Relationships 101

7 ways to handle a married man flirting with you

It never ends in a 'happily ever after' no matter what they say. A married man flirting with you will always choose his wife and family over anyone else.
Kay Kay Menon played the role of a married man flirting with the young and single Kangana Ranaut in the film Life in a Metro.

A married man may resort to flirting when he is dissatisfied with the current status and pace of his relationship or probably he will flirt with you to have some fun. Even if you reject him, he may still pursue you and try to manipulate you by telling you his feelings are real. Handling a married man flirting with you can be quite a complex situation and somewhere along the line you may feel drawn to him as well. If a married man is hitting on you, you are treading a dangerous path by reciprocating the feelings a married man shows towards you. You will unnecessarily complicate your life and end up being alone and devastated. Nothing good usually comes out of a relationship with a married man. So read on, as we will make you an expert in handling a married man flirting with you.

Understanding the psychology behind flirting

In order to skillfully deal with a married man hitting on you, you must know the reasons which might have prompted such behaviour in him.

Most married men flirt in order to bring back the thrill and excitement which might be missing in their married life. As they are bored with their routine life after marriage, they tend to find solace in flirting with other women. Some flirt just to see whether they still have the power to attract a woman.

Flirting is also a sign that a married man wants to sleep with you. But there might be a small percentage of married men who genuinely fall for another woman and try to develop a relationship with her by flirting.

Signs a married man is flirting with you

The moment a married man shows interest in you, a series of events might unfold; at first you will try to avoid it, but he will be persistent, you will ultimately give in and enjoy flirting with him as well. But then it might happen that the married man is hitting on you, then backs off while you take the flirting seriously and hope for a future with him. It is really difficult to know whether the married man flirting with you wants to be just friends with you, or he is sincerely interested in starting a relationship with you.

A married man flirting with you can lead to complications.
Image source

How to tell if a married man likes you

  • He keeps an eye on you whenever you are around him and pretends not to notice you when he gets caught
  • His body always leans in your direction, which is a classic sign to show that he is interested in you
  • The married man hitting on you tries to stay in touch with you, either through calls or text messages
  • He keeps mentioning things you both have in common, just to build a connection with you
  • This man will remember each and every detail you share with him, just to show that he is paying attention to you
  • Giving compliments to you will be his habit
  • He will always look for opportunities to hang out with you
  • He will shower you with gifts
  • Your love life will be his centre of attention. He will get jealous if you have someone in your life
  • He makes it clear to you that he is not happy in his married life
  • His behaviour will be very confusing for you. Sometimes he will be absolutely sweet, while sometimes he will play hard to get
  • Over time his physical appearance and dressing style will change in order to impress you and match your likes and dislike

These are all tell-tale signs of male attraction and are are enough to tell you that a married man is flirting with you.

Thus be vigilant and take a wise decision when you are faced with such a situation where a married man is hitting on you.

How to handle a married man flirting with you

When you are tackling this question, do not bother whether the married man is flirting or being friendly with you. The first thing that you have to do is address and sort out your feelings towards the married man. Are you interested in him or just see the married man as a friend/colleague/acquaintance?

If you genuinely like him, then do one of the following:

  1. Reveal your feelings to him and see how it works out for the both of you; or
  2. Keep your feelings hidden and take time to get over him

Choosing the first option will bring serious challenges in your life because you will probably have to be the second woman in his life and even feel guilty about having an affair with a married man. If his wife gets to know, then this will cause more trouble in your love life and hamper your reputation as well. The second option seems the best because you will not ruin the chances of finding the right man for you by investing in a relationship with a married man.

A married man flirting can be dangerous. Kangana Ranaut's relationship with Aditya Pancholi proves that
Kangana Ranaut was in a relationship with the married Aditya Pancholi which she regrets. Image Source

If you are not interested in him, then these are the options for you

He may seem really interested in you and may even try hard to impress you, but if you are clear that you would not get involved with a married man, you need to take a few steps so that you do not develop feelings for him. Married men do not really intend to make you fall in love with them they just want to seduce you, get some fun, and go on with their lives as usual.

Reciprocating the feelings of a married man flirting with you can have serious consequences that sometimes last a lifetime.

1. Be honest and straightforward about your intentions

Everyone loves attention, and you may too get carried away by his gestures and words. Despite liking the attention that you are getting from the married man, you have to stop beating around the bush and stop him from chasing you.

married life

2. Focus your attention elsewhere

In order to stop a married man hitting on you, you can show your interest in someone else. You are probably looking and feeling your best, so why not focus your attention on someone who is available and comes without prior baggage? That will help you spice up your life in a better way and stop a married man flirting with you.

3. Look for his flaws

Anything that he may have said or done, that does not go well with you, focus on it. You love coffee and he likes tea? Focus. You love dogs and he maintains a distance? Focus. Look for those things in him that you like and he dislikes, or he likes and you dislike. A married man hitting on you would hate it if you keep telling him how different you are.

4. Snap all contact

Cut off all communication ties with him so that he gets your signal loud and clear. Block him on your phone, the social channels and try avoiding places where you might bump into him.

Blocked phone number will stop a married man flirting with you.
Image source

5. Resist the urge to respond

It takes two to tango! Avoid the temptation to respond to anything that he says – over e-mail, texts or phone-calls. If you have to, stick to impersonal behaviour and resist to give or share any personal information.

6. Mention his wife

If he would not stop, be cool and ask him about his wife, where does she work, how did they meet etc. It will send the message that you value her existence and may even approach her.

7. Do not seek validation

A lot of us seek validation from men, and when they turn out married, we feel we must be more desirable than his wife and that gives us a high. Do not fall for this, it’s a trap and it is rarely a happy ending

Initially, avoid letting his wife know about it, because he might be either joking or might have unintentionally crossed the line. But if his behaviour persists, you can obviously make his wife aware of his flirtatious nature.

In conclusion, we would just like to say that it is really dishonourable if a married man  is hitting on you and trying to build another relationship outside the marriage. A married man flirting with you is breaking the eternal promise of love and betraying his wife and family. Therefore, you must not become a partner in crime but preserve your dignity by taking a morally right decision.


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15 tips to stop dating a married man

The secret behind how extra marital affairs start and how they end

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