it is often more tricky than that. That’s why keeping your expectations realistic is one of the most crucial online dating tips for beginners.
Albert Arul Prakash Rajendran, an agile coach who previously ran a dating insight, has a phenomenal idea to add to this list. He tells us, “On dating apps, there are a lot of filters to enhance the physical appearance in the photos. Many do that to show themselves as beautiful and we people tend to expect much more from them based on their looks. When we really meet, reality hits and tells a different story.
“Moreover, based on the chats we have on dating sites, we create an alter ego (prince/princess charming) personality about the other person. When reality hits, we also break ourselves. Again.” That is why don’t let the bad or less-than-ideal experiences ruin it for you. Hang in there, persevere, persist. Remember, it takes only one right person to break the cycle forever.
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10. How to date online successfully? Be committed
If you’re serious about finding the right mate online, you have to commit yourself to the process of looking for one. This means investing time and money (in premium memberships). Make it a habit to spend at least a couple of hours on the dating platforms you’ve signed upon. Use this time well to look for matches, analyze their profiles, and use the right conversation starters to hit it off with those you’ve already connected with.
Yes, it can be hard to take out a few hours every day from hectic schedules to stare at strangers’ photos or think of appropriate responses to their advances. But you’ve got to do what you’ve got to do. That’s the simple secret of how to date online successfully.
11. Sound optimistic for dating online successfully
Think about what you would look for in a profile if you’re considering dating a person. Would you lean in favor of someone who uses words like ‘easygoing’, ‘fun’, ‘relaxed’ and ‘happy’ to describe themselves? Or would you be drawn to someone who chooses words like ‘hard taskmaster’, ‘ambitious’, ‘loner’, ‘recluse’? The former, right?
Well, there is no reason why a person looking at your profile wouldn’t feel the same way too. So, focus on highlighting your optimistic and bright side on your dating profile. Maybe even keep the cynical aspects of your personality dormant for dating online successfully.
12. Use some tips for online dating conversations and then move onto phone calls
One of the rather unexpected things that get in the way of online dating success is a stunted conversation. Yes, texting while dating (or trying to) is great and the go-to for interaction for most millennials. So use these Tinder openers to get things started. But also when you’re talking to a complete stranger, you cannot get a sense of who they really are from just their text messages.
A person conveys so much through the tone of their voice, the way they emphasize certain words, the sound of their laughter and so on. So, get over your inhibitions and make that first call once you sense that your connection with someone could materialize into something meaningful. Use such tips for online dating conversations to really keep the other person interested and hooked to you.
Related Reading: Goodbye Tinder? Goodbye hook-up artistes?
13. Research your date
When you start interacting with a match, invest a little into researching your online date before meeting them in person. Start by asking them their full name. Once you have it, a quick internet search can lead you to their social media profiles. What a person shares on Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter or Instagram can tell you a lot about their thoughts, values and outlook toward life.
Swapna Peri, a narrator, editor and book reviewer, has interesting advice to give us on the same. Her take is, “Try to always keep a check on them if you feel you want to commit to them in any manner. It ain’t stalking but a step to be careful. It’s like just a watch on the language they use, the kind of feelings they share and their truthfulness in conversations.”
If you spot any apparent red flags, you can pull the plug before getting emotionally invested in the person. On the other hand, if you like what you see, it gives you even more reason to pursue them wholeheartedly.
The secret to how to date online successfully is about marketing yourself as a desirable potential partner as well as developing a keen eye for spotting profiles that resonate with you. With time, patience and practice, you can ace your online dating game and find your forever partner.
Yes, in today’s times, online dating is the preferred way of finding romantic partners. By sitting this trend out, you risk missing out on connecting with your ideal match because a majority of people are looking for love on dating apps and sites.
Yes, online dating has become substantially more successful than traditional dating. People prefer signing up on a dating platform to asking friends to set them up, hitting on people in bars or making advances toward co-workers or friends. This is not to say that these traditional dating methods have become completely obsolete. But they’re definitely becoming less and less sought after.
Yes, as per the PEW Research survey, 20% of the respondents claimed to have found a spouse or long-term partner through online dating.
To date online effectively, you have to put yourself out there and strive to make your profile as appealing as possible. At the same time, being active on dating platforms and proactively seeking matches is also an integral part of online dating success.