15 Signs A Guy Is Nervous Around You And 5 Reasons Why

Single and Dating | | , Expert Blogger
Reviewed By , Psychologist
Updated On: February 21, 2024
signs a guy is nervous around you

Men can be confusing at times. They don’t reveal their emotions as women do. They like to play it cool even when they want to stutter and scream. However, there will be signs a guy is nervous around you if the guy likes you. There are many reasons that your date is feeling anxious. The simplest one: They like you a lot and don’t want to mess it up.

This has been proved by a study done on 280 participants. According to the study, people experienced a cluster of anxiety-related physiological and behavioral reactions during an initial encounter with someone they found highly attractive. See? If you’ve been thinking, “Why is a confident guy nervous around me?”, this could be the reason. Do what he may, he may not be able to hide the signs he really likes you.

Why Would A Guy Be Nervous Around You?

When a man is nervous around a woman but confident and outgoing with others, then there has to be some reason behind it. In most cases, this is because he is attracted to her. “Then how do I tell if a guy likes me if he is hardly able to talk to me?” you might ask. Listen to Angelina, a 25-year-old barista from New Jersey. She shares, “There’s a guy who used to come to the café. He looked good and was very self-assured with his friends. But when he came up to order, he was clearly nervous.

“His speech kept faltering. I thought, why is a confident guy nervous around me? Once he went back to his friends, he seemed his usual assertive self again. He messaged me on Instagram that night and asked if I would like to go on a date with him. I realized when a man is nervous around a woman, it’s probably because he has a crush on her. And if you’re going through the same, it’s one of the clearest signs a man is pursuing you.” 

We have a few more reasons that a guy could get nervous around women. Take a look:

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1. He finds you intimidating 

Women are taking control of their lives and don’t let anybody divert their focus from what they want. So, what makes a guy nervous around a girl? Intimidation. Some men are greatly intimidated by strong, successful, and confident women. 

A study reveals what men really think about smart women. It was found that men, while interacting with a woman who is smarter than them, can feel a “momentary shift in their self-evaluation (such as feeling emasculated),” which leads them to feel less attracted to her. Hell, that’s a reason some husbands lose interest in their wives too.

When asked on Quora about why men are intimidated by women, a user shared, “In my experience men are intimidated by successful, independent women. They are drawn to you because you know who you are, won’t tolerate BS, and can stand on your own. Then they hate you because you know who you are, you’re successful, independent, can stand on your own, and won’t tolerate BS.”

2. He finds you extremely attractive

A common query: “How do I tell if a guy likes me on a blind date?” Well, men turn into shy school boys when they are attracted to someone. Rhonda, a medical student in her mid-20s, tells you how to know if a guy likes you, “My friend set me up on a blind date once. The man was sweating profusely and refused to meet my eye.

“He kept looking at his food the entire time. It is one of the biggest turn-offs and spells doom for me personally, and I never interacted with him again. Later, I found out that he confessed to our mutual friend that he found me insanely attractive and couldn’t keep his emotions in check.”

3. He has social anxiety or a shy nature 

My friend once told me about a guy she liked, “He turns pale when he interacts with me. There’s a good chance he is into me, right?” I asked her with caution, “What if that happens when he talks to most people, though?” Frustrated, she asked me helplessly, “Then how to know if he likes me or not?”

Often, when someone’s nervous around a person, we think, “It’s a crush!” But hold on to that thought. Maybe he has social anxiety and doesn’t mingle with people so much. Social anxiety is becoming prevalent and a recent study done in 7 countries found that 1 in 3 (36%) respondents had Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD). Notice the other patterns: Maybe he isn’t so outspoken and he is also not an extrovert. He is nervous because that’s just what he goes through every day, and it has nothing to do with you. If you’re still confused, make the first move and see how he reacts.

Related Reading: Are You A Serial Monogamist? What It Means, Signs, And Characteristics

4. He thinks you are judgmental 

All of us prefer to see only the good side of ourselves and avoid the bad aspects. But think about this, even if it makes you feel uncomfortable. What makes a guy nervous around women? It’s possible that you are judgmental about him and this throws him off a little.

5. He is hiding something from you 

One of the easiest signs to pick up if a guy is hiding something from you is when he acts nervous and fidgety around you. Andrea, a graphic designer from Chicago, says, “My ex-boyfriend is a confident guy but not around me in the last few months of our relationship. He was constantly on the edge when I was with him. I would feel suspicious whenever he changed his passcode. I thought it is one of the signs he is cheating on me.

“He would stop using his phone as soon as I entered the room and didn’t engage in conversations with me anymore. I broke up with him when I found out he was talking to somebody else.”

15 Signs A Guy Is Nervous Around You

No matter how confident or even self-obsessed a person is, they always tend to get a little nervous when they are with someone they like. We have curated a list of 15 signs a guy is nervous around you. Whether this spells good news or bad, you decide.

1. No eye contact could be a glaring sign

Lack of eye contact can be an indication of various things like:

  • He could be hiding something from you
  • He could be angry with you
  • He could be feeling low
  • More importantly, avoiding eye contact is a sign of attraction

He will refuse to meet your gaze in an attempt to mask his feelings for you. You’re making him nervous. Maybe you are flirting with your eyes and he is doing the same by deliberately not meeting your gaze. This feeds into the whole “confident guy nervous around me” phenomenon, because when he avoids eye contact, it could be one of the ironic signs he likes you. 

body language signs a guy is into you
If he’s into you, he might avoid eye contact

2. You catch him looking at you 

Ever been in a situation where a guy stares at you when you aren’t looking and then immediately averts his gaze when you catch him staring at you? Yeah, that’s one of the signs a guy is nervous around you. He stares at you but he is too shy to greet your gaze. When you catch a guy staring at you, it is mostly because he is attracted to you.

When asked on Reddit what women thought when they catch a guy staring at them, a user shared, “Mostly I am flattered, and if I think he’s cute I’ll maybe say something to him. Sometimes it makes me feel self-conscious, especially if I don’t think I look that good on that particular day.”

3. He fidgets a lot

One of the signs he likes you is when he is being restless. He will fidget around you and won’t stay still. It could be because he is attracted to you or because he is hiding something from you. Men can get fidgety when they are guilty of doing something. They might fidget with their food or their words may not be in alignment with their thoughts.

Their mind is all over the place and they are trying to suppress their emotions. But it could mean anything. So if you’re trying to figure out how to know if a guy likes you, then just noticing the signs of fidgeting may not be enough. You’ll need to dig deeper.

Related Reading: The 36 Questions That Lead To Love

4. If he’s nervous around you, silence will unsettle him 

One of the major signs a guy is nervous around you is when he is bothered by silence. It’s great when you find someone who likes to engage in conversation. But nobody likes an overly chatty person. 

Jemimah, a librarian in her early 40s, says, “I enjoy silence. But I met a man who had a hard time with it. He was so eager to prove himself as chill and easygoing that he tried to fill in the silence by speaking about anything and everything. It was so obvious that he was just nervous and wanted to cover it with non-stop words. I mean, yes, if you ask me, that could be a sign he likes you. But these are exactly the kind of mistakes men should avoid on dates.”

5. He is sweaty 

How to know if a guy likes you? This ‘might’ be one of the ways to find out. Irrespective of gender, we all tend to sweat under stressful, exciting, and frightening circumstances. Our palms also get sweaty when we are around the ones we have a crush on because these glands begin to work harder as our excitement level increases. 

So, the next time you are looking for signs he really likes you, notice if he is sweating profusely. Or maybe he’s just stressed out of his mind.

infographic on 15 signs a guy is nervous around you
Signs a guy is nervous around you

6. His body is stiff

When someone is stressed or anxious, it directly reflects in their physical selves as well. Such small things are a dead giveaway of his feelings, especially in social situations. Your guy could be displaying many of the body language signs that he likes you — You just need to be paying close attention. So, if he sits and stands stiffly around you, these strange changes could very well be the answer to your “how to know if he likes me” confusion.

7. He keeps touching his face 

Is this one of the adorable signs he likes you too? Not really. According to psychologists at the BBC, when we touch certain areas of our face, what we are really doing is calming ourselves. There are specific pressure points on the face that activate the parasympathetic nervous system: It’s the body’s internal coping mechanism.

This can explain why we touch our faces when we are shocked, surprised, stressed, concentrating, worried, or upset. Subconsciously, our body is touching areas of the face — commonly the forehead, chin, and mouth — to soothe anxiety and, therefore, protect us. Anxiety and stress are the common reasons people touch their faces. It could also mean that the person is lying to you or hiding something. That’s why when a man is nervous around a woman, he keeps touching his face. 

Related Reading: An Expert Tells Us What Goes In The Mind Of A Cheating Man

8. “How do I tell if a guy likes me?” He will agree with everything you say

One of the signs a guy is nervous around you is when he agrees with everything you say. There is no retaliation to your opinions. We tend to be on our best behavior with someone we love because we are afraid if we disagree with them, we might end up hurting their sentiments. This is one of the ways to know if a guy secretly loves you.

Joseph, a dating coach from Atlanta, says, “A confident man who is not a people-pleaser doesn’t feel the need to blindly agree with everything that someone has to say. He will always offer his valuable two cents in every conversation. But if it’s a woman he really likes, then he becomes nervous and has a hard time staying completely sane. He just readily agrees to everything she has to say.”

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9. “Is he into me?” Yes, if he listens to you attentively

If he is very attentive around you, then it’s one of the most common signs he likes you. Is he shy? If yes, then this sign becomes even more relevant! It’s a known fact that shy guys are great listeners and make a naturally good impression that way.

Alex, a guitarist from Los Angeles, says, “When a confident guy is nervous around me, he won’t try to dominate the conversation or interrupt me when I am talking. He will listen closely to all my stories and will remember even the tiniest details.” 

10. He is plenty nervous if he laughs at everything 

An article titled What’s So Funny? Why We Laugh When We’re Nervous Or Uncomfortable, states that laughter has the effect of discharging energy and helping us relax. Joseph Nowinski, a clinical psychologist and author, says, “When we laugh at a good joke or a comic routine, we tend to feel more relaxed afterward.

“Nervous laughter serves a similar function, allowing the individual to discharge anxiety and relax a bit.” Similarly, when he laughs at everything you say and do, then it’s one of the signs a guy is nervous around you. It’s a defense mechanism for him to cope with his awkwardness.

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11. He tries to make you laugh 

When he is trying hard to make a woman laugh, it’s one of the biggest signs he really likes you. He will try to make jokes about everything. From the restaurant you’re dining at to the people sitting next to you. He will try to crack jokes at your expense as well. But that doesn’t mean he intends to be rude. He is just trying to get comfortable with you. It’s one of the signs he wants you to notice him really badly. Does that answer your “how do I tell if a guy likes me” dilemma?

When asked on Reddit about the one quality people look for in a partner, a user shared, “A sense of humor is incredibly important to me. I am absolutely attracted to wit and have been in situations before where when a man made me sincerely laugh, it has made him 10x more attractive to me. I am a sucker for comedy, humor, and intelligent/witty writing or banter, so that may just be me.”

If a guy is nervous around you, does it mean he likes you?

12. Body language signs a guy is into you — He blushes and smiles every time he sees you 

Blushing is when your face, mostly your cheeks, turns pink or red when you’re embarrassed, self-conscious, or when you have a crush on someone. Are you wondering, “Is he into me or is he just a friend?” See, if the guy you are dating blushes every time he sees you, then it’s one of the body language signs a guy is into you.

It’s a defense mechanism during fight or flight situations. According to a HuffPost article, The Body Language of Attraction, “When we are attracted to someone, blood will flow to our face, causing our cheeks to get red. This happens to mimic the orgasm effect where we get flushed. It is an evolutionary way the body tries to attract the opposite sex.”

13. How to know if a guy likes you? He uses a lot of emoticons 

This came from Jack, a 36-year-old reader from Austin: “Alright, I get that if I’m around him, I’ll know more about his feelings. But how to know if he likes me through text messages?” Look at the way he responds to your messages. His response will be prompt and he will make sure to use emoticons in every message. There are many emojis guys use when they are in love. It may seem a little childish and immature but he is just trying to cover up his nervousness with emojis.

When asked on Reddit about men’s use of emojis, a user said, “The idea that using emojis is somehow a feminine trait is complete BS. I know plenty of guys who use emojis regularly.”

Related Reading: Emotional Neglect In A Relationship – Meaning, Signs And Steps To Cope

14. He asks you a lot of questions

When he asks you a lot of questions, then it could be one of the signs a guy is nervous around you and is afraid to confess his feelings. He wants to fill the silence with questions and is eager to know everything about you. It might even be one of the signs he wants to make you his girlfriend.

Rachel, an engineering student from New York, says, “I’ve never had to think too much about ‘Is he into me?'” She tells us why, “Most guys I date are very curious to know everything about me during the initial stages of dating. They are so afraid of silence that they think silence is boring. Silence makes them nervous and they end up asking a lot of questions.”

15. He will be hesitant to touch you 

An interesting question we received from a reader: “How to know if he likes me when he keeps himself physically distant?” A guy who tends to feel nervous might not touch you, even if you like him and don’t mind him touching you. He doesn’t want you to have a bad impression of him, so he will not initiate physical contact. He might even quickly withdraw if you both unintentionally touch each other. It’s because he doesn’t want to offend you or make you feel uncomfortable. 

Key Pointers

  • If a guy is nervous around you, there are chances he finds you intimidating, judgmental, or attractive. If he likes you, he might use a lot of emoticons on text and will listen to you attentively
  • Other signs a guy is nervous around you: He laughs at everything you say, tries to make you laugh too, and you might even catch him looking at you
  • One of the prominent body language signs a guy is into you is that he will blush every time he sees you

Have you witnessed any of these signs a guy is nervous around you? Nervousness is a common feeling when we are put in a stressful situation. There’s nothing extraordinary about this, and it will go away once the two of you have developed a more intimate bond. 

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