Sex is an experience, which if made good, can be out of this world. But restricting your sexual life to mundane positions and random quickies might not always give you that. To truly make the experience fulfilling, you should open up your mind to the concept of generosity sex.
For both the man and the woman, sex should not just be a channel for satisfying one’s personal desires, but also an act of giving. While your own desires may drive your sexual urges, you cannot be ignorant of your partner’s needs.
The Importance Of Generosity Sex
It is said that a way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. I also heard a stand-up comedian say that it’s a couple of inches lower, and have the audience in peals of laughter. It’s funny, but also has a hint of truth in it. Generosity sex, I suppose, is meant to fulfill a man’s gastric desires too?
Jokes aside, there is a reason why a well-fed man can choose to stay in a sexual relationship, and for that, we need to refer to the subject of nutrition. Yes, the correlation between food and sex. Dr Susanna Holt at Sydney University in Australia developed a satiety index of common foods in the mid-’90s.
It charts which food is most likely to keep hunger at bay by measuring how full people feel after consuming the same amount of calories from a variety of different foods. That is why having a croissant just makes you happier than a bowl of oat porridge. It’s like touching the gastronomic G-spot! What a great hack to sexual generosity!
There are many ways to be a generous lover and embrace the concept of sex, emotions and our bodies in its entirety. We give you a few ways you can be more mindful of how you practice generosity sex.
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One night is not long enough
At a lecture to a class of 20-year-olds, I asked what their preferences were when it came to sex. About 20% of boys said one-night stands; 5% were in a relationship but said they were serial offenders. The rest of the boys and all the girls were in the ‘Don’t know/Can’t tell’ category.
I laughed to think some students still maintained their reserve. I knew that one particular girl had serial bouts with 10 of her classmates. So I asked the first lot why they chose the stingy one-night stand route. The most common gripe was that they could not handle the drama and clinginess in the women. Fair point, I thought.
So, I suggested they should try ‘tantric sex’ and that they couldn’t possibly do that with ONS (One Night Stand) sexual escapades. That brought on a roar of laughter and catcalls, and one boy yelled, “Ma’am, we can’t wait for all our chakras to open till we do it!”
That was that – they were not willing to take any advice from a 57-year-old woman with one tooth less in her smile. That is why, though most were training to be gourmet chefs, they would satisfy their hunger with a bucket of KFC.
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Being a generous lover
Yeah, so where am I going with the concept of generosity sex? A couple in love is more likely to give their 100% in making their partner happy.
That does not mean that both partners do, or are equally happy. I have noticed that the person who invests more time with her partner, is a foodie, and is completely self-expressed, is a better lover – to put in male terms “is good in bed”.
When young girls would come to me with requests for tips to have a good marriage – I would say keep him happy, learn to give a good blowjob. That truly is sexual generosity. Their jaws would drop in horror and I would tell them – it’s not a guarantee that he will not stray, but is as good as Feviquik.
Practical advice for better sexual generosity
Why is generosity important? Because both parties deserve to have equal fun. To the male students, the advice was the same; however, I would enlighten them that women take a much longer time to have an orgasm, and therefore, there are things men can do for better foreplay, and practice the Kegels exercise to have a much longer pleasure-time with his woman.
To the ones who were willing to learn more, I would say sex is more than an activity where the end goal is pleasure or reproduction for that matter. It is a way to express your love, gratitude and adoration of this person in front of you. After all, it isn’t as if you were paying for a prostitute or a gigolo. Sex and virtue really do go hand in hand.
It could be a spontaneous, playful, cavorting ending in sex – but is that sustainable? So this generation is also addicted to novelty in everything – so they better be imaginative and innovative. After some time has passed, you need to provide the GI with the satiety index.
When navigating the nuances of generosity sex, I’d say you should try this – try to treat your partner as your God for the moment and let sex be the pooja or the adoration with all of your senses. This not only enables sensual heights but also provides comfort, security and that out-of-this-world feeling of transcendence.
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Sex and virtue – make it mindful
Are you a generous husband or wife? Really, think about it. You have to elevate sex from the porn videos and stop considering it a sport-like activity or a chore. If you look at yourselves from a position of being a witness, sex looks like hilarious, animal-like tomfoolery. Make it a ballet, an in-depth exploration of your feelings and sensations. The virtue of generosity lies in knowing that nothing about it is perfect, and thus, having realistic expectations.
To achieve that, one must practice mindful meditation. For example – pick up a flower and accept every little aspect of it – the perfume, color, the firmness of each petal, even the wilting petal. Appreciate the wholesomeness of the person in front of you, in a similar fashion. Your sexual generosity will appear profusely.
For good sex, you have to be generous, with your attention, your love, with your will, your conversation and sometimes your money too! Being a generous lover is not that hard. It is just about being accepting and understanding the other person’s needs well.
Generosity sex is when you are willing to make sex an experience and not just a release. Even if it is just casual, sex should be a thrilling experience that heightens your senses instead of just a simple quickie. To be generous means to understand one’s needs well and invest themselves fully in bed.
When someone is generous, they pay attention to each part of your body. The appreciate you, express their desires well and try to make it a fulfilling experience whether they use sex toys for women or master the art of blowjobs.
Sexual generosity is shown when one is fully present and attentive in the sexual encounter. That naturally builds a good chemistry too. They know how to please you and are willing to show you a good time.