Women and their sex fantasies

Sex is on everyone’s mind

I was talking to a friend of mine the other day when she happened to mention something I wasn’t aware of. I don’t think most people are actively aware of this – she said that “Most girls don’t really need porn or visual aid of some kind to get us going, we can pleasure ourselves just by using our imagination.”

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While I’m not saying that all of us always have access to pornography, the idea that my female friend’s fantasy life was active enough and that visual aids weren’t a necessity ever, was wonderful. This is not a scientific fact however so I don’t claim that this applies to all women.

It got me thinking however about what kind of fantasies most women have, so I asked around. I must say I have an amazing group of friends who sent in detailed texts in response to my question. These brave friends will remain anonymous but here are the replies.

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Tied up

I and my boyfriend at that time were living in and we both had freelance jobs so we were pretty much in control of our own time. We used to do whatever we wanted, at whatever time we wanted, you know what I mean? One day, I woke up before him, and was making a sculpture out of pieces of fabric, for a show I was shortly going to be at. They were these long narrow strips of fabric and were pretty sturdy. That got me thinking. Long story short, my boyfriend woke up with both his hands and legs tied and me standing over him wearing a lacy see-through top. We used to sleep in the nude so that made things very easy. Then one thing led to another. It was amazing.

Kitchen sex

I know this isn’t new, but I love the idea of having sex on the countertop. I imagine him cooking or making tea and me approaching him. Like responsible adults, we switch off the stove or any source of heat (well, except our bodies) and then do it. Right there in the kitchen. This one works for me every time.

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Pool Boy

This one’s going to sound like porn but I have always wanted to do it in a pool. I imagine I’m in the pool swimming and he’s either the lifeguard or the pool boy and the pool is closed so no one else comes in and we make use of that alone time.

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In the shower, a specific shower

I don’t know why but I want to do it in a shower with glass walls. The idea that if someone was to accidentally walk into your room they’d be seeing two intertwined bodies behind a curtain of steam is hilarious and yet erotic to me. I don’t actually want anyone to walk in on me having sex, but the whole, ‘If the door to the room were open, we could be seen!’ feeling gives me such a rush!

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The revolutionary

(This friend is a civil rights activist. She’s into a lot of protests and attends quite a few rallies.) I want to do it in the middle of a protest. In front of everyone, while they cheer us on. Our act of love, the fact that we are open and naked and daring to love and be seen, itself being an act of revolution. I would really like to do that one day.

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In the rain

I want to do it in the rain. In the middle of a lot of trees. Or even a beach will do. During high tide. There has to be rain covering every part of us. It has to be outside though, like in the midst of nature. I don’t want to do it on the terrace while it rains. A beach or the forest in the rain!

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Camping sex

Okay so, it has to be a snow-clad mountain. Not on top of the mountain but like, it has to be visible from the door flaps of the tent. In the tent, two sleeping bags that we basically tangle into one and then keep each other warm through the cold night and day.

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The thrill

I want to do it in a room in the house while everyone’s in another room having a party. It doesn’t have to be a lot of people, but enough for them to not notice that we’re missing. Call me weird but just imagining it gets my blood pumping.

When my breakup led me to extreme sexual frustration

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