If you’ve ever waited for your phone to buzz, hoping for a message, you know exactly how agonizing the experience is. However, since texting is now at the heart of modern attraction, there is no getting around using your digital interactions to draw a guy in and keep him hooked. If you can’t avoid it, the best thing to do is master the art of using your texts to spark his interest. No, it’s not a lofty goal. You can make a guy chase you and think about you with just your text messages if you know how to spark curiosity and intimacy. The trick is authenticity with a touch of mystery. We simplify it for you with 9 texts to get him chasing you.
5 Ways To Get A Guy’s Attention Over Text Messages
Table of Contents
Before you jump into sending those butterflies-inducing lines, it helps to know what are the kinds of texts to keep a guy interested. Or the texting style that will catch his eye and make him eager to reply. Keep these five tips in mind and you won’t ever have to worry about how to get him to chase you over text:
1. Think before you text
It’s tempting to grab your phone and fire off a quick, “hey wyd”, when you like someone. But if you want to stand out, put a little thought into your texts. A random, dry opener can kill a conversation before it begins. Instead, craft your message with intent. What do you want him to feel or do when he reads it? Maybe you want to make him laugh, or prompt him to ask you out. Tailor your text accordingly. One of the best texting tips is to prepare some ideas ahead of time. That way, you’re not scrambling for something to say and accidentally texting something you’ll regret.
For example, make a note of a funny incident from your day or a quirky question you could ask him later. That ensures you always have engaging material to pull from when the chat runs dry. By planning just a little, you avoid the risk of dry texting or those dreaded one-word texts or the generic “what’s up.”
2. Flirt and use humor
Don’t be shy. A little playful flirting goes a long way over text. In fact, flirting via text might be easier than doing it face-to-face because you have time to choose the perfect witty comeback or flirty one-liner. Use that to your advantage. Tease him a bit, drop a cute compliment, or throw in a well-placed 😉 emoji. There’s nothing wrong with being bold and showing your interest. If he can keep up with your flirty banter, he’ll likely love it. Flirty texts are often the best kind of messages to spark his desire and make him chase you. After all, who doesn’t enjoy a bit of cheeky fun with someone they like?
Related Reading: How To Keep A Guy Interested? 20 Ways To Keep Him Engaged
3. Be genuine and authentic
While flirting and jokes are great, nothing beats being yourself. It might sound like cliché advice, but it’s crucial. Don’t pretend to be into football or start using slang you never normally use just because you think it’ll impress him. If this thing progresses, you’ll eventually hang out in person, and he’ll find out you actually hate football and have been Googling sports terms for weeks. Awkward.
It’s much better to let your true personality shine from the start. So if you’re a goofy sci-fi nerd, be a goofy sci-fi nerd. If you have a soft side, send those sweet, innocent texts that will make him want you by showing you care. The right guy will appreciate the real you. And if he doesn’t? Well, better to find out sooner than later.
4. Don’t be clingy
Not everyone texts back in 0.2 seconds, and that’s okay. One of the biggest mistakes to avoid is coming across as impatient or needy over text. We get it, waiting for a reply from someone you like can be agonizing. Your heart jumps every time your phone buzzes. But double texting or bombarding him with “???” or “helloooo?” if he hasn’t responded in an hour is the fastest way to turn him off. Guys typically don’t appreciate clingy messages like, “Why haven’t you texted me back in 2 hours?” or “Where did you go? 🥺”. Messages like that scream anxious energy and can make him feel pressured. Instead, play it cool and give him the space to reply on his own time.
So if he hasn’t replied, distract yourself. Text a friend, watch a show, live your life. When you do hear that ding, respond pleasantly, maybe even a bit playfull,y about his slow reply, if that fits your dynamic. Showing that you have your own life and confidence makes him more likely to chase after your attention.
Related Reading: 21 Texting Habits Of A Guy Who Likes You – With Examples
5. Take initiative and show interest
Gone are the days when you had to wait by the phone for him to make the first move. If you want to grab his attention, don’t be afraid to send the first text sometimes or to be the one who says outright, “I miss you” or “let’s hang out Friday.” Guys actually find it refreshing when a woman shows interest directly. It takes some pressure off them and also signals that you’re confident. The key here is balance and sincerity. You’re not going to start triple-texting “hello???”, but make an effort to match his effort or take the lead in showing interest.
Summary of YouTube transcript
This video explains five texting strategies that keep men interested and invested. It highlights why less texting creates anticipation, how moving slowly builds curiosity, and why showing your life through actions is stronger than constant words. It also stresses avoiding over-validating through text and focusing on making real connections in person. The goal is to let men pursue while you keep your space and value clear.
9 Texts To Get Him Chasing You
Texting can feel like a game of chess when you’re figuring out how to get him to chase you over text. The right words can spark curiosity, make him laugh, or remind him why he can’t stop thinking about you. These 9 texts to get him chasing you achieve just that, not through manipulation or mind games but by sparking connection in a way that feels natural, playful, and a little irresistible. From flirty openers that draw him in, romantic texts that spark attraction, and thoughtful reminders that deepen the bond, each one has its own psychology behind why it works. Use them wisely, and you’ll see how easily the chase can flip in your favor.
1. The flirty opener
Flirty texts work because they mix curiosity with playfulness, which creates a spark. You’re hinting at interest without being over-the-top, and that gives a guy something to go after. Psychologists point out that flirtation works as a “social glue” because it signals attraction without heavy pressure. Dr. Karin Anderson Abrell, a psychologist and relationship expert, explains, “Flirting is fun because it’s ambiguous. It allows people to express attraction while keeping a sense of mystery.” That mix of lightness, teasing, and suggestion is exactly what makes him lean in instead of pulling away.
When to use it: Send a flirty opener when you want to break the ice, shift the conversation into something more fun, or keep the spark alive during a lull. You can also send flirty texts to send before a date or after one.
The best flirty texts for him:
- “I had the funniest dream last night… and you were in it 👀”
- “Okay, serious question: are you always this distracting or is it just me?”
- “You’d lose against me in Mario Kart. Just saying.”
- “Stop being so interesting, I’m trying to focus here 😏”
- “I saw something today that reminded me of you… should I tell you or keep you guessing?”
2. The compliment that sticks
Wondering how to keep him hooked through texting or make a guy obsessed with you with just text messages? You can’t go wrong with a well-meaning, genuine compliment. Compliments trigger what psychologists call the reciprocity principle. When someone receives a compliment, they naturally want to reciprocate, whether it’s in the form of more attention, warmth, or effort.
So, compliments are among the surefire ways to deepen connection over text but the kicker is that you must avoid clichés. Generic compliments are nice, but they don’t leave a lasting impression. Personalized compliments about his sense of humor, the way he explains things, or even his quirks hit differently because they show you actually notice him.
When to use it: Perfect when you want to make him feel seen, valued, and attractive without being overbearing.
Compliments that men actually love:
- “I love how you get so animated when you talk about things you care about.”
- “You have this way of making people feel comfortable. It’s rare.”
- “Honestly, you make Monday mornings way less painful.”
- “You always know the most random facts… I secretly love it.”
- “The way you look when you’re focused is unfairly attractive.”
Related Reading: 15 Sureshot Ways To Make A Guy Text You Every Day
3. The inside joke callback
Inside jokes are powerful because they create a sense of shared reality. You move from “you and me” to “us.” Psychologists call this “in-group language,” and it’s one of the fastest ways to deepen intimacy. The callback text reminds him that you have private little moments together that no one else is in on.
As Dr. John Gottman, a leading relationship researcher, says, “Successful couples create a culture of shared meaning.” So, bringing up inside jokes or shared moments definitely makes the cut for messages that make him think of you. Use them well.
When to use it: Drop an inside joke after a fun date, or during a late-night conversation. It also works well in long-distance relationships, and goes on to show you’re tuned into the little things and makes him feel instantly more connected to you. When used right, inside jokes are the perfect texts to make him miss you.
Playful inside jokes to send over text:
- “Guess who I saw today? Yep, the barista who ruined your ‘perfect’ latte art.”
- “I just passed a claw machine and thought of your tragic arcade skills.”
- “Reminder: you still owe me a rematch. No excuses.”
- “Just saw pineapple pizza… should I start running before you yell at me?”
- “I heard that song again today and instantly thought of our car karaoke.”
4. The playful tease
Teasing, when done right, works because it creates tension without malice. It’s light-hearted, a little cheeky, and makes him want to rise to the challenge. Playful teasing taps into banter, which has proven to increase attraction because it mimics the push-pull dynamic of flirting. This is one of the 9 texts to get him chasing you that never fails to hit the mark because it makes the connection fun, not serious or heavy. If you’re serious about getting a man’s attention, you must master the art of crafting playful texts for him.
“Teasing is a way of saying ‘I like you’ without spelling it out. It’s attraction wrapped in humor.”
—Matthew Hussey, dating coach
When to use it: Whenever you find yourself wondering what to say when he stops texting or what to text when the conversation gets dry, give the good ol’ playful teasing a try. It adds energy to the conversation or shows affection without being sappy.
Playful texts for him:
- “Wait… are you really one of those people who don’t like dessert? 🚩😂”
- “You call that cooking? I’m filing a complaint.”
- “So you’re the type who’d survive a zombie apocalypse by hiding, huh?”
- “I bet you take 45 minutes to order at a restaurant, don’t you?”
- “Careful, your ‘dad jokes’ card is showing again.”
Related Reading: How To Start A Conversation With A Guy – 30 Tips
5. The subtle suggestion
If you’ve been wondering how to trigger desire through texting, subtle suggestion is the way to go. Subtle, suggestive texts work because they plant a thought without spelling everything out. They create a gap, and humans naturally want to fill gaps. That’s why innuendo is often more powerful than explicit lines. It makes him imagine, and imagination is the root of anticipation. It’s all about teasing his mind. When you do that, he’s sure to double down on his efforts to chase you because that’s how men respond to teasing messages.
“A little suggestion sparks curiosity and keeps the energy playful. It leaves space for the other person to join in.”
—Emily Morse, sex educator
When to use it: Drop a suggestive text when you want to build tension and anticipation before seeing him. It’s the most powerful tool for creating mystery over text
Texts to build anticipation:
- “Remind me to tell you what I was thinking about last night 👀”
- “I shouldn’t say what I’m picturing right now…”
- “Careful, I might be trouble if we’re left alone too long.”
- “That shirt you wore last time… unfair.”
- “You’d probably get me in trouble if we were at a work meeting together.”
6. The genuine check-in
The texts to keep a guy interested don’t always have to flirty or suggestive. Sometimes, the most powerful texts you can send a man are the ones that show how much you care. Relationship coach Susan Winter explains: “When someone remembers the small details of your life, you feel seen and valued.” This goes on to build intimacy with your man over text.
A genuine check-in shows that you’re invested in his well-being, and that makes it among the most powerful texts that create emotional intimacy. It’s simple, but it hits the right chord.
When to use it: Perfect when you know he’s got something going on, no matter how big or small. It’s how you show you’re paying attention.
Texts that create emotional intimacy:
- “How did your presentation go today?”
- “Did you end up winning that soccer match?”
- “Just checking in — how’s your week treating you?”
- “I know today was packed for you. Want to vent or just chill?”
- “Did you ever survive that Monday coffee shortage?”
Related Reading: How Guys Text When They Like You – We Give You 15 Clues
7. The throwback reminder
Throwback texts are about nostalgia, and more often than not, they hold the answer to how to keep him hooked through texting. Memory plays an important role in triggering attraction because emotions linked to a moment can be reactivated later. That’s why raking up nostalgia is among the surefire messages that make him think of you. By reminding him of a shared moment you’re re-sparking his feelings.
“Recalling shared positive experiences strengthens bonds because it makes both partners relive the emotions of that time.”
—Dr. Terri Orbuch, psychologist
When to use it: Send a throwback text when you want to reignite warmth, laughter, or affection. This can be especially useful if you start seeing signs he’s losing interest over text.
Throwback messages that make him think of you:
- “Remember when we got lost on the way to that café? Still hilarious.”
- “I just walked past that bookstore we found. Made me think of you.”
- “Randomly remembered that time you tried to teach me pool… emphasis on tried 😂”
- “That sunset photo you took popped up in my phone. Still one of my faves.”
- “Saw someone wearing that ridiculous hat from our inside joke — instant flashback.”
8. The future conversation
Future-oriented texts work because they plant the idea that this connection isn’t fleeting. You’re nudging him to imagine a future together. It’s a subtle way of weaving yourself into his mental map. Explaining why this works, dating expert Logan Ury says, “When people start talking about the future together, even casually, it creates a sense of investment.” The key here is to keep it light, not turn it into a heavy “where is this going” conversation.
When to use it: Send these when you’re looking for ways to deepen connection over text or want to spark excitement.
Future-oriented texts to keep a guy interested:
- “Next time, drinks are on you. I’m keeping score.”
- “We definitely need a rematch of that game night.”
- “Someday, we’re totally trying that crazy food spot.”
- “Okay, so when are we signing up for karaoke?”
- “I’m adding ‘coffee tour with you’ to my bucket list.”
9. The unexpected surprise
How to keep him hooked through texting, you ask? Be unpredictable, be novel. Random, thoughtful texts work because they create novelty. The element of surprise is linked to stronger emotional responses, and when you surprise someone in a positive way, it leaves a mark. You’re catching him off guard, in the best way. And that can turn an ordinary day into something better and make sure that you stay on his mind.
When to use it: Use this when you want to brighten his day out of nowhere. It works especially well if he’s having a long week.
Surprise-inducing texts to keep him hooked:
- “Hey, just wanted to say I’m glad I met you.”
- “You randomly popped into my head, so… hi 😄”
- “Hope your day’s as good as your smile. (Too cheesy?)”
- “Thinking of you. No reason, just because.”
- “You make my day better without even trying.”
FAQs
Texts that remind him of a shared memory, spark curiosity, or leave a little mystery usually do the trick. For example, saying, “Passed by that café we went to, instantly thought of you,” makes him feel nostalgic and connected. A short, thoughtful message like that lingers in his mind longer than an over-the-top declaration.
There’s no magic number, but balance is key. If you flood him with constant messages, the spark fades. If you barely reach out, he may lose interest. A mix of light banter, appreciation, and a few flirty texts spread out through the week keeps him engaged without making it feel one-sided.
Dry spells happen, but the right message can shift the energy. Try sending a playful challenge like, “Quick, no thinking — what’s your guilty pleasure snack?” or a curiosity spark such as, “I just saw something that reminded me of you, want to guess what it was?” These kinds of texts revive the conversation without forcing it.
Key Pointers
- Flirty, teasing, and playful messages work best because they create curiosity and leave room for imagination
- Men respond strongly to texts that validate them, whether through admiration, humor, or subtle compliments
- A balance of fun through inside jokes or playful challenges to send over text and emotional depth through appreciation or memory triggers keeps the chase alive
- Timing matters. Knowing when to send each type of text makes all the difference in keeping him engaged
Final Thoughts
These 9 texts to get him chasing you work so well because they’re not manipulative but genuine ways to express your interest and spark his. Think of these as tools, not tricks. They work because they tap into basic human needs to feel desired, to laugh, to be reminded, to be appreciated. Send them with authenticity, not pressure, and you’ll notice how naturally he leans in. And remember, the best kind of chase is mutual. That’s when the connection really sticks.
How To Ask A Guy Out? 21 Creative Ideas To Set You Up For Success
Your contribution does not constitute a charitable donation. It will allow Bonobology to continue bringing you new and up-to-date information in our pursuit of helping anyone in the world to learn how to do anything.
Featured
Dating With Intention: Meaning And Rules To Set You Up For Success
How To Ask Out Your Crush: Step-By-Step Guide To Success
How to Start A Conversation With Your Crush – Pro Tips for Every Situation
I Need A Girlfriend: 9 Things To Consider And 11 Tips On How To Find One
How To Approach A Girl The Right Way – Pro Tips And Conversation Starters
The Ultimate Tips On How To Ask A Girl To Be Your Girlfriend
Is It A Date Or Are You Just Hanging Out? 17 Helpful Tips To Know
21 Huge First Date Red Flags You Should Be Wary Of
Healthy Flirting Vs Unhealthy Flirting – 8 Key Differences
15 Early Signs A Relationship Will Not Last
17 Tips On How To Reject Someone Nicely—With Examples
Why Does He Keep Me Around If He Doesn’t Want A Relationship?
When A Guy Says I Love You Over Text – What Does It Mean And What To Do
15 Physical Signs A Woman Is Interested In You
How To Keep A Guy Interested? 20 Ways To Keep Him Engaged
15 Strong Signs Of Chemistry On A First Date
How To Ask A Guy To Be Your Boyfriend? 23 Cute Ways
18 Signs He Doesn’t Want A Relationship With You And What To Do
15 Spiritual Signs Your Ex Is Manifesting You
13 Female Physical Features That Attract A Man Immensely